a list of why i love my mother who is crazy.
my momma is so rediculous that when she told me that she was going to adopt a little kenyan boy with a cleft palette, i honestly believed her. And not for just any ole "im a fool" reason, neither. for the very real reason that my momma is just a bit, just a tad, off her rocker.
let's catalog.
starting with dogs:
- i went off to college. she bought a bernese mountain dog. These are exceptionally large dogs.
- amanda and sarah went off to college. crazy momma started fostering dogs left and right. eventually ended up adopting one. a lovely dog named angel. so now, our family which also has 3 cats, a handful of fish, and a lizard of some sort, now this family also has two dogs, plus whatever dog is being fostered. so three dogs! Angel looks kind of like this picture, though this isnt her at all.
- Then lily goes off to college. and of course, my mother gets another dog. but this time it's another berner! one not so fat, though. A girl dog, actually. which my mother has the intention of breeding. she wants lots of little dogs, all running around. luckily for my stepfather's sanity, she decided not to breed the dog. named tej. whos' a spitfire.
Thank goodness she's got about 8 years before arne goes to college. there's no more room left at the foot of her bed.
now onto house projects. my mother is notorious for re-arranging the house every 6 months (just one of her many endearing quirks) but there have been much larger projects:
- when we first moved in, our house had no porch. so she set out designing and getting one built. it was expensive. granted, it's a super nice addition to the house and a great place to eat crabs.
-then she decided that the kitchen would look better red, and that the mini dining room needed a fake window. so she painted one on.
-then she decided that we needed a pool. Figures she'd realize that the year i move out of the house for good! damn! nice pool though. very fun.
i would suggest that next on her chopping block be the upstairs porch, the 'widows walk' ... mostly because she started to re-do it, by taking down the railing that keeps drunk kids from tripping off the roof and landing on the azaleas, but stopped at that point.
she's also got a million and one million dollar ideas.
-she called me last week asking me 'now wouldnt i love an automatic soap dispenser that played a neat little tune every time it dispensed soap?'
-crab cream. i have to admit, i really liked this idea. basically, a cream that you could rub on your hands after eating crabs and it would cut the Old Bay smell right out. i liked the idea because the feeling of dogs licking my fingers gives me the heebie-jeebies.
-dog sitting. during her fostering of dogs, she wanted to also dog sit. yep. more dogs.
-or just dog walking. taking a half dozen feisty dogs out on a leash... she thought it would help her get into better shape too.
That's all i can think up for now. But it was all leading up to this:
I recieved an email today which stated
"Hi Ladies,
This is just a heads up that we may be adopting a little Kenyan boy. He is four and he has a cleft palette which we will have an operation to fix and both Ross and I are seriously looking into it. He also has a sister who is 8 and we arent sure about that..."
and i just wanted to present a case where i dont look like a fool for believing her. even though it's april first.
let's catalog.
starting with dogs:
- i went off to college. she bought a bernese mountain dog. These are exceptionally large dogs.
- amanda and sarah went off to college. crazy momma started fostering dogs left and right. eventually ended up adopting one. a lovely dog named angel. so now, our family which also has 3 cats, a handful of fish, and a lizard of some sort, now this family also has two dogs, plus whatever dog is being fostered. so three dogs! Angel looks kind of like this picture, though this isnt her at all.
- Then lily goes off to college. and of course, my mother gets another dog. but this time it's another berner! one not so fat, though. A girl dog, actually. which my mother has the intention of breeding. she wants lots of little dogs, all running around. luckily for my stepfather's sanity, she decided not to breed the dog. named tej. whos' a spitfire.
Thank goodness she's got about 8 years before arne goes to college. there's no more room left at the foot of her bed.
now onto house projects. my mother is notorious for re-arranging the house every 6 months (just one of her many endearing quirks) but there have been much larger projects:
- when we first moved in, our house had no porch. so she set out designing and getting one built. it was expensive. granted, it's a super nice addition to the house and a great place to eat crabs.
-then she decided that the kitchen would look better red, and that the mini dining room needed a fake window. so she painted one on.
-then she decided that we needed a pool. Figures she'd realize that the year i move out of the house for good! damn! nice pool though. very fun.
i would suggest that next on her chopping block be the upstairs porch, the 'widows walk' ... mostly because she started to re-do it, by taking down the railing that keeps drunk kids from tripping off the roof and landing on the azaleas, but stopped at that point.
she's also got a million and one million dollar ideas.
-she called me last week asking me 'now wouldnt i love an automatic soap dispenser that played a neat little tune every time it dispensed soap?'
-crab cream. i have to admit, i really liked this idea. basically, a cream that you could rub on your hands after eating crabs and it would cut the Old Bay smell right out. i liked the idea because the feeling of dogs licking my fingers gives me the heebie-jeebies.
-dog sitting. during her fostering of dogs, she wanted to also dog sit. yep. more dogs.
-or just dog walking. taking a half dozen feisty dogs out on a leash... she thought it would help her get into better shape too.
That's all i can think up for now. But it was all leading up to this:
I recieved an email today which stated
"Hi Ladies,
This is just a heads up that we may be adopting a little Kenyan boy. He is four and he has a cleft palette which we will have an operation to fix and both Ross and I are seriously looking into it. He also has a sister who is 8 and we arent sure about that..."
and i just wanted to present a case where i dont look like a fool for believing her. even though it's april first.