Just nevermind the previous posts...
Forget it. I can't live my life the way I mentioned in my previous posts, at least not right now. I'm a decent guy and that's just who I am. I'm just really depressed and I know I need to change something in my life, but I'm not sure what. I've had time to think about things, and I dont want to be that kind of guy: the asshole, but I'm just tired of going unappreciated. Not to mention, nobody knows how hard it is to be me. I'm not a simple guy. Whatever I do, I do it intensely. I don't know any happy medium. If I hate you, I hate you with a vengeance. If I love you, I love you better than anyone's ever loved you before. Hence the reason alot of my exes who've seen that side of me keep trying to get me back. Because I'm not a good looking guy- I know this. I don't put on a false front that women find attractive like alot of guys do. I'm just me. The question is, just how much of me do you get to see? Lorna's seen the most of me so far, but even she hasn't seen it all. She never really got to see my romantic side, but she saw my loving side some. She also saw my pissed off/hating side as well. She and I went through alot together. I have memories from her I'll cherish, and I have memories from her I'll hold a grudge against her for for a while now. That's just the kind of relationship we had. Oh well, enough for now. Just disregard the blogs before this one, considering I've changed my mind about that. I'm just gonna go on being me for the time being. At least give things a chance to improve.