Not So Good
My new fav. book is Song of Solomon...literally reading it in class today brought tears to my eyes. A major reoccurring theme in th e book is Abandoned women who are driven insane by their males wanting to 'fly'...my eyes were teary and all..there is a perfect passage that describes my life and history with peter this year. It was like the equivalent of $10,000 worth of therapy all in one chapter of a BOOK + i hate books...now its my weekly therapy. I can't believe how deep this struck me..c'mon pathetic right? no- i freakn' love it. I didn't even cry the first time i saw titanic or a walk to remember...but reading a book..WOW!- DAY 1 of realizing peter can no longer defy me. He threw me out, and I assumed I was garbage. FUCK NYKKI!! Not one person's opinion or view of you is right or enough to define you. I need to start waking up and looking in the mirror and say " I'm hot young and single...how the fuck is him..p.p.peter??? yeah.. everyone was right along..i'm too pretty to be with him. lol, I am too GOOD for him. cuz my shit dont smell around him- I'm on another planet when compared to peter. he's going to be begging for me back. ignore me and i'll go away. " Be thin or stay home..." well right now i'm staying home, but when i'm thin again, AND I PROMISE I WILL BE...fucking smokn' he's going to be crying for me.