Blue Balls: The Movie
What the fuck was that? Honestly, I've seen more action at a high school dance than this movie. No one was getting any and even the audience was like "DO IT." by the end.
It also felt like it was a 9 hour movie. And again, KStew's twitchy neurosis isn't cute and Neddy's suicide talk was like...wtf. It sucks when the main characters are all total morons, you know?
EXCEPT: Jacob Black. Who will have me arrested for ogling an Filipino Rent Boy who's 16. And everything was so fucking homoerotic, did anyone notice that? The wolf pack was just fucking gay.
Also there was so much sexual tension in the move that EVERYONE had sexual tension.
Really though, it was all about Alice being absolutely A+ and I hope she has hatesex with Jacob while Jasper watches.
JASPIE THE ASPIE MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD. What is wrooong with your fucking face, Jackson Rathbone?
Also the Volturi were just a band of raging homosexuals. And everytime Emmett talked I just heard "DERP DERP DERP."
But really. It's all about Alice, Charlie, and Jacob.