Feb 15, 2005 09:25
my mother woke me up at about 540 this morning to tell me my great grandmother died
i lay there sobbing and i didnt really understand why
i never really knew my grandma hellen very well but if you know me
i love people unconditionally very easily
you never know how much youve missed out on in knowing a person until youve lost the opportunity to do so
and while i loved her very much
the thing that makes me really sad is to think to myself
did she know???
and the most important thing is not how much i loved her...but how much she loved me
did i have enough impact on her life for her to love me
i know when my parents first started out their life together it was hard
my grandmother especially gave my mother a hard time about marrying a black man
but i truly think and mainly hope that throughout her past 23 years or so my great grandmother no longer looked at people and judged them due to the color of their skin
i hope that she could look at me and see me not brown
i hope she knew how much i really loved her and i hope that i am fortunate enough to have had her love returned
i will really miss her and maybe God has given her a garden up there that she will not have to work hard to maintain
maybe shes just sitting up there...breathing again on her own...smelling the tiger lillies...
i would like to take this opportunity to say goodbye...even though its just too late...