(no subject)
this is just for me.so i am being myself on here(from now on).i miss someone so much.but i'm trying my best to get over it(ITS NOT WHO YOU THINK IT IS!!!!*ie chris*)(that means that its not chris).and i also had a dream about nathan.it was really really strange.i dont feel like i'm actually ugly.i feel like their is a trait that i have that deflects people.and i am being myself,and i think theirs something there.i really have no clue.i really wish i had someone who cared about me.and respected me,and loved me,for....me ...theirs nothing i can do about the fact that people dont like me for me.well a few do.but whatever.i um just don't feel good.i'm really depresssed.
anyway, i talked to chris today for the first time in a long time. it was cool. it felt awsome to talk to him without feeling a terrible ache in my heart. it was awsome. i miss being able to talk to him about everything and anything i want. but whatever i have other people to talk to. like dreama, and eljay, and jake. i know i can talk to them about anything. i'm writing a long entry because i never do. i'm surposed to be doing my scince final right now. but i'm to fucking procrastinating to do it right now. it will get done though. someone cut, they haven't done for a long time. i love this person lots and lots and lots. they cut, and they were like why do you care, it doesn't effect you directly. i was like yeah, it does. i care about you, and if your parents send you to the asylum, it will certenly effect me. i try harder than anything to help this person feel better, and not shitty, and whenever i try, its futile, and they make me know it.it sucks so much. i feel like she takes me for granted. i really do. but not that it matters.
anyway, i got a hug from nathan today. that was cool. ooh and jake had eyeliner on today, it was hot! yeah, i love jake! i'm so glad that he moved here. hes a great guy.
i also went to my big brother kevins house on sunday. it was pretty cool. exept for the whole fact that my dad didn't feed us till like 630 at night, and i hadn't eaten all day, so i was in an extremly extremly bad fucking moood, and getting bit by a fucking parrot didnt help. anyway, yeah went to by brother kevins house in onalaska,its right by some town that starts with an e. whatever though. hes turned 20. hes a great guy, also, his girlfriend, who is pretty cool. she works at a pet shop., and thats where i got bit by a parrot. but anyway, i have nothing to do right now. but yeah my brother and his girlfriend have 2 chinchillas, and a huge lizard, and a buncha fish. i dont give a rats ass though, i bored.
anyway, i talked to chris today for the first time in a long time. it was cool. it felt awsome to talk to him without feeling a terrible ache in my heart. it was awsome. i miss being able to talk to him about everything and anything i want. but whatever i have other people to talk to. like dreama, and eljay, and jake. i know i can talk to them about anything. i'm writing a long entry because i never do. i'm surposed to be doing my scince final right now. but i'm to fucking procrastinating to do it right now. it will get done though. someone cut, they haven't done for a long time. i love this person lots and lots and lots. they cut, and they were like why do you care, it doesn't effect you directly. i was like yeah, it does. i care about you, and if your parents send you to the asylum, it will certenly effect me. i try harder than anything to help this person feel better, and not shitty, and whenever i try, its futile, and they make me know it.it sucks so much. i feel like she takes me for granted. i really do. but not that it matters.
anyway, i got a hug from nathan today. that was cool. ooh and jake had eyeliner on today, it was hot! yeah, i love jake! i'm so glad that he moved here. hes a great guy.
i also went to my big brother kevins house on sunday. it was pretty cool. exept for the whole fact that my dad didn't feed us till like 630 at night, and i hadn't eaten all day, so i was in an extremly extremly bad fucking moood, and getting bit by a fucking parrot didnt help. anyway, yeah went to by brother kevins house in onalaska,its right by some town that starts with an e. whatever though. hes turned 20. hes a great guy, also, his girlfriend, who is pretty cool. she works at a pet shop., and thats where i got bit by a parrot. but anyway, i have nothing to do right now. but yeah my brother and his girlfriend have 2 chinchillas, and a huge lizard, and a buncha fish. i dont give a rats ass though, i bored.