(no subject)
so...ive been really busy lately with finishing school, dance shows, and senior stuff. ended up with a ninety-one percent on my english term paper...still an a which is fucking awesome considering she gives out very few. the dance show went better than i thought it would...our birdy costumes were wonderful. haha. oooh oooh oooh i wanna be like youuu! finals werent too horrible considering my grades were decent enough to not worry about not graduating. prom turned out to be a lot better than i anticipated. but grad nite (which was last night) ended up being less than wonderful. my guest spent no time with me...which is both of our faults...but i had a less than great night because of it. oh and ive been super emotional lately. no, im not pmsing as my mother asks, nor am i having problems with kimberly. im just being weird. and i want it to stop. now. im sad because im graduating, and though i hate to admit it, i will miss that school and some of the people. ive cried two days straight. and it may not seem like a lot, but when one day runs into the next it just feels like one huge cryingfest. and its about everything. people being rude to me. the table ive eaten lunch at this year. not feeling good enough. feeling like the dramatic girlfriend. knowing ill be leaving friends ive just made. knowing ill be leaving this town...even though it is just a bubble we live in. missing my kimberly. and so much more. im so drained right now. i didnt think i could cry anymore...but i guess i can. i want to sleep but i dont feel like i can. ive been up since 5:40 thursday morning...about thirty hours. and i have too much on my mind.
i need to talk to kimberly.
i need to talk to my mother.
and im sure there are other people i need to talk to as well but im so delirious at the moment that i dont know who they are.
i really do hope i am able to lead a semi-normal life soon in terms of my emotions. or else ill have to start wearing water-proof make-up. and i surely dont have the money to be spending on that.
graduation is tuesday. all my work for my classes is done. i just need to calm down now and start planning my move to oregon. i think i need to move there as soon as possible...focus on my future. and everything will start feeling better.
i need to talk to kimberly.
i need to talk to my mother.
and im sure there are other people i need to talk to as well but im so delirious at the moment that i dont know who they are.
i really do hope i am able to lead a semi-normal life soon in terms of my emotions. or else ill have to start wearing water-proof make-up. and i surely dont have the money to be spending on that.
graduation is tuesday. all my work for my classes is done. i just need to calm down now and start planning my move to oregon. i think i need to move there as soon as possible...focus on my future. and everything will start feeling better.