A Primal Right.
Title: A Primal Right.
Author: lovenhardt1
Banner:qafmaniac.
Word Count: ~58.000. This chapter 2.523
Pairing: Adam/Tommy (Werewolf).
Warnings: Sexual content, minor character death.
Rating: NC17
Disclaimers: The people you might recognize in here are NOT mine. I'm not making any profit, I'm only doing this for fun. There is no way this ever happened and so on. Oh…. And werewolves don’t exist either…. Sowry.
Beta:thrace_adams. Thank you sweetie for all your help, I love you so much for it! All your hard work made mine shine.
Type: Werewolf AU. Romance with just enough angst to make it good.
A/N: This fic is written for my dear friend dkymekare because she loves wolves above.
I had some really incredible cheerleaders on this fic!!! I love you all dearly! And I couldn’t have done it without you! So THANK YOU!!!
Please do not link/copy/share/whatever this anywhere. Thank you.
Summary: You know that feeling of being in control? Of knowing what happens next? You’ve got it all worked out, knows it’ll be hard work but worth it. You’re so focused on carefully laid plans that you kinda forgot about you…. but then something or someone comes along and changes everything. Suddenly you’re not even in charge of your own heart anymore. Yeah. That’s what happened to me.
Sit down and let me tell you a story… you might want to put your legs up and get comfortable, we’ll be here for a while.
It all began a day I was letting my wolf have some fun in the woods…
Opening the door to my room I spotted Mia on my bed facing the TV and flipping through channels.
“Hey.” I walked over to the bed and crawled in behind her, she turned to look at me with questions, and lots of them, written all over her pretty face.
“Hey,” she said in a soft tone.
There isn’t exactly a lot of space in my bed and she was pretty much sprawled all over it. “Scoot!”
She moved over and snuggled close as soon as I settled down. I put my arms around her and pressed a kiss to her temple. She went back to search for something good to watch but asked, “So?”
“Honestly? I don’t know what to tell you.”
“Hmm. Then start with what you do know. What happened after you sent me away?”
The thing about Mia is that she knows how to push all of my buttons, well almost all of them, and right there she totally pushed the guilt button. And as always I fucking caved.
“Uhm, he was bleeding out and there was just one thing left I could do…so that’s what I did.”
“You bit him??” The horror in her voice made me wince. Like I would ever do that! You just don’t turn anyone that isn’t aware of the catch and you sure as hell don’t do it to someone that isn’t asking and your pack doesn’t approve of.
“What the hell, Mia? No, I fed him some of my blood. And when he was healed up I told him to get his ass out of there and never come back.” I very deliberately left out what that had made me feel like. The feeling of loss was mine. Mine alone and why worry her anyway?
“You mixed blood with him? Tell me you didn’t.” again her train wreck of thoughts scared me a little, did she really think I would be so reckless as to take something from him that would be meant for a mate? That I would change my scent and tie myself to him forever…. To save him? A stranger? Deeply offended, I answered her question.
“Do I smell like that? No, I didn’t. I offered him a chance to survive on my blood and he took it. Okay?”
She sounded tired and strained, “No, it’s not okay, why did you do that? He’s just a human; he shouldn’t be any of your concern, Tommy.”
Man, she had a good point there.
“I know that and I don’t know why… I just felt like it was something I had to do. Needed to do.”
She turned to look at me, her eyes searching for answers. She put her arms around my neck and I put a leg over hers to bring us closer. She sniffed my throat and kissed it softly before speaking, her voice barely a whisper,
“You needed to save him?”
“Yeah, it was like… I didn’t even get a say in it, my wolf reacted and suddenly I was trying to keep him from harm and the next thing I’m sitting next to him naked as the day I was born biting my wrist to save him from dying.”
“And?” she prompted, raising both her eyebrows; the demanding look in her eyes making me squirm. I couldn’t help but wonder if she somehow knew about the weird powerful connection I'd felt when the guy had looked at me and the violent explosion of wanting to own and be owned when we actually touched.
“What do you mean, ‘and’?” I knew the stall wouldn’t work but I still had to try.
She narrowed her eyes and saw right through my act. “Aww come on, Tommy, you’re not stupid. Tell me, I want to know.”
Damn her and damn my fucking life!
“But I don’t know what to tell you! What is it you want to know? That I felt some kind of strange connection? That I wanted to keep him safe forever? That he was fucking gorgeous, with precious freckles? Making me want something I could never have? That I fucking had to run out of there as fast as my fucking legs could carry me as soon as he asked for my name, wanting to know who saved his ass? Or that my heart still aches knowing that I’ll never see him again? Or the fact that I know that saving his fucking ass might have been the dumbest thing I’ve ever done because it jeopardizes the new pack? If Darren finds out about me breaking the laws like this I’ll never be allowed to step up to the alpha role, I’ll be an outcast, every god damn dream you and I ever talked about could be tossed out with the bathwater. So tell me what it is you want to know about Mia, because I’m not really sure what you’re asking for here.”
She looked at me with pity in her eyes and brushed my hair away from my face, tucking it gently behind my right ear. “Oh baby. This is bad.”
“I fucking know! I need to keep this under the radar until the ceremony is over and you and I are bound together. I promise I’ll do my best not to fail you, or everyone else for that matter.”
“No Tommy, that’s not what I meant.”
“Oh. What did you mean then?” She had my head spinning. I was so fucking confused.
“Uhm… I’m not really going to tell you if you haven’t figured it out yet. But please don’t put our future at risk Tommy.”
“I won’t Mia! You’re my mate, and we’re going to form the new pack at the next full moon. We've been planning this practically since we were born. We have plans baby, dreams. I’m not about to throw them all away. I wasn’t thinking…It’s just a stupid need and it's not like I’ve never felt like that before.”
“Uhm… Okay… with who?”
I was totally taken aback by her question, so I went for humor.
“Aww, baby, you don’t really want to know about my sex life do you?”
Judging by the look on her face, I missed by a mile.
“Maybe I should. I kinda thought we were saving it, I know I am,” she said.
Oh shit! FUCK. This was, I don’t even know, but bad… or ‘fucked up’ came to mind. I tried to wrap my head around what exactly that meant.
“You mean you haven’t? Mia are you fucking kidding me?”
“No, mom would have killed me. That’s meant for you.”
I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen her this sincere. Wonder, awe, and utter terror all seemed to swirl around me and I hope I actually managed to disguise my scent before giving it all away. I really didn’t want to hurt her.
“For me?... is that what you want? Me?”
“Yeah… I mean why not? I’ve never let myself think about any other but you, no point in it.”
“You’ve thought about it?” This time I know I didn’t manage to keep the disbelief out of my voice, because she used the same tone on me,
“You haven’t?”
I kissed her forehead to take the edge of the words. “Not really, I love you. I can’t think of one single person I love more than you, but I’ve never thought of that.”
“You never thought of that?” she whispered and I shook my head. “Do you not think I’m pretty enough?”
“Oh no! Mia, you’re beautiful! Don’t ever doubt that!”
“So is it the girl thing?”
“No, not at all… I’ve just…it’s… you’re like a sister.”
She nodded and chuckled a little and with a wicked smirk she asked me, “Uhm where the hell did you imagine the next generation would come from? Brought here by the Stork?”
I must have looked incredibly stupid. I certainly felt like it. “I’ve never thought of that either.”
She looked at me with shock in her eyes. I realize now that I've been so naïve in the way I'd been thinking about our pact, that all we needed was our friendship and our own pack to make the world a better place. I needed to know for sure how she felt, so I asked.
“I thought you felt the same. I thought our plans and dreams were created around our friendship. Was I wrong?” The fondness playing in her eyes and on her lips almost killed me, so I hid my face in the crook of her neck and she combed her fingers through my hair.
“No it’s just… well you’re my world Tommy, everything I do is linked to you, you’re my best friend, you’re supposed to be my mate,” she pushed my head back and looked at me pointedly and emphasized her next words. “In. Every. Way. And I thought, at least until today, that you would always belong to me.”
“Are you jealous?” It was supposed to piss her off because her last sentence kinda pissed me off. I wasn’t running from my promise. I got the reaction I wanted.
“Of course I’m jealous, I could lose you because of him. How am I supposed to compete against a fucking male?”
And wow, I so didn’t see that one coming. I ached all over, feeling the loss of something that was never mine to begin with, all over again. I pushed myself off the bed, her proximity suffocating me. With a hard stare, I demanded to know why we were back on that subject,
“Him? Why are we back to him? I didn’t fuck him. I’m never going to see him again and I’ve never been with a man. Secondly, I’m not backing out. I’m just fucking confused. About everything! And your mate/sex talk sure as hell isn’t helping!”
She got off the bed too, crossed the floor and cradled my face and with an impossibly patient tone in her voice she said, “Promise me you won’t leave for him. And I’m not asking for me but for the rest of the wolves.”
Pure and utter pain spiked through me as my wolf struggled with the meaning of her words; it wanted nothing more than to be back to the glade in the forest to linger in what could have been. I wouldn’t let it, not right now. But my wolf wanted out of there, it wanted to be alone, to lick its wounds and mourn what would never be. It paced angrily inside me, desperately wanting me to shift so it could run. I wouldn’t let it though, couldn't let it, not right now.
“Why would I leave? I’m never going to see him again!”
“Promise!” she whispered and rubbed our noses together.
I tried to say it, but the words wouldn't come. I tried to use another approach. “Of course I’m not-“
“No Tommy, promise, say, I promise!” She held my gaze willing me to say it.
I wanted to, I really did. “I…” Nothing, nothing at all. I saw the emotions run over her face, regret, sadness and pity?
“You can’t! Can you? You can’t actually say it?! You literally can’t make the words form on your lips.” She shook her head and the look of defeat made me desperate, desperate to make her happy, to make things right between us again.
“I…”
She sighed heavily and bumped her forehead against mine and then slowly rubbed our cheeks together, the show of affection so much more canine than human. And you don’t even realize what this means? She asked softly in my mind.
That’s where it all fell into place. He was my fucking mate! MATE! My destined soulmate, the one created just for me. “Oh.”
She let out a shaky breath, “Yeah oh! So what are you going to do?”
My mind went completely blank, for several minutes I just stood there with absolutely no coherent thought left in my dumbass head. How the fuck was I supposed to know how to deal? There were promises made when we were born, there were other wolves to consider, this wasn’t just about me. It was about the pack too, the pack I was meant to lead in two weeks’ time.
“Nothing! Uhm… what was planned all along. I’m not bailing out on you, on them!”
“But yet you still can’t promise me. Excuse me for not really trusting it until it actually happens at the next full moon.”
I felt like she’d punched me in the stomach, taking away every breath from me. Did she really think that little of me?
With one last long look at me she turned to leave the room. I wasn’t about to let her, I needed her to say that she trusted me. “Mia.” She didn’t even turn to look at me but sped up her pace practically running down the hallway; I jolted and chased her shouting “Mia. Don’t you fucking run out on me like that.”
My mother’s voice stopped me before I got to Mia, “Thomas Joseph I need a word.”
Her voice was stern, but I did my best to ignore it, “Not now mom.” I needed to get to Mia before she turned into her wolf and ran into the woods.
“Thomas!” The demand was right there, the alpha tone soaking through my name and I had no fucking choice but to stay. I glared at my mother but she snorted at the defiance she saw in my eyes.
“Two more weeks honey before that look gets you anywhere, now spill it! Why did you sneak in through the backdoor and go straight to the shower and why did whatever mistake you made make Mia run out the door like that?”
A million thoughts went whirling about in my head and I desperately wanted to grab just one of them and throw it at my mom, but nothing!
“You’re stalling! And I can smell a bad excuse half a mile away sweetheart, just fess up so we can work on making it right again.”
Damn her, for using the alpha tone again, my mother played dirty pool like no one else!
Defeated I told her everything, ending the confession with, “I’m not sure you can do anything about this mom, this is my mess and I gotta clean it up.” She pulled me into one of those hugs only your mother can provide, making everything feel a little better.
“Yeah, I can see that, but I can make sure Darren doesn’t figure anything out. That is if you can stay away from the boy.” I gave her a grateful smile.
“I can,” I took a deep breath and made a promise to myself. “I will.”
She smiled a little hesitantly “You will try. Let’s leave it with that for now. And now you better make Mia feel special.”
I hauled off my t-shirt and lost the pants going out the front door and shouted back to my mother just before I turned, “I’m on it.”
And then I let the wolf take over in the search of Mia.
chapter 3