confusion

[loveless603]

i'm at a crossroads...

do i wait it out?
do i follow my heart?
my heart, as we all know, has a tendency to be wrong.

i miss creating.
i miss art and fucking and my youth and music.
loud, loud music.

i used to have someone who created only for me.
i used to have fresh flowers every thursday.
i was also forced to live inside a world i did not belong in.

i'm always miserable.
always angry.
simply unhappy.

why can't i just be happy?
he's a good man.
why don't i love him the way i should...