Love Gone Mad Chapter 1
Kris and Adam had been on and off for almost two years since the American Idol tour. It wasn't until recently that Adam realized that Katy, Kris' wife, was taking a toll on him. Adam did not like knowing Kris was with her and wasn't making any attempt to get rid of her.
Katy was the exact reason why Adam and Kris were on and off. Adam wanted Kris for himself, not for himself AND Katy. It just wasn't fair. Sure, Adam thought she was a nice girl, but if Adam and Kris wanted to be happy, the bitch HAD to go. All the times Kris had told Adam not to worry about her were sufficient for a while, but it didn't keep him satisfied for long. It was heart breaking for Adam to know that Kris wasn't exactly one hundred percent his, even though Kris told him time after time again that he was. It’s just, Adam always had that little bit of doubt in the back of his mind.
Adam was sitting on the counter top, tired, with a cup of black coffee in his hand. He had been waiting alone for three days for Kris to come home from the Hawaii vacation him and Katy had taken. When Adam heard his apartment door being unlocked, he didn't even make an attempt to go greet Kris. Adam had thought long and hard the past few nights; he could not be happy with Kris is Katy was in the picture. It just was NOT possible. He let tears fall softly off his cheeks and onto his pants. This was so hard.
This was one of the many times when Adam had lost his composure when Kris got home from days with Katy. It wasn't right. Kris shouldn't be with Katy and him... just him. Adam had always got away with crying because he'd simply say 'I missed you' and wipe them away. This time, it wasn't going to be that simple. Adam was about to make an extremely hard and rational decision and that's why tears flowed from those crystal baby blue eyes.
"Adam?" Kris called out. Usually he was met with a tight hug and sweet kisses from Adam. Kris dropped his bags and looked around. Strange. It was pitch black. He turned on a light. Kris knew that Adam hated the dark, especially if he was alone in it. Kris felt that something was wrong. He knew that Adam wasn't sleeping, there was no way he could be if he knew Kris was coming home. He started to head to the kitchen because he saw a glow coming from the night light that was never on.
"Adam? Where ya at, hun?" Kris called again. Kris turned into the kitchen and flipped the light on.
"Ad-?" He instantly dropped to the floor where Adam had now sat, knees to his chest, whimpering, sniffling, and crying.
"Baby?? What-" Kris hugged him close and put a kiss to the top of his head. Adams tears just flowed down his cheeks. Kris took his thumbs, running them under Adams obvious tired eyes, catching tears. Adam just kept his head down; looking at Kris would be unbearable.
"Hunny, baby, what's wrong? Baby, please-" Kris pulled back and looked at Adams face. He was shaking and sobbing now.
"We c-can't-" Adam whispered when he felt Kris staring at him. Kris was so lost. Why was his baby crying? It almost broke his heart in half; it had never been this bad when he came home to Adam. Little did Kris know that Adam's heart was already broken.
"Can't what, Adam? Hey, hey, shhhh. Baby, it's okay. Just talk to me. What's wrong??" Kris tried his hardest to calm Adam down. Adam wiped his tears with his shirt.
"We can't b-be together anym-ore," Adam said. He felt so broken. He wanted to be with Kris so bad, but this had to happen. Kris' eyes were wide as he took in what Adam said.
"Wha-," Kris swallowed the now huge lump in his throat, "...what?" He felt his face heat up.
"Adam. Baby, you can't be serious?... why? What's wrong, what happened? Why are you saying that?" Kris was crying now. He saw so much hurt in Adams eyes. He held his face with one hand, caressing Adams cheek with his thumb.
"Baby..." Kris whispered and went in to kiss those lips he so desperately missed. Adam turned his head and Kris' lips brushed against his cheek instead.
"Please, don't." Adam mumbled. He tried so hard to pull himself together so he could explain to Kris was was wrong. Feeling rejected and hurt, Kris got up and sat in a chair sideways, in front of Adam. Kris was in shock. He could honestly say he never thought this would happen. He looked pissed and mad and he kind of felt that way. He wanted an explanation.
"I can't be with you if you're with Katy, Kris." Adam said, his voice low. Kris looked up. He almost wanted to laugh.
"This is what this is about? Adam- I've told you so many times-" Kris was interrupted before he could even finish.
"Sometimes actions speak louder than words, Kristopher! You do not know how bad it gets- I get- when you're gone for days! You do not know what it's like to stay up every night, bawling your eyes out, clinging to a pillow and crying ever harder because no damn pillow can make up for your absence... NO fucking pillow can compare to your body beside mine. I mean, I honestly don't believe you know what it's like to lay in a ball under the blankets and shuddering because I'm scared. I hate the fucking dark! And the thing that makes everything worse is that- “ Adam was yelling, he was so angry and so upset, "I know you are with her and NOT me. I just can't do it anymore! It hurts more than you could possibly imagine. Because when you don't have me, you have her! When I don't have you, I don't have anyone, because I only want you, and I want you to only want me!" Adam was sobbing once again. Kris didn't know what to say.
He didn't love Katy as much as he did Adam, that was just nearly impossible. She was just an easy cover up for Kris. Him being a married man didn't give people a reason to seriously question why he was always with Adam. Kris had fallen so madly in love with his best friend, and life was so easy without the press and the paparazzi and the interviews. If people knew about them, they would all flip shit. Kris didn't want people attacking him for loving a man, nor did he want to hear the whole religion shit from his family. Adam starred at him. Kris really REALLY deeply and truly cared about Adam. When they were together, everything was so damn perfect.
Kris was choked up and not knowing what to say, he regretfully spit out, "Adam, please stop being so damn jealous of Katy." That was it.
"Get the fuck out." Adam said through tears. It hit Kris hard when he realized he shouldn't have called Adam jealous.
"Shit Adam, I'm sorr-" It wasn't good enough.
"GET OUT!!!" Adam yelled again. Kris wasn't in the mood to argue; seeing Adam in so much pain, he felt like his heart was going to explode.
"Adam, I need yo-" And he got cut off once again.
"Who, me? I think not. You've made that quite clear. You got Katy, so go get her!!" Adam was devastated. He felt his heart breaking ten times worse. Kris got up from his chair with misty eyes and walked to the exit of the kitchen. "How am I supposed to love you when all you do is hurt me??" Adam whispered. No answer, and he got aggravated."I'm sure it will be easy for you to forget me!" Adam yelled, and wiped away tears that were reforming.
He turned and looked back for one last look at Adam and said, "I may have Katy, Adam... but I NEED you. That's the difference." And he grabbed his bags and left. Adam stayed on the floor and wept, feeling colder, lonelier, and more heart broken than he had ever felt before.
Katy was the exact reason why Adam and Kris were on and off. Adam wanted Kris for himself, not for himself AND Katy. It just wasn't fair. Sure, Adam thought she was a nice girl, but if Adam and Kris wanted to be happy, the bitch HAD to go. All the times Kris had told Adam not to worry about her were sufficient for a while, but it didn't keep him satisfied for long. It was heart breaking for Adam to know that Kris wasn't exactly one hundred percent his, even though Kris told him time after time again that he was. It’s just, Adam always had that little bit of doubt in the back of his mind.
Adam was sitting on the counter top, tired, with a cup of black coffee in his hand. He had been waiting alone for three days for Kris to come home from the Hawaii vacation him and Katy had taken. When Adam heard his apartment door being unlocked, he didn't even make an attempt to go greet Kris. Adam had thought long and hard the past few nights; he could not be happy with Kris is Katy was in the picture. It just was NOT possible. He let tears fall softly off his cheeks and onto his pants. This was so hard.
This was one of the many times when Adam had lost his composure when Kris got home from days with Katy. It wasn't right. Kris shouldn't be with Katy and him... just him. Adam had always got away with crying because he'd simply say 'I missed you' and wipe them away. This time, it wasn't going to be that simple. Adam was about to make an extremely hard and rational decision and that's why tears flowed from those crystal baby blue eyes.
"Adam?" Kris called out. Usually he was met with a tight hug and sweet kisses from Adam. Kris dropped his bags and looked around. Strange. It was pitch black. He turned on a light. Kris knew that Adam hated the dark, especially if he was alone in it. Kris felt that something was wrong. He knew that Adam wasn't sleeping, there was no way he could be if he knew Kris was coming home. He started to head to the kitchen because he saw a glow coming from the night light that was never on.
"Adam? Where ya at, hun?" Kris called again. Kris turned into the kitchen and flipped the light on.
"Ad-?" He instantly dropped to the floor where Adam had now sat, knees to his chest, whimpering, sniffling, and crying.
"Baby?? What-" Kris hugged him close and put a kiss to the top of his head. Adams tears just flowed down his cheeks. Kris took his thumbs, running them under Adams obvious tired eyes, catching tears. Adam just kept his head down; looking at Kris would be unbearable.
"Hunny, baby, what's wrong? Baby, please-" Kris pulled back and looked at Adams face. He was shaking and sobbing now.
"We c-can't-" Adam whispered when he felt Kris staring at him. Kris was so lost. Why was his baby crying? It almost broke his heart in half; it had never been this bad when he came home to Adam. Little did Kris know that Adam's heart was already broken.
"Can't what, Adam? Hey, hey, shhhh. Baby, it's okay. Just talk to me. What's wrong??" Kris tried his hardest to calm Adam down. Adam wiped his tears with his shirt.
"We can't b-be together anym-ore," Adam said. He felt so broken. He wanted to be with Kris so bad, but this had to happen. Kris' eyes were wide as he took in what Adam said.
"Wha-," Kris swallowed the now huge lump in his throat, "...what?" He felt his face heat up.
"Adam. Baby, you can't be serious?... why? What's wrong, what happened? Why are you saying that?" Kris was crying now. He saw so much hurt in Adams eyes. He held his face with one hand, caressing Adams cheek with his thumb.
"Baby..." Kris whispered and went in to kiss those lips he so desperately missed. Adam turned his head and Kris' lips brushed against his cheek instead.
"Please, don't." Adam mumbled. He tried so hard to pull himself together so he could explain to Kris was was wrong. Feeling rejected and hurt, Kris got up and sat in a chair sideways, in front of Adam. Kris was in shock. He could honestly say he never thought this would happen. He looked pissed and mad and he kind of felt that way. He wanted an explanation.
"I can't be with you if you're with Katy, Kris." Adam said, his voice low. Kris looked up. He almost wanted to laugh.
"This is what this is about? Adam- I've told you so many times-" Kris was interrupted before he could even finish.
"Sometimes actions speak louder than words, Kristopher! You do not know how bad it gets- I get- when you're gone for days! You do not know what it's like to stay up every night, bawling your eyes out, clinging to a pillow and crying ever harder because no damn pillow can make up for your absence... NO fucking pillow can compare to your body beside mine. I mean, I honestly don't believe you know what it's like to lay in a ball under the blankets and shuddering because I'm scared. I hate the fucking dark! And the thing that makes everything worse is that- “ Adam was yelling, he was so angry and so upset, "I know you are with her and NOT me. I just can't do it anymore! It hurts more than you could possibly imagine. Because when you don't have me, you have her! When I don't have you, I don't have anyone, because I only want you, and I want you to only want me!" Adam was sobbing once again. Kris didn't know what to say.
He didn't love Katy as much as he did Adam, that was just nearly impossible. She was just an easy cover up for Kris. Him being a married man didn't give people a reason to seriously question why he was always with Adam. Kris had fallen so madly in love with his best friend, and life was so easy without the press and the paparazzi and the interviews. If people knew about them, they would all flip shit. Kris didn't want people attacking him for loving a man, nor did he want to hear the whole religion shit from his family. Adam starred at him. Kris really REALLY deeply and truly cared about Adam. When they were together, everything was so damn perfect.
Kris was choked up and not knowing what to say, he regretfully spit out, "Adam, please stop being so damn jealous of Katy." That was it.
"Get the fuck out." Adam said through tears. It hit Kris hard when he realized he shouldn't have called Adam jealous.
"Shit Adam, I'm sorr-" It wasn't good enough.
"GET OUT!!!" Adam yelled again. Kris wasn't in the mood to argue; seeing Adam in so much pain, he felt like his heart was going to explode.
"Adam, I need yo-" And he got cut off once again.
"Who, me? I think not. You've made that quite clear. You got Katy, so go get her!!" Adam was devastated. He felt his heart breaking ten times worse. Kris got up from his chair with misty eyes and walked to the exit of the kitchen. "How am I supposed to love you when all you do is hurt me??" Adam whispered. No answer, and he got aggravated."I'm sure it will be easy for you to forget me!" Adam yelled, and wiped away tears that were reforming.
He turned and looked back for one last look at Adam and said, "I may have Katy, Adam... but I NEED you. That's the difference." And he grabbed his bags and left. Adam stayed on the floor and wept, feeling colder, lonelier, and more heart broken than he had ever felt before.