Realization
I've realized what has made me sad. It wasn't losing Jill, but trying to give up and relinquish any hope for the future. I now see that Jill needs her space, and I respect that, but I am not giving up. While I'm at college, I want Jill to be the happiest she can be, and if she finds someone who makes me look like a slug comparatively, then so be it. I will also date people; I'm not ready for a relationship, and if I find someone who tops Jill (unlikely), then I will tell her. Jill, I won't get in your way. I will respect anyone you choose to date or have a relationship with, but I will also be a constant friend to you. I felt so bad because I was told that I needed to forget about you. I can't and won't do that. All is fair in love and war, and I will aim to be the best person to you that I possibly can be. I was sad, because I was going down without a fight. I won't. I made a promise to you. I will not let it be broken. I don't break promises. Ever. I feel happy again. :)