its not fair.
you know whats frustrating? I could talk talk talk till I'm blue in the face and it won't make a difference. I will never get through to you. You always make me out to be the shitty person. But don't you realize? You bring it out in me. We constantly fight because you start it. I'm sick of defending myself. And telling you whats up and how things really are. I'm getting sick of this. You have no right to be. You dont even listen to me when I talk. I feel like I'm wasting it. I'm wasting it on you. I feel like you're sucking me dry. Like you're sucking everything good from me. Like I won't have enough to give to anyone when this is all over. And I want something more than just eh. I want something so fucking extreme and awesome and amazing that I'm not going to be able to handle it. But you can't give that to me. Don't fucking say that you dont care. It makes you look stupid. I care too much for the both of us and I get shit on in the process. I lose alittle bit of myself everytime I talk to you. Everytime you make me do something I dont want to. I'm not crazy or obnoxious or stupid or a bitch. I'm none of those things. I'm intelligent. And you're threatened. You're threatened that I'll realize how smart I am and leave you. But I already realize it. I'm too good for this. I'm too good for you. No matter how many times you make me feel like shit by saying I'm not enough. That I'll never make you happy in the way Melissa did. Well fuck you. You fucked that up. I don't want to be like her. You knew what you were getting into before you even said yes to this. I feel like Im holding on to something that was never there in the first place. Just to have something to hold on to.