loathe
i hate how when i have the most to say, no one is listening. when i try to tell you how i'm feeling through my eyes, you're never looking. despite the breaking glass you can see, you only see the exterior, you never dig deep enough into the gateways of my soul to tell what's either wrong or right. i look at you so deep for so long, and in my head i'm screaming 'i'm too scared to do this, there are so many reasons', in my head i'm screaming 'i love you so much, if only you knew how much you meant to me, if only i could show you', in my head i'm screaming so many things i'm afraid you'll never hear, and i'm afraid if i tell you out loud it will break the moment and the feeling and everything, because it's so frail & fragile & delicate. i try to look deep into your eyes, cliche as that may be deep is the only word to describe how far into your mind and heart i'm seeking to tell you this, and tell you that you're the only reason i'm living. you're my motivation to wait for better days and life, better things to come along. it's been so hard lately, for so many millions of reasons and yet none all at the same time, but with your hand in my hand walking down this rock road, i'm still walking, and i'm still breathing. i wish you knew how much i loved you. i wish i could tell you, i wish i could show you. there are so many invisible barriers holding me back.
i only wish i could make you understand, make you remember how all this feels. but i know it's hard, with all your experience you just can't remember. i know, and i understand, and i still do and will love you with all that i have.
i only wish i could make you understand, make you remember how all this feels. but i know it's hard, with all your experience you just can't remember. i know, and i understand, and i still do and will love you with all that i have.