Without a Heart; prologue
W I T H O U T A H E A R T
this is a love story about a vampire girl and a human boy . . .
Main Cast
Ahn Sohee - Wonder Girls
Kim Heechul - Super Junior
Kim Jaejoong - TVXQ
Cho Kyuhyun - Super Junior
Jay Kim - The TRAX
Ham Eunjung - T-ara
Kim Yoobin - Wonder Girls
Park Gyuri - KARA
Park Jaebeom
Friends
Lovers
Original Video
http://www.youtube.c...h?v=SS16DF_K29Y
Official Trailer
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NMC1FhSZGhk
Bonus Trailers
Jay & Eunjung’s Backstory:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxAFoE58pb0
P R O L O G U E
It was supposed to be just another morning.
The chill of the night before begin to slowly fade away with the approaching sun, spilling light over the sleepy town with its rich rays of warmth.
It was the twelfth day of March. A day when everyone would wake up to go to work, like they did the day before, like they would the day after. A day that no one would think about again, letting it nonchalantly pass them by as quickly as possible, not caring at all.
Today was nothing special, nothing worth remembering, and yet this was a day Kim Heechul had been thinking about for days... no, weeks.
The darkness in the room was filled with a dim, amber glow from the light seeping through the drawn curtains. It was too early for him to be awake, almost three hours before he was supposed to get ready for work. He laid on his back with his head turned over his left shoulder towards the window, his eyelids flickering gently every now and then from the light that was growing stronger. Heechul frowned in his sleep and inhaled deeply. His bare chest rose and fell as his lungs took in the first breath on the morning. It caused him pain, jolting him from his sleep. Heechul let out a soft groan and shifted his head from side to side, his left hand unconsciously moving to the space beside him on the bed.
But it was empty.
Slowly, his eyes opened to see the white ceiling bathed in dawn’s light. A shadow passed through for a second, causing his gaze to then drift down to towards the wall. His eyes were still misty from sleep, his mind still in a daze that everything felt like a dream. A figure stood with her back towards him, hovering over the mirror on the way as she adjusted her long silky hair into a ponytail. Heechul blinked twice before he found himself rising from the bed.
“Boa,” he muttered. The girl turned to look at him over her shoulder.
While his eyes were still struggling to stay open and his hair was matted, her face was radiating with such beauty that Heechul felt warmth in his heart just from meeting her eyes. Her lips smiled sheepishly as she released her hands from her hair.
“Go back to sleep,” she whispered. Her voice was soft, but he knew she was urging him. The words didn’t register, and Heechul sat up. Rubbing his eyes, his mind suddenly became alert as he caught sight of her suitcase beside the bed.
“A... are you leaving now?” he asked, unable to stop his voice from stuttering. He staggered up from the bed, but she turned back to the mirror, avoiding his eyes. She began to hum a light tune to herself as she examined her face.
From behind her, Heechul wrapped his two arms warmly around her waist, holding her close into his body, both gently and firmly, as if not wanting to let go. He kissed her head tenderly, his breath at her neck, taking in the scent of her hair that smelt like flowers. Boa began and swayed from side to side in his embrace, playfully trying to push his arms away.
“Oppa, don’t hold me so tightly,” she laughed, ignoring the sadness that suddenly filled the room. Her single silvery laughter echoed through the silence, all that Heechul could hear. He stared at the reflection in the mirror before them, watching as Boa laughed and attempt to overcome his strong arms, as if it were merely a game they were playing on one of their dates. The only difference was that Heechul remembered he was laughing with her.
At her cuteness, at her charm, at her touch.
At his love.
Right now... he didn’t even remember why he knew laughter in the first place.
“Alright,” Boa said with a sigh. She stopped struggling and relaxed her body, placing her hands over his. “Come on. Go back to bed.” She smiled again and they both looked at the mirror together; she was smiling with her eyes and lips, her dimples deep in her cheeks despite only smiling softly. Heechul could tell, there wasn’t any sadness in her body right now. He could tell from her eyes.
She was happy, her doe eyes shimmered with all the happiness in the world, of anticipation and excitement. She didn’t want to show it, Heechul could tell. Her eyes and lips were different, she was suppressing her feelings as much as possible. For him.
Her happiness... it caused him more pain than anything in the world.
“You were going to leave without saying goodbye?” The words passed through his lips without Heechul even realizing, but they stung so much at his heart. Boa leaned her head back onto his shoulder, exposing her long neck and sharp jawline, with that small smile whenever she couldn’t answer one of his questions right away.
“I wanted you to sleep,” she muttered. Boa raised her hand up to Heechul’s cheek and patted it lightly. “Since today is your big unveiling at the hospital, I thought it was too early to wake you up.” A shadow of emotion passed through her eyes before she abruptly pulled out of his embrace. Diving away from the mirror, she stepped away from him like it was nothing and immediately gathered the leftover items that hadn’t been packed yet.
“Aigoo, what a mess,” she sighed. Heechul remained rigid to his spot, his arms still out in front of him from where Boa slipped out, her words still burning through his mind.
She almost left without saying goodbye. This... what was he to her now?
A car outside honked its horn loudly, ripping Heechul out of his thoughts. His heart raced at his throat, suddenly realizing it was calling out for Boa.
“Ahjussi, I’m coming!” Boa shouted at the opening window. Through the hovering curtains, Heechul saw a taxi waiting outside, a man standing beside it, throwing his first cigarette onto the ground and lighting his second one. He seemed like he could wait for a little while longer. Maybe just a little while longer.
Heechul turned back to face the girl who was leaving and was taken by surprise when he saw her completely packed. Standing in front of him, her backpack over her shoulder, her hair neatly tied up, the suitcase in her hand. It really struck him now, even harder than before.
He felt like his lungs had shrunk, not taking in any air, even though his breath became heavier and heavier at the sight. Boa cautiously took two steps towards him again, smiling and tilting her head to the side in a cute manner.
“Oppa,” she cooed. She cupped his jaw, stroking his cheek with her thumb. “You promised you wouldn’t be sad.”
“Let me drive you to the airport,” he insisted, taking her wrist.
“No,” she told him.
“Send the taxi away and I’ll take you.” Boa shook her head again, her eyes showed no awareness of the pain that throbbed in Heechul’s heart.
“Oppa...”
“Please, let me,” he begged.
“No,” she said again, this time unable to mask the frustration in her voice. She withdrew her hand quickly, perhaps only now sensing what he wanted. “I have to go now.”
“No, you don’t,” Heechul said forcefully. “You don’t have to go now.”
“Yes, I do,” Boa replied calmly. She reached up onto her tiptoe and planted a kiss on his cheek. With a sweep of her ponytail, she ducked down to avoid his gaze and headed straight for the door. Her smile disappeared as soon as she turned away, no longer wanting to waste another second.
A hand shot out and grabbed her wrist, stopping her again. Boa emitted a sigh and closed her eyes.
“Just stay a little longer,” Heechul’s voice pleaded. “Please.”
Boa glanced over her shoulder at him, her eyes slowly moving from his neck and up to his eyes, locking them with hers. She saw the anguish and desperate, even his touch felt like that of a man who was about to lose the most dear possession in his life, but she still shook her head.
“I’ve already given you last night,” she told him. “That’s all I can give you, you already knew that.” Heechul looked away.
They both knew. Boa had waited for this day to come. Heechul had dreaded it.
Boa had been hoping to get the job of her dreams for months on end. Her career, as she said, was at a turning point, and that this job was the one thing she needed to fulfill everything she worked for. Heechul knew how important it was to her, how happy it made her. He prayed with her that she would get it, but at the same time he prayed that she wouldn’t get it. So that maybe, just maybe she would stay with him.
She finally got the job, but that meant that she had to leave for Japan. Maybe for a year, ten years, twenty years. Maybe for good, she wouldn’t say.
It wasn’t the hurt of her leaving. It wasn’t the distance or time apart they’d be from each other. Heechul didn’t need any of that, as long as he knew she was in his heart and he was in hers.
All these months of waiting to know if she would leave, what hurt the most was that she was leaving without any hesitations. No thoughts, no regrets, no sadness that she was leaving him behind. In a blink of an eye, she seemed to have forgotten the years they spent with each other, sharing their own private world of dreams, memories and love.
And the part that hurt him the most wasn’t that she didn’t remember, it was because she didn’t even seem to mind at all.
The car outside beeped again, more urgently, pulling Heechul back into the harsh reality again. He realized he had let go of Boa’s arm. She smiled again.
“Be good while I’m gone.” She glanced at the alarm clock on the bedside table.
06:13AM.
“It’s still really early, so try to get some sleep before your big day.” She beamed and raised her hand for a high-five. Heechul turned away without a word, finding himself unable to reply or even look at her. Boa’s smile disappeared and she dropped her hand, just watching as he moved back towards the bed. The sound of the taxi’s frantic beeping didn’t cause either of them to flinch this time. Heechul sat down and stared indifferently at the alarm clock.
It was set to ring at 8:00AM. He had thought he was driving her there, so he wanted to make sure he woke up on time. He lightly brushed off the dust on the clock with his fingers.
“You’re not coming back, are you?” he muttered. He waited, but Boa didn’t answer straight away. The taxi beeped again.
“I don’t know,” she said after a moment. He heard her sigh again, a rustle of her clothes as she pushed her hair back. Heechul continued to keep his half-closed eyes on the dust particles on his fingers.
“Oppa?” she began. He didn’t reply. “You don’t have to wait for me, okay?”
Again, Heechul didn’t reply or show any signs that he heard her.
“Hey!! Hurry up in there!” the taxi driver shouted.
“I’m coming!” Boa’s voice said. The sound of her feet quickly but carefully pattering on the wooden floor with the wheel of her luggage behind her, as they faded away, Heechul heard the front door open and then slam shut, Boa’s feet now running on the cold hard concrete footpath outside.
“Yah, what took so long?”
“I’m sorry, just forgot a few things. Could you help me with this?”
The sound of the engine started, stalled and then drove off. As the last sound gradually dissolved back into silence, Heechul let out a choked gasp as the weight of the truth crushed him like a tonne of bricks. He lowered his head into his hands, taking breath after breath, a bitter taste rising in his mouth.
She told him not to wait.
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Kim Jaejoong stood among his colleagues on a platform stage before one of Seoul’s most prestigious hospitals. In front of him was a group of perhaps 50 people, watching the team with respect and pending interest. Behind him, was a large monument covered by a sheet, ready to be unveiled.
Usually not so nervous at these kinds of events, Jaejoong had been made to wear a plastic helmet, despite having no use for it. He stood with his hands behind his back and his gaze on the wooden plank in front of his shoes, the helmet lowering down over his eyes so that no one would notice he wasn’t paying attention as his boss Mr Kang was giving out a speech a few feet away.
“... demonstrating extreme dedication to his work...” he heard Mr Kang’s dull voice echoing through the loud speakers set up around the crowd. Jaejoong glanced carefully over his shoulder at the shadow cast over him by the monument. He quickly looked at his watch, sighing as his eyes scanned across the audience for a single face. At the people beside him, at the people in the crowd, hoping to spot that one person that was needed the most right now.
“Come on, hyung...” he breathed through his teeth. He looked at his watch again. “Come on...”
“...and so with great honour, I’ll now reveal the monument that was crafted from the very heart of our young architects, given specifically as a gift with all funds contributing to the children’s ward,” the voice suddenly became enthusiastic and, consequently, a lot louder, giving Jaejoong a shock. The audience started clapping as Jaejoong and his colleagues on the stage instinctively turned around, just in time to see as the huge velvet cover being dragged down dramatically. Jaejoong first had to lift up his helmet, the sun glazing into his eyes.
As if it were a dream, the light gleamed onto the tip of the monument, making it sparkle as if it was a gift made by gods. The cover landed on the ground, now forgotten, and a loud “Ooh!!” escaped from the crowd, and many started clapping.
It was a water fountain. 5 metres tall, having been carved out of inspiration with Michelangelo in mind. The detailing of the pearl-white stone basin was incredible, hand-carved with love and care, creating smooth edges and several patterns. The brim was flat, and the pool was big enough for people to want to throw coins in and make a wish, but small enough not to encourage adventurous children to want to jump in. However, it was the fountain that was the most spectacular.
With a wave to signal the water to be turned on, a second later the oohs transformed into aahs when the audience was given an amazing view of the fountain in motion.
6 fountains, each paralleling the other in a way that created a spherical effect as the streams of water intertwined. A heart shape; not merely a flat outline that could only be viewed from one angle, but a prism. With the white light installed for it to be seen at night, it looked like a crystal heart.
While the others awed and applauded the magnificent specimen, Jaejoong couldn’t bring himself to even smile, half-heartedly clapping along with his eyes boring at the fountain from one corner to the other. Flawless, really flawless. This was the most impressive project he had yet to be part of, but he couldn’t help but feel disappointed.
“As you can see, the heart prism represents our architect designer’s heart, as he has stated,” Mr Kang went on. “Our designer worked tediously for months on end to get the exact image right the way he imagined.” The speakers rustled a little as Mr Kang looked over at Jaejoong and the other architects. “Perhaps it would be clearer if the designer himself came forward and explained it. Ladies and gentlemen, having accomplished such a masterpiece after just one year into his career, the man behind this extremely gracious artefact, Kim Heechul!”
The crowd roared this time, and Jaejoong was surprised to see that among them were some of the children in the hospital. His heart sank as his eyes caught sight of a bald girl in a wheelchair, clapping the hardest with a smile spread across her face. The clapping quickly fell into confusion when Heechul was nowhere in sight. The architects glanced around at each other, not knowing what to do. Jaejoong took a deep breath, his helmet still down over his eyes, and forwarded over to Mr Kang at the speaker stand. He whispered a few things in his ear, Mr Kang’s expression turned from puzzlement to disappointment to relief to acknowledgment. He leaned back over to the microphone.
“Ah, apparently Kim Heechul couldn’t be here,” he said. “So, speaking on his behalf is his colleague Kim Jaejoong.”
Jaejoong gave Mr Kang a grateful nod as he stepped down, allowing Jaejoong to speak. He cleared his throat nervously and lifted up his helmet. He took a moment first, again feeling disappointed that he had to be the one making a speech instead of Heechul. He remembered what Heechul said he wanted to say at the opening, he had written it out a month ago and had rehearsed it in front of him. Jaejoong struggled to remember it, to remember the happiness that was in Heechul’s voice due to the excitement of this event, but Jaejoong knew it was a different matter altogether now. Today.
“Kim Heechul-sshi wanted to build something that represented his feelings and his love for his work,” Jaejoong said. “The main point of this fountain, of the water heart...” He pointed aimlessly at the fountain behind him. “...the main point is to encourage the children who look at it and play around it to believe in love and have hope to keep fighting, to grow up and learn of different kinds of love. Love from your family, love from your friends, to gather strength in order to smile and find happiness for the future.” Jaejoong paused and bit into his lip, not sure whether or not he should say the next bit.
“As the water rises and falls, the heart takes shape. When the water stops, the heart disappears. It’s the same with love and falling in love. Without it, the heart would stop beating and there would be no hope. That’s why so much care was put into the fountain, so that it would flow for as long as the hospital will stand.”
A loud cheer followed the end of the speech, mostly from the children. Jaejoong managed a smile because of this. He raised a fist and shouted “Fighting!” the children got even more excited, and they were allowed to finally go over and play around it. Jaejoong stepped back, congratulated by Mr Kang with a handshake and pat on the back. Everyone started to head over to the food stands for the hospital picnic, probably also discussing about the fountain that would now be the main attraction at the front of the hospital. Jaejoong took off the helmet and placed it on a table, digging his hands deep into his pockets. A loud whooshing noise directed his attention straight up at a Japan Airways plane flew across the field. It was so close to the ground that Jaejoong had to hold down his black hair with one hand to avoid the wild rush of wind from under the wings.
He knew Boa was on that plane, and he knew she wasn’t going to come back.
As the wind caressed across the fountain, the water heart jolted out of shape for a few seconds under the shadow of the plane. Jaejoong sighed again, shaking his head.
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Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.
The sound of a blunt object hitting against a smooth surface could be heard throughout the house, since it was so quiet.
Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.
Each hit, each bump, the side of Heechul’s head continued to bang itself against the wall as his body slumped against it, ignoring the throbbing pain that had been numbed due to the pain in his heart.
Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.
Jaejoong could even hear it as he approached Heechul’s house. Taking out his spare key, he observed the empty parking space in the corner which had been reserved for Boa’s car for the last two years. Even just seeing it, Jaejoong knew how much of an impact it would be on Heechul. The thumping went on and on, even after Jaejoong opened the door. Heechul heard the noise of the door closing and the footsteps that stealthy moved into the house, but it didn’t seem to affect the rhythmic pattern of the thumping at all.
He was hoping it was a burglar who would come in and kill him.
“Hyung,” Jaejoong called out, poking his head into each room. “Where are you?”
Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.
Jaejoong reached the last room in the house; Heechul’s study room. He pushed the door open and peered in, immediately seeing Heechul beside his desk on his knees, the wooden thumping even louder than before. Jaejoong rushed to his friend and pulled him away from the wall.
“Hyung, stop it!” he exclaimed. Heechul was in a daze, his body limp. Jaejoong exhaled heavily, cupping the side of Heechul’s head, checking to see if he was bleeding or not. Thankfully it hadn’t bled, but there was a huge swollen bump. Heechul’s neck gave way almost in an instant, collapsing onto Jaejoong’s shoulder. His glassy eyes didn’t even flicker, the thumping taking its effect on his mind and body.
“Come on, hyung,” Jaejoong urged, letting out a grunt as he tried to heaving him up onto his feet. “Come on, stop faking and get up.”
Heechul blinked and came out from his trance. Still dizzy, he used his left leg for support to help Jaejoong get him to stand up. He groaned as the pain from the bump spread like wildfire. Jaejoong laughed mirthlessly.
“Yeah, that probably wasn’t such a good idea,” he said, wrapping Heechul’s arm around his neck. Heechul even managed to laugh a little at that. Jaejoong smiled.
“I’ll buy you a drink, okay?”
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Heechul flipped his head backwards as he downed his 6th shot. Jaejoong sat beside him with a beer, watching with his chin rested on his fist.
They were at a nightclub now, a place where the two of them were able to escape the daily traumas of their lives, and just relax and drink. It was a regular ritual for Jaejoong, but because before Heechul had been dating Boa for a long time, he rarely went anywhere without her, and she refused to go drinking with them.
Heechul exhaled sharply and slammed the glass onto the table.
“Bartender, gimme another shot!” he exclaimed. The bartender quickly refilled the glass, and Heechul downed it again. Jaejoong sipped his beer, a disapproving look on his face.
“You knew this day was coming,” he remarked ruefully. Heechul slammed the glass on the table again, but didn’t call out for another one. He stared at the wall for a moment, breathing hard from the effects of the alcohol.
“She told me not to wait for her, Jaejoong ah,” he gave out. His voice was softer now, almost as if saying those words too loudly would rip his throat out. “She told me not to wait...”
“Then don’t wait,” Jaejoong said with a firm tone. He set down his bottle and roughly shook Heechul by the shoulder. “You need to wake up. This “girl of your dreams“ has left you. You know how Boa was, she isn’t the kind who could give her heart to someone completely.” Heechul shook his head.
“No...” he muttered.
“Hyung, open your eyes,” Jaejoong told him. “Boa loved her work too much, she even told you that. Is it that hard to accept that she’d choose her career over you? The only reason she was with you for so long was because you held onto her so tightly.” He patted Heechul’s shoulder. “That wasn’t love.”
“You don’t know anything about love,” Heechul said darkly. Jaejoong scoffed, turning back to his beer.
“I know what love isn’t,” he said matter-of-factly. He took another sip, looking over to a few pretty girls at the other side of the bar before turning his attention back to his best friend.
“Look, are you going to just pine over Boa, now that she’s gone?” he asked. “Don’t do that, don’t waste your life regretting so much when you have so much to be happy about right now.” Jaejoong nudged him. “Your very first project got accepted by a major hospital! Aren’t you happy?”
Heechul nibbled on his empty glass.
“You’re 23 years old, the youngest architect to get that honour, and in your first year too!!”
Heechul shrugged.
“I guess that’s a good point,” he said, considering it for a moment.
“And you’ve just become an uncle. Shouldn’t you show your new nephew that you’re better than this and live up to your reputation?”
“Well... yeah.”
“Forget Boa,” Jaejoong said, his voice lowering drastically. So drastically that Heechul looked over at him. He saw the pleading in his friend’s eyes.
“She’s gone. She won’t come back, even if she said she would. That’s just the person she is. Don’t give up on everything just because of her.” Jaejoong empathized his point by hitting the table with his hand. “Don’t think about her anymore. Don’t even say her name. Just forget everything about Kwon Boa and move on.”
Heechul smiled sadly to himself and glanced back down at his glass. He set it on its side and spun it, watching as it swirled on the flat surface, becoming a circle shape that reflected off his hurtful eyes.
“Forget everything about her,” he whispered. The glass spun and spun, until it finally stopped. Heechul chuckled to himself, then stood up. Straightening his jacket, his gaze drifted over to the group of girls beside the bar, and he noticed that they kept glancing over at him and Jaejoong. To his surprise when he looked back at Jaejoong, he was already talking to another girl, so it turned out that the girls were just looking at him now.
His body still numb from the shock, dampened by the effects of the alcohol, Heechul went over to the other side, his eyes on the prettiest girl standing right in the centre of her group. He watched as they started talking excitedly among themselves as he approached, the usual butterflies he would get from seeing a beautiful woman never came, he felt his heart harden itself and a soothing, cool sensation overtake the inside of his throat. He stopped in front of the girl to examine her features.
Her beauty was nothing compared to Boa, but she had the same hair, and the same dimples.
He wanted her.
“Do you want to dance with me?” he asked in a cold voice. The girl giggled nonetheless and gladly agreed. He took her hand and led her to the dance floor, where all the lights flashing vigorously caused his head to hurt, his pulse throbbing in the bump.
But he didn’t care. He danced, close to her, his hands around her waist, her chest pressed against his, her breath on his lips. He didn’t even know her name, but he wanted her. All the anger in his soul, erupting through his dance, to feel her body moving against him to the music, her touch, her breath, her scent.
He wanted it. He wanted it so badly.
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The siren rang over and over again. Flashes of red and blue dashed through the blackness of the night, stopping traffic in its track in order to rush to the emergency room immediately. The air flowed with the suffocating smell of ashes, flames and burnt rubble; even the cold night could not fight against the powerful flames of a fire.
The ambulance came to a halt in front of a hospital, the paramedics frantically pulling out the single victim out onto a carrier, pushing it as fast as possible to the ER.
Doctors who spotted the incoming patient instantly went over to help. The carrier was going so fast, one female doctor could only keep up by running, at the same time looking through the charts given by the paramedics.
“What happened?” she said breathilly, flipping through the notes.
“16 year old girl,” the paramedic told her. “Her house set fire while she was asleep in her room. We managed to pull her out, but she suffered third degree burns to her back and lower body.”
“Third degree burns?” the doctor gasped, fearing the worst. She lifted up the girl’s tattered shirt, only to see nothing but blood.
“There was another person in the house,” the paramedic went on. “Her father, I think. We’ve put out the fire but we think it was caused by some electricity problem in the kitchen. Her father might have tried to save her but was overcome by the flames.”
“He perished?”
“We still haven’t been able to recover the body yet, but there’s no way he could have survived. My guys think that it was because he was trying to save her, going over to that direction from his room. It was a really dangerous situation. The whole house was almost completely burnt to the ground. It’s a miracle she survived at all.”
“But these scars...” the doctor began, examining the gorey wounds. “From this much tissue damage, if she even lives through the night would be the miracle.”
They arrived at the emergency room and the surgeons quickly took the girl off the carrier onto the operating table. The girl began to moan under the oxygen mask.
“......Appa...... a...... appa...... ap...... a......”
The paramedic stood back and observed as the surgeons got to work. The doctor slipped on her gloves as they watched the girl’s moans subside after being injected with a strong anesthetic.
“Have you called her family?” she asked. The paramedic nodded grimly. “What’s the girl’s name?”
“Ahn Sohee.”
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CHARACTERS INTRODUCED:
Heechul (Super Junior)
BoA
Jaejoong (TVXQ)
Sohee (Wonder Girls)