Talk amongst yourselves while I try to figure it out
It's not a problem, really. Not a problem, just one of those things that causes me worry (which of course is most of the things I do in life, but whatever). This is premature worry too, yet I worry anyway. The anticipation of heartbreak is one of my fortes.
The situation: Baret and I are just a big question mark. We talk once a week, sometimes more, via MySpace IM. We email and, to my delight, have even now begun to correspond by snail mail. We discussed the fact that our relationship wasn't about "waiting" for the other person, especially when I've gone so far from her. I am happy knowing that we will be together at some point in our lives, when we're both ready, and I will maintain that belief until it happens.
It follows, of course, that I've met someone here. I'm pretty much counting on having my heart broken by beautiful, freckled, Scottish Mairi, but we hooked up last night and it was great. She's funny, spunky, intelligent, and she's SCOTTISH. I think there is a chance of us seeing more of each other, although I'm trying not to invest too much of my heart. Timing often fucks up my chances of relationships (I know I'm not the only one), so I'm sure even if she was as interested as I was the fact that I'm leaving will deter her. This of course means I'm worrying about it for no reason.
I guess, what I'm trying to say is I don't necessarily feel *guilty* about this, but I also know I'm not going to announce to Baret that I've met someone else. My feelings for Mairi don't affect my feelings for Baret in the slightest--plus, we all know I can't venture into ANY new situation and not throw my heart at someone's feet.
I'm not sure I want advice because I'm doing what I think is best--and I'm LIVING my life abroad. But if someone has thoughts she wants to share, feel free...
(Also, rigela, if you still read this, I appreciated your response to my comment about airlines. I hope you are well; I realize I missed wishing you a happy birthday and I'm sorry about that, I meant to. So, happy very belated birthday.)
The situation: Baret and I are just a big question mark. We talk once a week, sometimes more, via MySpace IM. We email and, to my delight, have even now begun to correspond by snail mail. We discussed the fact that our relationship wasn't about "waiting" for the other person, especially when I've gone so far from her. I am happy knowing that we will be together at some point in our lives, when we're both ready, and I will maintain that belief until it happens.
It follows, of course, that I've met someone here. I'm pretty much counting on having my heart broken by beautiful, freckled, Scottish Mairi, but we hooked up last night and it was great. She's funny, spunky, intelligent, and she's SCOTTISH. I think there is a chance of us seeing more of each other, although I'm trying not to invest too much of my heart. Timing often fucks up my chances of relationships (I know I'm not the only one), so I'm sure even if she was as interested as I was the fact that I'm leaving will deter her. This of course means I'm worrying about it for no reason.
I guess, what I'm trying to say is I don't necessarily feel *guilty* about this, but I also know I'm not going to announce to Baret that I've met someone else. My feelings for Mairi don't affect my feelings for Baret in the slightest--plus, we all know I can't venture into ANY new situation and not throw my heart at someone's feet.
I'm not sure I want advice because I'm doing what I think is best--and I'm LIVING my life abroad. But if someone has thoughts she wants to share, feel free...
(Also, rigela, if you still read this, I appreciated your response to my comment about airlines. I hope you are well; I realize I missed wishing you a happy birthday and I'm sorry about that, I meant to. So, happy very belated birthday.)