hear my thoughts in every note

[lovefloats]

this is how i envision it'll all go down.

at the airport i spot you.
i feel my tummy turn,
and i can't stop to think if its fear, or excitement, or hope, or butterflies.
i've no time,
because all that matters is you're finally here.

i say something flirty, enough to make you grin,
and just enough to remember how much you've missed me.
and then i'll hug you,
because i've wanted that for so long,
holding you so tight,
as i breathe you in,
a scent once familiar,
and its the closest to the intimacy we once shared.
and then i kiss you,
except
you kiss me first,
and i feel my tummy settle,
the butterflies placated,
because all that matters is that you're back,
even if its just for now.

this is what i think will actually happen.

its the day i know you're arriving.
i want to go see you at the airport,
but you didn't ask,
and that's another excuse that has stopped me from going.
so i'm home,
maybe out with friends,
but my mind's at the airport.
i do not hug you,
you forget.
i do not kiss you,
you do not remember.

you then get enveloped by family and friends,
and i wait, because i've too much pride,
and am embarrassed,
because absence makes the heart forget.
you may come meet me,
or maybe you won't,
and my nights are still spent alone.
i built months of expectations,
and so disappointment hits me hard
and it hurts.
but i can't stop hoping,
because all that matters is that you're back,
even if its just for now.