Hello there
Yeah I am back in town and trying to motivate myself into cleaning my room. If you have ever seen my room.....you still aint seen nothin. Yeah its at its all time low...or high if we are measuring the highest peak of junk. So between that and "trying to find a job" I have been busy/bored. I am pretty much guaranteed a job back at Bed Bath And Beyond, the problem is, I dont think I will be getting many hours, I want to work full time...just not there. I like the place and all....but spending more than 36 hours in that place a week just seems like the most boring thing to me, the people are great there and I love the atmosphere...just dont dig the way it makes me feel most times.
Moving on. Remember that meltdown I had a little while back? Thought it was over huh? Not at all. Even after passing this semester I have doubts even when I thought my passion for becoming a vet were renewed. Yeah so I have been yelling and screaming at myself for a while. I have been doing this thing for a very long time where I keep asking God to tell me what to do, what my damn purpose is...why is it sooo important that I am here. I dont get an answer from him...or I may not be listening closely enough. But I always ask Him after that to kill me if my purpose was served...and yet I still live. SO apparently I have SOMETHING here to do, even if it is miniscule and does not produce a career.
Here is my theory at present though about my doubts of major. Perhaps I keep having this reoccuring doubt because it is in fact not what I am meant to do. So I am beginning to think that perhaps I should drop the Pre-Vet major and turn all my focus onto Biology. Cuz I really do like Biology, in fact it is one of the classes that I feel I can really excell at. I dont know if it will allow my lifelong dream of working with Elephants, but if I pick the right job, or even do odds and ends, I can acomplish working with elephants eventually and better yet do what I tell myself I MUST do....Travel for my job.
I started my Herb garden and it is ok...I lost some sprouts but I can gain them back....if the recent rain does not drown them. I have parsley, basil, sage, and a few more that I replanted. I have not started to attempt skatboarding yet, that is a scary prospect, especially with the wet ground. I have not gone to volunteer yet since being home, I have to email a few people and get things sorted out.
I dont know what I am gonna do for my b-day...but I guess a repeat of past birthdays is quite alright. ^_^ I always find something. If you forgot, WATCH THE SEASON FINALE OF HEROES ON NBC AT 9 ON MONDAY!!!!! Oh and check out this new show called BloodTies on tuesday night 10 lifetime...its knifty!
Moving on. Remember that meltdown I had a little while back? Thought it was over huh? Not at all. Even after passing this semester I have doubts even when I thought my passion for becoming a vet were renewed. Yeah so I have been yelling and screaming at myself for a while. I have been doing this thing for a very long time where I keep asking God to tell me what to do, what my damn purpose is...why is it sooo important that I am here. I dont get an answer from him...or I may not be listening closely enough. But I always ask Him after that to kill me if my purpose was served...and yet I still live. SO apparently I have SOMETHING here to do, even if it is miniscule and does not produce a career.
Here is my theory at present though about my doubts of major. Perhaps I keep having this reoccuring doubt because it is in fact not what I am meant to do. So I am beginning to think that perhaps I should drop the Pre-Vet major and turn all my focus onto Biology. Cuz I really do like Biology, in fact it is one of the classes that I feel I can really excell at. I dont know if it will allow my lifelong dream of working with Elephants, but if I pick the right job, or even do odds and ends, I can acomplish working with elephants eventually and better yet do what I tell myself I MUST do....Travel for my job.
I started my Herb garden and it is ok...I lost some sprouts but I can gain them back....if the recent rain does not drown them. I have parsley, basil, sage, and a few more that I replanted. I have not started to attempt skatboarding yet, that is a scary prospect, especially with the wet ground. I have not gone to volunteer yet since being home, I have to email a few people and get things sorted out.
I dont know what I am gonna do for my b-day...but I guess a repeat of past birthdays is quite alright. ^_^ I always find something. If you forgot, WATCH THE SEASON FINALE OF HEROES ON NBC AT 9 ON MONDAY!!!!! Oh and check out this new show called BloodTies on tuesday night 10 lifetime...its knifty!