why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.....i really am angry...i dont understand why god is doing this to me...i he trying to see if me and josh can stay together.Is it a test ..like if josh and julie can manage to stay together they can get married and have kids..bs i dont need this in my life right now..im in love ...deep emotional love..im mean i would die for him..i would give him everything within me.....but i cant lose him right now..i love him to much...and every time i think about him leaving me i go into tears ....i mean im crying right now. the truth is i dont know what i will do if josh goes..i have a feeling i will be real depressed..i mean really really depressed...why did god do this..was it to teach me something.. cause right now it feels like my heart was ripped out..well i gotta go.....