Dude. I'm away from my computer for a day and I miss three chapters of this awesome fic? Guh!
Awesome as always. I would comment more but it is very late and my neurons aren't firing as well as usual.
The smut was all kids of hot, and after all of the build up, the years passing, it was as satisfying for the reader as it was for Logan and Veronica.
Veronica's hurried exit, and Logan's misinterpretation of it were totally expected, and totally heartbreaking. I'm so proud of your Logan for not drinking, for calling Keith and getting to a meeting. (Unlike the result we would have seen on TV, where prolonging the drama makes for good television.)
But this was my favorite line: Now he just had to figure out the next step of winning Veronica back. Because this means that instead of writing Veronica off completely, escalating the misunderstanding and hurt, that they both can maybe finally talk some things out and get past the misunderstandings for once.
But: "AD Jackson will support me, " she half prayed, half pleaded in her head. "She
( ... )
This chapter hurt so badly, bu in the best way for this story. Things has been perfect and then they fell apart.
Logan's call to Keith is really a testiment to how comfortable Logan has become with the older man and how much Logan really is already part of the Mars family. If only Veronica would stop being so obsessed about work and really look at her friends, things might be better.
Logan's trip to AA was also really emotional. He opened up and really said how broken he was by this night with Veronica. He did need the "emotional shit" to be discussed or mentioned before Veronica left.
Quick catch--you have the times reversed on the time zones. New York is three hours earlier than CA. If it's 5 AM in New York, it's 2 AM in Neptune. I can't tell if Keith really wants a 2 AM phone call about this, but it makes the situation more powerful and immediate.
THis is a great chapter - a good balance between veronica's and logan's perspective. I really like how you added the mystery because it really has enhanced an already excellent piece of fic. The mysery at this stage still seems a bit abstract and I don't really feel involved in trying to solve the mystery yet. Perhaps a more detailed look at a case or more details of veronica's thought processed to involve the reader. But this is seriously an excellent and well written fic. Look forward to your updates.
2 chapters in one night! You're awesome! :) I loved this chapter...man...that AA meeting got to me...got me all teary eyed... I had a feeling he'd react badly to her just leaving...I LOVE KEITH! Oh..and I love that Logan said "Love you" when he hung up the phone...awww..it made you want to just hug him! I love your writing! Can't wait to read more!
Glad you liked the "Love you." I wondered if it was a little over the top... I think there is going to have to be a point where V is really jealous and wonders if he wants her for herself or for teh family unit she provides. I don't know. But I just love Keith and Logan needed someone like that.
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Awesome as always. I would comment more but it is very late and my neurons aren't firing as well as usual.
The smut was all kids of hot, and after all of the build up, the years passing, it was as satisfying for the reader as it was for Logan and Veronica.
Veronica's hurried exit, and Logan's misinterpretation of it were totally expected, and totally heartbreaking. I'm so proud of your Logan for not drinking, for calling Keith and getting to a meeting. (Unlike the result we would have seen on TV, where prolonging the drama makes for good television.)
But this was my favorite line:
Now he just had to figure out the next step of winning Veronica back.
Because this means that instead of writing Veronica off completely, escalating the misunderstanding and hurt, that they both can maybe finally talk some things out and get past the misunderstandings for once.
But:
"AD Jackson will support me, " she half prayed, half pleaded in her head. "She ( ... )
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Glad you are enjoying...
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This chapter hurt so badly, bu in the best way for this story. Things has been perfect and then they fell apart.
Logan's call to Keith is really a testiment to how comfortable Logan has become with the older man and how much Logan really is already part of the Mars family. If only Veronica would stop being so obsessed about work and really look at her friends, things might be better.
Logan's trip to AA was also really emotional. He opened up and really said how broken he was by this night with Veronica. He did need the "emotional shit" to be discussed or mentioned before Veronica left.
Quick catch--you have the times reversed on the time zones. New York is three hours earlier than CA. If it's 5 AM in New York, it's 2 AM in Neptune. I can't tell if Keith really wants a 2 AM phone call about this, but it makes the situation more powerful and immediate.
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I am trying to show them starting to fall in the same patterns, but then catching themselves. Glad you saw that.
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Great chapter!!!
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...so sad.... poor logan... stupid veronica.....
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