(no subject)
An interesting thought...
I do not feel very eating disordered anymore. For the past three days I have been eating perfectly healthily in order to lose weight, and have not purged or considered purging once. Before that, I had been overeating and throwing up a fair amount - but none of the disordered thoughts were there. I overate as many overweight people do, and I purged because I didn't like feeling full. I don't hate my body; I only dislike it because I am overweight so I feel fat and unhealthy, but there is no irrational loathing. I feel that if I lost thirty pounds or so, I could learn to like it.
I am of course aware that the eating disorder could pop back any minute. I have been very healthy for the past few days, but I know that I must not let myself fall into undereating, because hunger always leads to binging and purging. I am not for a second thinking that I am recovered for life, but for now, I feel quite content.
I do not feel very eating disordered anymore. For the past three days I have been eating perfectly healthily in order to lose weight, and have not purged or considered purging once. Before that, I had been overeating and throwing up a fair amount - but none of the disordered thoughts were there. I overate as many overweight people do, and I purged because I didn't like feeling full. I don't hate my body; I only dislike it because I am overweight so I feel fat and unhealthy, but there is no irrational loathing. I feel that if I lost thirty pounds or so, I could learn to like it.
I am of course aware that the eating disorder could pop back any minute. I have been very healthy for the past few days, but I know that I must not let myself fall into undereating, because hunger always leads to binging and purging. I am not for a second thinking that I am recovered for life, but for now, I feel quite content.