So a few things jump out at me here. I wouldn't necessarily call them "wrong" in the sense that you have done something harmful to another person, but I do see some problems here.
You seem to have poor personal boundaries, an exaggerated sensitivity to perceived rejection, and codependent approaches to relationships.
Poor personal boundaries: you let people outside you, especially people who are not directly a part of your relationship, affect your happiness and esteem in your relationship. It does not matter what other people say or think. No matter who you are, no matter what you do, there are people who will hate you. You have a choice about whether you allow that inside your own boundaries. If you want a happy and successful life, you must be able to maintain personal boundaries.
Rejection sensitivity: I've been reading a great deal about this lately, because it affects someone in my romantic network. It's a need for acceptance coupled with a hair-trigger perception of rejection, abandonment, or loss, and yes, it will mess you up. One of the hallmarks of rejection sensitivity is the feeling that people owe you a response, often an immediate response, to any attempt you make to reach out to them. In reality, an expectation on your part is never an obligation on someone else's.
Codependence: This really jumped out at me: "He's all I ever wanted, he really is & I love him more then I've ever loved anyone. I would give anything & everything I owned just for his happiness, especially because he has brought me so much happiness in the past few months then I could have ever imagined getting in a single lifetime." You can not sacrifice your happiness for that of another person; that's never healthy. You can't assume that you can't have happiness or aren't worthy of happiness yourself. Trying to sacrifice yourself for someone else's happiness is the foundation of codependency. In reality, healthy relationships say "I will be with him and he will be with me for as long as our relationship makes us both happy."
It seems to me that, yes, the people around you haven't always been kind to you, but also, there's some work you can do on yourself. Doing that work might help you build more stable, happy, loving, intimate relationships.
You seem to have poor personal boundaries, an exaggerated sensitivity to perceived rejection, and codependent approaches to relationships.
Poor personal boundaries: you let people outside you, especially people who are not directly a part of your relationship, affect your happiness and esteem in your relationship. It does not matter what other people say or think. No matter who you are, no matter what you do, there are people who will hate you. You have a choice about whether you allow that inside your own boundaries. If you want a happy and successful life, you must be able to maintain personal boundaries.
Rejection sensitivity: I've been reading a great deal about this lately, because it affects someone in my romantic network. It's a need for acceptance coupled with a hair-trigger perception of rejection, abandonment, or loss, and yes, it will mess you up. One of the hallmarks of rejection sensitivity is the feeling that people owe you a response, often an immediate response, to any attempt you make to reach out to them. In reality, an expectation on your part is never an obligation on someone else's.
Codependence: This really jumped out at me: "He's all I ever wanted, he really is & I love him more then I've ever loved anyone. I would give anything & everything I owned just for his happiness, especially because he has brought me so much happiness in the past few months then I could have ever imagined getting in a single lifetime." You can not sacrifice your happiness for that of another person; that's never healthy. You can't assume that you can't have happiness or aren't worthy of happiness yourself. Trying to sacrifice yourself for someone else's happiness is the foundation of codependency. In reality, healthy relationships say "I will be with him and he will be with me for as long as our relationship makes us both happy."
It seems to me that, yes, the people around you haven't always been kind to you, but also, there's some work you can do on yourself. Doing that work might help you build more stable, happy, loving, intimate relationships.
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