(no subject)
ok, so the following i got in an email from my mom:
WOMEN'S ASS SIZE STUDY
There is a new study out about women and how they feel about their asses! I thought the results were pretty interesting:
85% of women think their ass is too big..
10% of women think their ass is too little...
The other 5% say that they don't care, they love him, he's a good man, and they would have married him anyway.
lol. here is another email from my mom about stupid people:
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the
local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer
Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer were being hit
by cars" and he didn't want them to cross there anymore. This one was
from Kingman, KS.
_______________________________________________________
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked
the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said that he
was sorry, but they had only iceberg. And he was a Kansas City chef!
_______________________________________________________
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport
employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your
knowledge? To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how
would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
Happened in Birmingham, Ala.
_______________________________________________________
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the
street. I was crossing with an intellectually-challenged co-worker of
mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained
that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she
responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a
probation officer in Wichita, KS
_______________________________________________________
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving
the company due to "downsizing," our manager commented
cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not a word
was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that
deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.
_______________________________________________________
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up
our car, we were told that the keys had been locked inside it. We went
to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to
unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was
unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "it's open!" To which
he replied, "I know - I already got that side." This was at the Ford
dealership in Canton, Mississippi!
_______________________________________________________
*and they walk among us ... and REPRODUCE!!!
lol. i dont get the second one for that though... explain it to me if u guys understand it.
WOMEN'S ASS SIZE STUDY
There is a new study out about women and how they feel about their asses! I thought the results were pretty interesting:
85% of women think their ass is too big..
10% of women think their ass is too little...
The other 5% say that they don't care, they love him, he's a good man, and they would have married him anyway.
lol. here is another email from my mom about stupid people:
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the
local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer
Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer were being hit
by cars" and he didn't want them to cross there anymore. This one was
from Kingman, KS.
_______________________________________________________
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked
the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said that he
was sorry, but they had only iceberg. And he was a Kansas City chef!
_______________________________________________________
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport
employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your
knowledge? To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how
would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
Happened in Birmingham, Ala.
_______________________________________________________
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the
street. I was crossing with an intellectually-challenged co-worker of
mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained
that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she
responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a
probation officer in Wichita, KS
_______________________________________________________
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving
the company due to "downsizing," our manager commented
cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not a word
was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that
deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.
_______________________________________________________
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up
our car, we were told that the keys had been locked inside it. We went
to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to
unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was
unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "it's open!" To which
he replied, "I know - I already got that side." This was at the Ford
dealership in Canton, Mississippi!
_______________________________________________________
*and they walk among us ... and REPRODUCE!!!
lol. i dont get the second one for that though... explain it to me if u guys understand it.