(no subject)
okay so i have these moments where i'm extremely depressed and shit and i don't know wht to do to get out of them. i just came home from being in new york for 5 days. it was time much needed with the family even tho me and my sister had it out a couple times. i was happy like the whole freaking time tho. i seriously was. i was crackin on my sister and dad the whole time and my mom just frickin laughed and laughed. and now i'm sitting here by myself and the lonliness is kickin in.
i don't know why it is now...cuz i've been fine for a while. i mean i hear my best friend talkin about her friend/b.f all the time and everything they do and shit..and it just makes me miss everything i ever had. like within the past 3 weeks, i've had 2 blind dates. granted my friends were with me, but nothing came of either one of them. how the hell is that sposta make me feel? i fucking cried the night of one of them in front of the guy...i don't know why..it just sucked ass.
maybe it's cuz i haven't talked to my doctor in two weeks. i don't know...but it's fuckin killin me cuz i hate being like this.
i hate feeling alone
i hate being alone.
i hate it all
:(
i don't know why it is now...cuz i've been fine for a while. i mean i hear my best friend talkin about her friend/b.f all the time and everything they do and shit..and it just makes me miss everything i ever had. like within the past 3 weeks, i've had 2 blind dates. granted my friends were with me, but nothing came of either one of them. how the hell is that sposta make me feel? i fucking cried the night of one of them in front of the guy...i don't know why..it just sucked ass.
maybe it's cuz i haven't talked to my doctor in two weeks. i don't know...but it's fuckin killin me cuz i hate being like this.
i hate feeling alone
i hate being alone.
i hate it all
:(