You Really Don't Care (One Shot)
Title: You Really Don't Care (One Shot)
Author: lov3s
Beta: withlightning
Pairing: Belldom
Rating: R
Words: 899
Warning(s): Alcohol consumption, a little bit of angst.
Feedback: It's what I write for! Well, not exactly but you get what I mean.
Disclaimer: If I were to own Muse, I wouldn't be here relaying my fantasies. But hey, a girl can dream right?
A/N: Filled a prompt for this one! No kate hate! I hope the OP enjoys this! And, thank you, withlightning darling, for helping me beta this. I love you! As for the rest of you, I hope you'll like it. <3
Hey you, see me, pictures crazy
I’ve always been into the party scene. Everybody thought Morgan was the hardcore party guy, but when they do learn about what I did during those parties, Morgan wouldn’t even be remembered. But, they would never know because I will never tell them or let them see me, even. Not that you would care.
It was bad. I was bad. I would leave the club at ungodly hours in the morning, trudge my intoxicated self through the foreign streets and back to the hotel. More often than I’d like to admit, strangers I’ve met while partying had to do the job for me. Sometimes, I wonder what I did for them to bring me back to the hotel. Then again, I don’t think I want to know either.
All the world I've seen before me passing by
I've got nothing, to gain, to lose
I could afford it. I had no responsibilities, no partner to stay faithful to, no family to answer to, not even myself. The management had nothing on me. All I had to do was to be sober enough to play the next gig or whatever it is that they’ve planned. And being sober for that few hours was enough for me to want to go back to being intoxicated; the only time I felt free. Free of hurt, frustration, sadness, emotion. I couldn’t bear it. It was just too much. You were too much.
All the world I've seen before me passing by
*
Before she came along, before I lost you to her, we were inseparable, glued to the hips. You and I went everywhere together, did almost everything together. We even shared a hotel room together, because neither of us could sleep without having the other wrapped up in our arms. No, don’t get me wrong, we weren’t together, together. We weren’t dating or anything, we certainly weren’t a couple. Nothing of such. We were, are, two extremely close friends who’ve spent every waking moment in the last two decades of our lives together. Well, that’s what I tell myself every time, at least.
I wouldn’t say that I was surprised when I realised that I’ve fallen for you. It was only natural, right? The sweet caresses, long warm hugs, kisses on the cheeks, knowing looks, shit-eating grins, getting into trouble together and everything else shared between the both of us.
*
You don't care about how I feel
But all of that has been forgotten, now that you have her. She’s all that you see now, all that you need. You don’t need my arms wrapped around you, you don’t need my sweet caresses, you don’t need my kisses on your cheek, you don’t need me shooting you knowing looks once in a while. To put it simply; you just don’t need me. But how could I ever blame you for that? It wasn’t like as though you knew how I felt about you. You didn’t. So no, I could never blame you for not needing me. For forgetting me.
I don't feel it any more
I don't feel it any more
After the gig today, I decided to give the partying a skip. I bounded straight off the stage after the final riff of Knights, passing crew members by, making a beeline for the dressing room. I packed my things up, put on my leather jacket and headed towards the exit without even bothering to change out of my sweaty stage get up. Another second more I was sure I would die.
All night, I had to deal with her in the wings, taking pictures of you. I could barely concentrate on my drumming. I’m sure I made a few mistakes, given the hard looks you sent my way as I played. Anything to get you to look at me again. Anything for you to remember me.
I managed to reach the exit without having to stop for anyone or any questions about my early escape. I signalled to one of the crew members to get me a cab and also something about not feeling too well. I just missed you, is all.
I don't feel it any more
You don’t care about how I feel
I entered my hotel room and went straight toward the mini bar. I was shaking by then, all those thoughts in my head threatening to swallow me whole. I grabbed whatever came to sight first, unscrewed the cap, throwing my head backwards as the alcohol burned down my throat. A sigh of relief. I gathered whatever they had in the mini bar and brought it to my bed. I stripped off my clothes, grabbing a boxer short and putting it on. Opening another mini bottle and downing whatever it was. I laid back down on the empty bed, staring blankly at the white ceiling. There was a burning at the corners of my eyes but I took no notice. I didn’t want to feel it. I didn’t want to feel you.
It wasn’t long before the small bottles of alcohol were gone. I felt a little woozy in my head, but other than that, I felt free; free of hurt, frustration, sadness, except,
I don't sleep, any more, I don't eat, any more, I don't live, any more
I love you.
, I don't feel
But you really don’t care any more.
Author: lov3s
Beta: withlightning
Pairing: Belldom
Rating: R
Words: 899
Warning(s): Alcohol consumption, a little bit of angst.
Feedback: It's what I write for! Well, not exactly but you get what I mean.
Disclaimer: If I were to own Muse, I wouldn't be here relaying my fantasies. But hey, a girl can dream right?
A/N: Filled a prompt for this one! No kate hate! I hope the OP enjoys this! And, thank you, withlightning darling, for helping me beta this. I love you! As for the rest of you, I hope you'll like it. <3
Hey you, see me, pictures crazy
I’ve always been into the party scene. Everybody thought Morgan was the hardcore party guy, but when they do learn about what I did during those parties, Morgan wouldn’t even be remembered. But, they would never know because I will never tell them or let them see me, even. Not that you would care.
It was bad. I was bad. I would leave the club at ungodly hours in the morning, trudge my intoxicated self through the foreign streets and back to the hotel. More often than I’d like to admit, strangers I’ve met while partying had to do the job for me. Sometimes, I wonder what I did for them to bring me back to the hotel. Then again, I don’t think I want to know either.
All the world I've seen before me passing by
I've got nothing, to gain, to lose
I could afford it. I had no responsibilities, no partner to stay faithful to, no family to answer to, not even myself. The management had nothing on me. All I had to do was to be sober enough to play the next gig or whatever it is that they’ve planned. And being sober for that few hours was enough for me to want to go back to being intoxicated; the only time I felt free. Free of hurt, frustration, sadness, emotion. I couldn’t bear it. It was just too much. You were too much.
All the world I've seen before me passing by
*
Before she came along, before I lost you to her, we were inseparable, glued to the hips. You and I went everywhere together, did almost everything together. We even shared a hotel room together, because neither of us could sleep without having the other wrapped up in our arms. No, don’t get me wrong, we weren’t together, together. We weren’t dating or anything, we certainly weren’t a couple. Nothing of such. We were, are, two extremely close friends who’ve spent every waking moment in the last two decades of our lives together. Well, that’s what I tell myself every time, at least.
I wouldn’t say that I was surprised when I realised that I’ve fallen for you. It was only natural, right? The sweet caresses, long warm hugs, kisses on the cheeks, knowing looks, shit-eating grins, getting into trouble together and everything else shared between the both of us.
*
You don't care about how I feel
But all of that has been forgotten, now that you have her. She’s all that you see now, all that you need. You don’t need my arms wrapped around you, you don’t need my sweet caresses, you don’t need my kisses on your cheek, you don’t need me shooting you knowing looks once in a while. To put it simply; you just don’t need me. But how could I ever blame you for that? It wasn’t like as though you knew how I felt about you. You didn’t. So no, I could never blame you for not needing me. For forgetting me.
I don't feel it any more
I don't feel it any more
After the gig today, I decided to give the partying a skip. I bounded straight off the stage after the final riff of Knights, passing crew members by, making a beeline for the dressing room. I packed my things up, put on my leather jacket and headed towards the exit without even bothering to change out of my sweaty stage get up. Another second more I was sure I would die.
All night, I had to deal with her in the wings, taking pictures of you. I could barely concentrate on my drumming. I’m sure I made a few mistakes, given the hard looks you sent my way as I played. Anything to get you to look at me again. Anything for you to remember me.
I managed to reach the exit without having to stop for anyone or any questions about my early escape. I signalled to one of the crew members to get me a cab and also something about not feeling too well. I just missed you, is all.
I don't feel it any more
You don’t care about how I feel
I entered my hotel room and went straight toward the mini bar. I was shaking by then, all those thoughts in my head threatening to swallow me whole. I grabbed whatever came to sight first, unscrewed the cap, throwing my head backwards as the alcohol burned down my throat. A sigh of relief. I gathered whatever they had in the mini bar and brought it to my bed. I stripped off my clothes, grabbing a boxer short and putting it on. Opening another mini bottle and downing whatever it was. I laid back down on the empty bed, staring blankly at the white ceiling. There was a burning at the corners of my eyes but I took no notice. I didn’t want to feel it. I didn’t want to feel you.
It wasn’t long before the small bottles of alcohol were gone. I felt a little woozy in my head, but other than that, I felt free; free of hurt, frustration, sadness, except,
I don't sleep, any more, I don't eat, any more, I don't live, any more
I love you.
, I don't feel
But you really don’t care any more.