(no subject)
charlie brand wanted me to be his bass player. he wanted me to be in his band. i had the chance to go on tour with dear and asked him to wait. he felt like i was holding them back so they moved on. i'm glad i went on tour. changed my life. but a part of me wonders what would have happened had i joined.
he said they'll be in need of a guitar player when they get home from tour. he said i could try out. i would love to be in his band. but a part of me wants to stay here and create music with danny and matt. i would love to make something of my own instead of just joining a band that's already hot. i did that once and i lost the chance the play with scribble the sky and miniature tigers. now i have another chance, i think, to play with mini t's and i don't know what to do. i guess i'll just wait it out and see if i would even be in the band.
unrelated note: lacey is in town for a few days. i can't justify ignoring her and pretending to not give a shit that she's here. she showed up at my house today without calling. it was what i wanted. it's what i had hoped would happen. i kissed her and it felt great. when i'm away from her it's easy to get into the mindset that i should move on, but every time i'm with her i still feel the same old feelings. as much as i love her and as much as i love being with her, i don't think she loves me quite the same anymore. unrequited love is a bitch and i no longer want to experience it.
he said they'll be in need of a guitar player when they get home from tour. he said i could try out. i would love to be in his band. but a part of me wants to stay here and create music with danny and matt. i would love to make something of my own instead of just joining a band that's already hot. i did that once and i lost the chance the play with scribble the sky and miniature tigers. now i have another chance, i think, to play with mini t's and i don't know what to do. i guess i'll just wait it out and see if i would even be in the band.
unrelated note: lacey is in town for a few days. i can't justify ignoring her and pretending to not give a shit that she's here. she showed up at my house today without calling. it was what i wanted. it's what i had hoped would happen. i kissed her and it felt great. when i'm away from her it's easy to get into the mindset that i should move on, but every time i'm with her i still feel the same old feelings. as much as i love her and as much as i love being with her, i don't think she loves me quite the same anymore. unrequited love is a bitch and i no longer want to experience it.