It's been a while!
SO much has happened this year. I find it hard to cope with things going on. I'm REALLY finding it hard to cope with how much my parents have helped me this year. I love them so much.
I'm okay with being divorced. It was over long before he decided to leave. I am still pissed, however, at why he left and telling me that he regretted the last seven years of our marriage. But I do not regret the decision I made seven years ago (and we had discussed it) to not have children. I am not the maternal kind. I'm really not.
Now that I'm divorced, I'm really in a happy place. I do miss the dating and having a companion. I love the fact that I kept the house, it's MINE! I love the work that has been done to it. The redecorating has been outstanding, thanks to my friends and family. It really seems to be me.
I do have an interest that I've been talking to for a few months. We met through WoW. We've been playing together for some time, but a few months ago, it escalated to phone calls, etc. and I really like the attention I'm getting. He's in fucking Indiana!! That sucks. Yes, I'll admit, I want to screw his brains out and everything else I can do, but in the long run, he's no match for me. I'm not stuck up or anything, but I'm better educated, I'm 43 (and he is too) and I have something to show for it. I have a house and car and not in credit card debt, and he's still living with friends because he HAD been out of work for a very long time. I believe I have more drive and passion and I need to have someone with that equal drive and passion for life as I have.
Mom and Nick took me on a weekend cruise back in June. We decided on that cruise that I would go back to school. Since mom works for Texas Wesleyan, my tuition is free. I am VERY happy for this and I will NOT fuck up this college run. I'm going back to get my Bachelor's in Criminal Justice. I absolutely love this field. I've wanted to work in this field WAY before CSI was even a Hollywood director's dream (hell maybe even before the director was born). On the shit side, the free tuition I get from Tex Wes is going to be sent to me on a 1099 as additional income. This I wasn't expecting, but I'm slowly working my way to getting used to it.
Work sucks. I need out. I'm so stressed everyday, I just want to come home, drink the day away, watch TV, crawl in bed under the covers and be left alone until the morning when I have to start the shit day again. But really, I'm in a very good place in my life right now, because I'm trying to make the best for myself and do what I want to do. I may be in my 50's when I work in the crime field, but I'll be blissfully happy. In the meantime, my dad is trying to get me to post a resume with Homeland Security. I told him he has to take Doug too, we are a package deal :)
Doug is having a birthday party next weekend at S4. I totally look forward to this because I need to get out and dance (or fall), get really trashed (and fall) and possibly make out with a man or woman....I DON'T CARE AT THIS POINT! LOL
I finally got a tattoo during the cruise. My parents thought it was cool, they documented it and my dad whispers it my ear "hurts like a mother fucker, doesn't it?" LOL, hell yes! I hyperventilated and mom kept me supplied with water and I walked out with two purple tulips on my lower left leg.
I got the tattoo for a reason. I wanted to pretty much physically feel the pain that I have gone through this year and I wanted to try to get over my fear of needles. Three weeks ago, I got my second tattoo. One week ago I got bloodwork done. That needle at the doctor's office was NOTHING compared to the pain on my leg from those tattoos. But, I LOVE my tattoos. I look at them everyday thinking "OMG, I did it, I love them!" I think I'm over my fear of needles for bloodwork. I'm still terrified of shots!
Okay, I'm off to feed the cats, refill my wine glass and do whatever else I want to do.
*hugs* to all!
I'm okay with being divorced. It was over long before he decided to leave. I am still pissed, however, at why he left and telling me that he regretted the last seven years of our marriage. But I do not regret the decision I made seven years ago (and we had discussed it) to not have children. I am not the maternal kind. I'm really not.
Now that I'm divorced, I'm really in a happy place. I do miss the dating and having a companion. I love the fact that I kept the house, it's MINE! I love the work that has been done to it. The redecorating has been outstanding, thanks to my friends and family. It really seems to be me.
I do have an interest that I've been talking to for a few months. We met through WoW. We've been playing together for some time, but a few months ago, it escalated to phone calls, etc. and I really like the attention I'm getting. He's in fucking Indiana!! That sucks. Yes, I'll admit, I want to screw his brains out and everything else I can do, but in the long run, he's no match for me. I'm not stuck up or anything, but I'm better educated, I'm 43 (and he is too) and I have something to show for it. I have a house and car and not in credit card debt, and he's still living with friends because he HAD been out of work for a very long time. I believe I have more drive and passion and I need to have someone with that equal drive and passion for life as I have.
Mom and Nick took me on a weekend cruise back in June. We decided on that cruise that I would go back to school. Since mom works for Texas Wesleyan, my tuition is free. I am VERY happy for this and I will NOT fuck up this college run. I'm going back to get my Bachelor's in Criminal Justice. I absolutely love this field. I've wanted to work in this field WAY before CSI was even a Hollywood director's dream (hell maybe even before the director was born). On the shit side, the free tuition I get from Tex Wes is going to be sent to me on a 1099 as additional income. This I wasn't expecting, but I'm slowly working my way to getting used to it.
Work sucks. I need out. I'm so stressed everyday, I just want to come home, drink the day away, watch TV, crawl in bed under the covers and be left alone until the morning when I have to start the shit day again. But really, I'm in a very good place in my life right now, because I'm trying to make the best for myself and do what I want to do. I may be in my 50's when I work in the crime field, but I'll be blissfully happy. In the meantime, my dad is trying to get me to post a resume with Homeland Security. I told him he has to take Doug too, we are a package deal :)
Doug is having a birthday party next weekend at S4. I totally look forward to this because I need to get out and dance (or fall), get really trashed (and fall) and possibly make out with a man or woman....I DON'T CARE AT THIS POINT! LOL
I finally got a tattoo during the cruise. My parents thought it was cool, they documented it and my dad whispers it my ear "hurts like a mother fucker, doesn't it?" LOL, hell yes! I hyperventilated and mom kept me supplied with water and I walked out with two purple tulips on my lower left leg.
I got the tattoo for a reason. I wanted to pretty much physically feel the pain that I have gone through this year and I wanted to try to get over my fear of needles. Three weeks ago, I got my second tattoo. One week ago I got bloodwork done. That needle at the doctor's office was NOTHING compared to the pain on my leg from those tattoos. But, I LOVE my tattoos. I look at them everyday thinking "OMG, I did it, I love them!" I think I'm over my fear of needles for bloodwork. I'm still terrified of shots!
Okay, I'm off to feed the cats, refill my wine glass and do whatever else I want to do.
*hugs* to all!