haha
While i am not going to pretend that every college student doesnt live such a transient lifestyle i would just like to comment that living your life in four month incraments has its severe ups and severe downs. I am absolutley ecstatic to be moving in to my new apartment, as always there are things i am leaving behind that make me feel like i should be leaving fingernail marks in the heart of marshfield as i am dragged away....but again....its my choice to leave my beach and leave my dog and my hilariously awesome friends, otherwise known as my parents. Everything always changes so drastically from the beginning of the four months to the end of it, and there are always points within each of those that i really hate somoene, i am extremley happy, interested in somoene, severley sad, and above all uncannily fucked up and then when i move into the next span, i look back at those events and as always laugh at the disputes that mean nothing, feel the need to slap myself for when i was sad because whatever it was i was emotionally charged about is barely an existing part of my life anymore, and all of those times i was very happy i either appreciate them, wish i could carbon copy of their existance and paset them into every four months, and all of those times that i am fucked up i look back and shake my head at the mistakes while laughing them off, or i just mereley dont remmeber them, they didnt even have an impact, or im glad that they have created "one of those stories" that will be talked about at a later date, therefore usually having either a positive or embaressing existance of some sort. And all of those people that i am interetsed in usually follow suit for the intoxication situations...positive, embaressing, or meaningless. What doertunet my realizing all of this mean? Absolutley nothing. Because unfortunetly or fotunatley depending on your level of cyniscism......thats life. Thats it....you can learn from your mistakes and definetly start to form a much more concrete sculpture of yourself that is tangible enough for you to finally be able to make sense of things before and after they occur and sort out all of the crazy ideas that swim around in your head that you used to think either made you insane or a genius...but when it comes down to it.... theres no need to be self-important and try to philosophize about what is going to happen to you or what has happened to you or try to draw invisible lines with the thickest imaginary sharpy filled with dissapearing ink of the simmilarities, differencess, and inconsistencies that now fill your life in comparison with the last four month phase. Learning to just live is forgetting every single iota of whatever made sense and just doing what you want to do and what you need to do at that particular moment in time, because honestly...how much of a difference will it ever make?