Always Be
Always Be - Part 1 of 2
Bill closed the book quietly and leaned toward the bed. “Not working?”
Laura smiled wanly for a brief moment before wincing with a soft gasp. When she’d caught her breath, her eyes moved to gaze at him. “Sorry. It’s…not you. Or the story.”
“It’s just bad.” Setting the book to the side, he returned his attention to her, reaching out to take her hand. “All right?”
Her lips curved up slightly. “Yes. Very all right.”
“Good.” He shifted his chair so he was closer to the bed. “How bad?”
“Hmm.” Laura’s eyes fluttered shut and his gentle smile disappeared. “Bill…”
“Shh, I’m here.” Gently, he caressed her hand. “Just, be. For a bit. No worries, no story, nothing to think about. Just, be.” Falling silent, he reached out and picked up the small bottle of lotion on the table, flipping the top open he poured a small amount on the top of her hand and started to gently massage it into her skin, careful not to tear the delicate tissue. “All right?” He watched a tear run down her cheek. “Laura?”
“Fine.” Her head moved slightly on the pillow. “Talk to me? Just…talk?”
“All right.” Tilting his head slightly, he watched her, gauging her wishes. “About anything?”
“Mmm hmm.” Her lips twitched again and she sighed as he began telling her a story about one of his shore leave visits home, when he’d taken Lee and Zach to the airfield. When he finished the story, he segued into stories of other places he’d been, some familiar to her through her own political travels, others places she’d heard of but not experienced herself. When his voice trailed off, she stirred slightly. “Go on…listening.”
“I know you are.” Taking her other hand, he gently started massaging lotion into it.
“Feels good, but…” Laura smiled slightly, “what will the other soldiers say about your soft hands.”
“Ah.” Bill chuckled, “I can simply reply that they are battle scarred from our fight with cancer.” Watching her face closely, he saw her lips tighten. “And are but a fraction of what my partner in this battle is fighting with.”
“Oh, Bill.” His name came out as a soft sigh as another tear ran down her cheek, disappearing as he bent to capture it in a soft kiss.
When she remained silent, he bent over her. “Laura?” Her hand tightened on his wordlessly. “Any better?”
“I…” her eyes flew open, the panic in them all too familiar.
”Hold on…” Reaching out, he grabbed the basin and he slid his other arm around her back, supporting and lifting her gently. As she threw up what little was in her stomach, he eased his body behind hers on the bed, wrapping himself around her trembling body. “Shh…” he murmured into her ear. “Try to relax…” While the heaves continued, he closed his eyes, willing her body to relent its fight for just a few moments to give her some relief. When her convulsive movements finally stopped, she remained still, propped against him. “Just relax.” Pressing his cheek against the silken scarf around her head, he returned the basin to the bedside table and closed his eyes as he drew her back to lie against him. “Just relax.”
“Sorry.” Laura moved her head slightly, just enough to rub against his cheek while he gently wiped her face with the damp towel one of the medics had left on the table for him. “Bad one tonight.”
“I know.” Ignoring the tangle of tubes running to her arm, he maneuvered her so she was curled up with him on the narrow bed. “All right?”
“Cottle won’t like it.” Her lips twitched into a slight smile.
“So you airlock him.” Bill teased gently, his chuckle running through her.
“Can’t do that.” Reaching back over her head, she caressed his cheek. “Saved your life.”
“Cut off his cigarette supply?” He turned and kissed her hand.
“Gods no.” Laura shuddered slightly, “he ran out for a few days on New Caprica. Made our lives miserable…well, more miserable. Made a vow to never again cut him off if possible. Ever.”
“So, he’ll have to deal with it.” Lacing his fingers through hers, he stroked her palm with his thumb. “He has wanted me to get more rest.”
“Same here.” She sighed softly. “Beds better here with you in it.”
“Likewise.” Feeling her relax against him, her breathing slowing into sleep, he smiled, continuing his gentle massage of her hand until footsteps caused him to lift his head.
”How the frak did you both get up there.” Cottle crossed his arms and glared at him.
“Carefully.” Bill grinned crookedly at him. “And hush, she’s finally relaxed enough to sleep.”
Cottle glanced at the basin and frowned. “Bad one?”
“Yeah.” When she stirred slightly, he fell silent for a moment, waiting for her to settle back down before continuing. “I was helping her sit up, just sort of slid in here with her.”
“Helps her rest?” Cottle nodded. “Then stay. Just don’t make a practice of it.” With a final check of the medicines trickling into the iv tube, he turned, pausing before he pulled the curtain shut. “And for the record, I yelled at you both, you swore it wouldn’t happen again.”
“At least till the next time.” With a grin, Bill watched the doctor pull the curtain shut.
“Next what?” Laura mumbled softly, shifting her weight.
“Shh.” He adjusted his hold on her. “Sleep while you can.”
“Hmm.” She turned her head slightly, looking over her shoulder at him. “Cottle?”
“Yeah. Yelled at us good.” Bending, he kissed her cheek. “Go back to sleep, Laura, while you can.”
“Can’t. Icky.” Her eyes shutting again she shuddered. “You feel good though.”
“So concentrate on me.” Waiting as she shifted again, pressing herself closer to his warmth, Bill reached out and grabbed for the blanket, pulling it up over their bodies. “Better?”
“Mmm hmm.” Pulling the hand that was laced with his to the hollow between her breasts, Laura sighed. “Take me home tonight, when bag finished?”
He glanced over his shoulder at the iv bag, still about a quarter full of liquid. “If Cottle allows.”
“Threaten him?” Eyes still closed, she smiled sleepily. “You’re the Admiral, I’m still the President, we should outrank him.”
”Not when it comes to your health.” He rumbled into her ear. “Then I defer to him.”
“Can sleep and throw up just as easily there.” Laura suddenly turned, rolling into him as she cuddled into his body, nestling into his arms. “Please?”
“If that’s what you want.” He kissed the top of her head, finishing his thought silently, ‘and if Cottle allows.’
“I want.” She stiffened, her hand grasping at his jacket. “Frak.”
“Shh, ride it out.” Rubbing her back, he rested his chin on her scarf covered head, matching his breathing to hers until she relaxed again. “Okay?”
“Hate it.” By the tremor in her voice, he knew she was crying again, hating the weakness and the ways that her body was rebelling against her will.
“I know, Laura.” Shutting his eyes against his own tears, he sighed. “Just hold on to me for now, all right? We’ll go home in as soon as we can, I promise.”
“Kay…” She sniffed. “Sorry.”
“For being human?” He chuckled. “Can you imagine the scoop I’d get if I released that to the press? Laura Roslin is human?”
“Bigger headline than if I was Cylon.” Laura giggled softly. “And can you imagine what a picture of us like this would result in?”
”Ah yes, the immorality that is being allowed to run rampant in Sick Bay.” Bill grinned, “Cottle is renting out beds for those of us who like to live dangerously, and can’t find anywhere else to meet clandestinely.”
“In cahoots with Chief Tyrol, who has hidden areas of storage lockers and closed landing bays.” She added, sniffing again, “together they’ve cornered the market on illicit places to meet.”
“I can think of a few other places.” He shifted as her legs slid against his. “And we’d both be dressed…”
“A little more accessibly?” Laura smiled sleepily. “Which top do you want me to wear?”
“Since the red dress didn’t make it back with you, the white top. With the crossed over thing.” Bill smiled at the thought. “And your green skirt.”
“My green one?” Her smile faded slightly. “Really? I think it’s my least favorite.”
“Ah, but strategically speaking,” He tapped her leg. “It’s flared, and looser on you.”
“And?” Laura prodded dubiously.
“And, easier access, not to mention it doesn’t wrinkle as easily as your other ones.” His hand slid up under her untucked blouse. “I like to look at you in the others, but as far as illicit meetings, the green one is the most practical. And I like the white top. It brings back memories. But of course, the jacket with it, until we got…somewhere.”
She laughed softly. “I’d no idea you’d paid so much attention to my wardrobe, limited as it is.”
“Not the wardrobe,” Bill gently rubbed her back. “The Laura inside the wardrobe.”
“All right.” Laura toyed with the clasp on the collar of his jacket, “I’ll wear the white top and green bottom. I suppose you’ll have to wear this?”
“I do have other clothes.” He commented wryly.
“But if we’re being illicit and…strategic,” deftly she undid the clasp and top button before slipping her hand inside the jacket, “wouldn’t you stand out if you wore something else?”
“Indeed.” He nodded thoughtfully. “Excellent point.”
“Unless of course,” Laura’s lips curved up, “you had just come back from the gym, and we just happened to run into each other…and you just had your tanks and sweat pants on.”
“Of course.” Bill continued to run his hand up and down her spine.
“Except for the fact that I happen to like my Admiral in his uniform.” Resting her hand over his heart, she sighed and closed her eyes.
“Your Admiral?” Chuckling, he glanced down at her again, “How many Admirals are there?”
“You know what I mean. There’s the Fleet’s Admiral, in charge of the Fleet,” her finger tapped against him, “There’s the Admiral who deals with the Press and the Quorum, he’s very shut off and frowns a lot, there’s the Admiral who inspires us all through his passionate speeches, the Admiral who strategizes and is always a few steps ahead,” lifting her face, she kissed his cheek. “And then there’s my Admiral, who holds me, and doesn’t lie to me, and argues with me…” She sighed happily and cuddled into him. “My Admiral.”
Bill shook his head slightly, stopping as Cottle strode back into the cubicle. “Doctor.” He felt Laura tense under his hand.
“Admiral.” He inspected the machines hooked up to Laura and nodded to himself. “Madame President, your hand if I may?” When she extended her hand silently, he took it, deftly retrieving the iv line and bandaging it before removing the sensor pads that had been applied to her wrist and elbow. “You both know the instructions from here. If you insist on being in the same bed, I’d rather you not do it here. Next thing you know, one or both of you are going to end up either on the floor, or with back pains, last thing I need for either of you. Call me if you need me. Otherwise I’ll stop by in the morning to check on you.”
“Thank you.” Laura replied meekly, her head still buried under Bill’s chin.
“Admiral?” Cottle raised an eyebrow in his direction.
“Understood.” Bill nodded slightly. “We’ll be out of here as soon as she feels up to it.”
“Any minute now then, I expect.” Cottle turned, muttering something that sounded suspiciously like ‘ungrateful independent wretch’.
“How much do you think he heard?” She sighed.
”Well, just to be safe, I’d rather you not wear the green suit in here the next few times,” Bill grinned, “just in case.”
”Hmm. Don’t anyway, don’t like to wear skirts in here, with the bed and all.” Laura lifted her head and blinked at him. “Can we go home now? Or at least start to? It’s going to take me a few minutes to manage to be upright.”
“Hold on.” Carefully, he eased them up to a sitting position, waiting for her to give a slight nod before turning them so their legs were dangling off the side of the bed. “You sure you don’t want me to carry you?”
“Want, yes.” She glanced up at him, eyes wide in the dim light. “But, Cottle won’t let me out of here unless I go under my own power. And, as romantic as it would be, you know…”
“I know.” Bill chuckled. “Although, at this hour…”
“Let you carry me when we’re almost there.” Laura slid off the bed, catching her balance as she stood, his arms balancing her at her elbows. “Deal?”
“Deal.” As she took a step away from the bed, he slid off, following her. “You go see Cottle, get the final release, I’ll grab our things here.”
”Hurry.” Laura put her glasses on and slowly moved out of the cubicle toward Cottle’s office.
“Sleep young lady.” Cottle looked over his glasses at her. “And I mean it. You take the meds if you need to. That’s why I’m giving them to you. Not so you have some pretty little medicine bottles to look at. Understand?”
“Fine.” Laura grimaced and shoved the small bottle in her pocket as she turned toward Bill. “Ready?”
“Yeah.” He held up her case. “Everything all right?”
“Just letting her know why I’m letting her leave.” Cottle snapped the folder in front of him shut. “I give her the meds for a reason, you know.”
“I know.” He met Cottle’s eyes levelly as Laura sighed behind him. “We’ll see you in the morning.”
“I’ll bring the coffee.” Cottle nodded. “As usual.”
”Thanks.” Laura managed a smile before Bill’s hand on her lower back guided her from the office.
Five minutes later, Bill waited as her guard opened his hatch. “Thank you.”
“Sirs.” He nodded as Bill passed him, Laura in his arms.
“Thank you.” Laura echoed softly, her cheeks flushed. She hadn’t really considered the fact that her escort would be with them when Bill carried her the last part of their trip home. Although, in all honesty, it wasn’t the first time they’d witnessed him carrying her late at night coming home from Sick Bay or a meeting when she’d just barely had the physical strength to stay awake. Closing her eyes, she rested her face against his neck, inhaling his scent.
“Bed?” He rumbled in her ear.
“Yeah.” She felt him set her bag down before turning in the direction that led to his rack. Seconds later, he bent and seated her on the mattress. “Hold on a minute.” Her arms still wrapped around his neck, Laura remained still, willing her stomach to settle. “Was okay…hold on…”
“It’s all right.” Bill pressed a kiss against the top of her head, waiting until her grip on his shoulder relaxed. “You okay for a minute?”
“A minute.” Laura remained still, eyes closed as she released him. Still trying to get her stomach to settle, she listened as he moved around his quarters, a soft click as he set a glass down on the shelf next to the rack.
“Here,” he gently started to unbutton her shirt, easing it over her shoulders and letting it slide down her arms as he unfastened her bra. “And arms up…” Carefully, he slid one of his sweatshirts over her head. “Warm enough?”
“Hmm.” Eyes still closed, she nodded slightly as he laid her back.
“Pants again tomorrow?” Setting her shoes out of the way, he quickly finished undressing her, replacing her slacks with the sweatpants he’d found to fit her, since his literally fell off of her.
“Yeah. Pink blouse though. Left it here last week.” While he hung her slacks up and changed, she curled on her side under the covers, letting her thoughts drift as she listened to his movements.
“Here.” Bill perched on the side of the bed and picked up the glass of water. “Don’t fall asleep yet.”
“What.” She opened one eye and groaned when she realized he was holding out a pill. “Don’t want to.”
“Laura.” One eyebrow raised. “Doctors orders. And I promised.”
“Frak.” With a sigh, she propped herself up on an elbow, taking the glass of water from him and opening her mouth so he could place the pill inside. Following it with a gulp of water, she dropped her head back and swallowed.
“That’s one reason to take your medicine.” At the unexpected statement, Laura’s eyes flew back to his face, choking slightly as he chuckled. “Not tonight though.”
She swallowed again, the pill finally going all the way down before she could answer. “Is that a challenge?”
“No way.” Retrieving the glass from her hand, he returned it to the shelf and slid into the rack next to her. “Cottle would have both of our heads.”
“Wouldn’t be the first time.” She giggled softly, cuddling into him, her icy hands sliding up under his top.
”Laura!” He winced. “A little warning first?”
“Not as much fun.” Eyes closed, she sighed happily. “Much better here than in Sick Bay. More comfortable.”
“Agreed.” Reaching up, he switched the light off, leaving the rack bathed in the dim light from the lamp on his desk. They’d learned that both of them slept better with the dim light instead of complete darkness, as well as making it safer when he had to get her to the head as quickly as possible. “All right?”
“Mmm.” She pressed closer to him. “Getting warmer, which is as good as it can get for now.”
“Stomach okay?” Rubbing her back, he tightened his grip on her.
“No, but manageable.” Laura sighed and remained silent for a few minutes before speaking again, her voice strangely soft and uncertain. “Bill?”
“Hmm?” He glanced down at her. “Up?”
“No.” She traced absent designs on his chest. “Can I tell you something?”
”Something, anything, everything. You know that.” Bill frowned slightly as she took a deep breath. “Laura?”
“It’s stupid. I mean, with everything else…everything we are going through, it’s so stupid.” Her fingers continued their absent pattern, her voice missing its accustomed confidence. “Petty…we are dealing with, well, everything, evading and fighting, trying to find Earth, the problems in the fleet, and it’s so stupid…”
“Nothing that bothers you is petty.” At least it took her mind off of the problems of the Fleet, Baltar, Zarek, the Cylons…Starbuck, for a few minutes at least. “Out with it, Roslin.”
She took a deep breath. “I told you, it’s stupid.” Her fingers stilled as she shifted slightly, ducking her head and mumbling something into his chest.
“What?” With a finger, he tilted her chin up so he could see her face. “Laura?”
“I said.” Laura sighed, her eyes sliding past his shoulder. “I said, it’s stupid, but I miss my hair.”
“Your…” he blinked. “Laura, it will grow back.”
“Not the same.” She sighed. “I told you, petty, stupid, and vain. With all the problems out there, I don’t need to be wasting time missing my hair.”
Bill hesitated. Fleet issues, policy issues, even dealing with Lee were all things he knew something about dealing with, but…Laura and her hair? Completely out of his league. “Laura…it’s not stupid. It was beautiful…I mean, will be beautiful again.”
Surprising him, she laughed softly. “You know, I once told Billy he didn’t know anything about women. I’d made a comment on only having three outfits for the rest of my life, he said it was fine.”
”He was a fine young man.” Bill smiled sadly, “I’m still sorry…”
“I know.” Reaching up, she cupped his cheek. “We talked it out, I still miss him though. However, you’re not much better than he was in some aspects.”
“Really?” He reached up to clasp her hand. “I’m not sure how to take that.”
“Remember when we first met, my very proper hair?” Laura shifted to lie on her back, gazing up at the ceiling. “My proper, political hair? Couldn’t look too frivolous, always presenting the frakking appearance of being the proper Secretary of Education, one that you could trust with your children’s future.” She sighed. “Trimmed, styled…”
“It was short?” He offered weakly, earning him a sideways glance. “Well?”
“It was. And then…” she smiled wanly, “well, after the attack, I was busy, and it grew out, got long. I liked it long, but Rich…the President and his consultants said it didn’t present the correct political appearance for what his Cabinet needed to portray. So, for the last few years, I’d done what they told me to. I was a successful Secretary of Education, I was able to do a lot of good, institute programs that positively impacted all the colonies…influence students…so, my hair was a small price to pay. So to speak.”
“Okay…” Bill tried to remember the briefing pictures he’d glanced at several years ago, prior to her arrival.
“It’s all right.” Laura smiled slightly, “I told you it was stupid. But, as it grew out, I liked it. And there wasn’t anyone to tell me how to improve my political standing by changing my appearance.” At the low mumble from beside her, she looked at him. “What?”
He sighed, the inadvertent comment having slipped out. “I said, I did notice your legs.”
She giggled softly and leaned toward him, resting her chin on his shoulder. “I know. I caught you a few times.”
“You’re more than legs and hair, you know.” Bill touched her nose lightly. “You have a brilliant…”
“The next word out of your mouth better be mind.” She stopped him with a finger on his lips.
“Of course it was.” He kissed her finger. “Go on.”
She took a deep breath, letting her finger run along his cheek and down to rest on his chest again as she curled against him. “Gods, remember it on New Caprica? The little bit of sun we had…I actually had highlights. Don’t worry, I don’t expect you to know what they are.”
“Are those the little strands of blonde and light red that ran through your hair?” He tilted his head, watching her face. “I noticed those. Liked them.”
“Good enough.” Laura smiled. “And I was just a teacher, I could let it get as long as I wanted it to…”
“It was beautiful.” Bill nodded slightly, “you cut it when you became President again, right?”
“Good eye, Admiral.” She toyed with the fringe of her scarf. “I had it trimmed a bit. Tory arranged it with whoever she had do her hair, when she used to get it done.”
“She’ll come around.” Shaking his head slightly, he sighed, “I know you’ve been frustrated with her lately…I’m hoping it’s just a stage…I don’t want her to…”
“To hurt me?” Laura’s eyes cut up to meet his face, “it’s come close, politically, a few times. Personally, I don’t know what’s going through her mind now, she made it through so much, and now it just seems as though she’s crumbling…”
“She’ll come around.” He repeated gently, “eventually.”
“I hope so. I have this feeling…I may need your assistance with something eventually about her, needing to know where she’s going. She’s changed. But, back to the topic at hand…” She returned her gaze to the ceiling. “So, I finally had the hair I always dreamed of having. Long, wavy…and then…”
“Is that why you chose that wig?” Bill glanced at the wig stand, just in view on a shelf next to the head. “Shorter, no waves?”
“Hmm?” Following his gaze, Laura frowned, “no, actually it was the only one close to my hair color. Trust me, despite what I may have said a few years ago, I do not look good as a blonde.” At his chuckle, she hit him lightly. “Shut up, or I bring up the mustache.”
“Hey, I liked my mustache.” He tried to defend it.
“Bill, your face is much better open, like it is now.” She traced a finger along his cheek. “And what would you do without your shaving ritual?”
With a sigh, he capitulated. “Fine. But, your hair will grow back. You’ve only got a few more treatments…”
“I know. It’s stupid.” Laura returned her gaze to the ceiling. “But…”
“You’ve nothing to hide behind now.” Bill reached out and traced around her face. “You’re exposed…you’re afraid to twist a strand around your finger as you think, you’re afraid to tuck it behind your ear…you’re afraid it will slide and you won’t notice…”
“Yeah.” Tears started to well up in her eyes. “I mean, sometimes I get so mad at myself, because losing my hair is so little, so petty compared to what we’ve all lost, but I’m so tired, Bill. I fight and I fight, and I can’t…I’m not me…I’m just the President…and I can’t…” With a muffled sob, she rolled, burying her face into his chest as he held her.
“Shh.” Completely at a loss, he murmured against her head. “Shh, Laura, it’s all right. Shh…” Continuing to rub her back and make occasional soothing murmurs until she finally relaxed against him, the medicine taking effect, Bill sighed. Her hair? This wasn’t anything he was prepared to deal with…Cylons, Viper or Raptor problems, pilots out of control, that was what he knew.
Although, come to think of it…since she’d started wearing the wig, she had been more…he couldn’t really put his finger on it, harsher wasn’t the word, but, the only time he really saw Laura was when they were together, alone…and she wasn’t…she wasn’t wearing the wig. “Well, frak.” He grimaced, he really didn’t mind the wig, except when she chose to hide behind it, he thought she was just as beautiful with the scarf, her eyes expressive…He really did feel as inept as he remembered Billy being around Dee…his lips curved up. Dualla. Perhaps he’d speak with her tomorrow…get some of those insights he didn’t seem to have. Although, he had loved Laura’s hair, it had only been a part of her….when she sighed softly and nestled into him, he tightened his arms around her and closed his eyes, following her into sleep while they could before the nausea that accompanied every treatment appeared again.
The next day, Bill glanced around the CIC and caught his daughter in law’s eye. “Lieutenant, a word?”
”Yes sir?” She moved to join him, a confused look on her face as he beckoned her to follow him to the upper level overlooking the CIC. “Sir?”
“Lieutenant.” He cleared his throat. “Duella.”
“Is something wrong Admiral?” She leaned toward him, frowning as he glanced around to make sure there was no one else in earshot. “Sir?”
“I need…a…” he sighed, “I need your opinion and some help on something.”
“Of course sir, anything,” Dee smiled. “You know that.”
“All right.” He coughed softly and took a deep breath. “The President…”
When he didn’t continue, she tilted her head, watching him. “Yes?”
Bill sighed. “The President…and I…were talking, last night.” He glanced around the CIC, he was an Admiral for frak’s sake, not a nugget…. “She…made a comment…about her hair.” His eyes moved toward hers, expecting to see amusement, but finding compassion instead. “Losing her hair.”
“She had beautiful hair.” Dee stated softly, nodding. “The wig doesn’t suit her…it’s almost as she’s changing her public appearance to suit the wig, harsher…begging your pardon sir. It’s not a criticism of her, just an observation. When we’ve spoken privately, she’s not as…well, the wig isn’t an influence. Sir.”
“That’s her opinion as well.” He let out a sigh, “I don’t understand it, and yet I can…I know she needs it to feel Presidential, it’s part of her armor, but she loses Laura when she puts the wig on. And I want to help her with that, but don’t know how.” He winced, “she stated I was a close second to Billy on understanding women.”
Dee laughed, muffling the sound quickly, “he was learning, but I see her point. Sir.” Crossing her arms, she glanced down as Laura, surrounded by several Quorum and security team members entered the CIC. “And…I see what you mean.” Watching, she waited as Laura glanced around, her gaze landing on them briefly until Bill nodded and held up a finger, then returned her attention to Saul Tigh, who was speaking to the Quorum members. “So what you want to do, is let the President feel more like Laura again?”
Bill let out a sigh of relief. “Something like that. I need to…well, any suggestions you could give me would be welcome. I like her in red, but I’m not exactly sure…well, what would work.”
“Of course.” Dee leaned on the railing, gazing down at the group in the center of the room, thinking as she watched them. With a decisive nod, she straightened. “I know.”
“Well?” He watched her expectantly.
”Sir, I think it might be better for both of us, as well as her, if I take care of this.” Dee met his eyes levelly. “I’ll catch the shuttle this afternoon, be back tonight. But, you have to handle Lee if wants to know where I’m going.”
“Do I want to know where you’re going?” Bill raised an eyebrow. “You’re not going to do anything foolish are you?”
“Nope. Just take Racetrack and do some shopping. At the market.” Dee grinned. “I’ll bill you for it when we get back.”
“You’re going to buy her something?” He looked dubious. “What?”
“Just trust me for now, sir.” With a salute, she turned and moved away from him as Laura climbed the stairs. “Madame President.”
“Lieutenant.” Laura smiled warmly. “Good to see you again.”
”Likewise.” She eyed Laura closely then nodded toward Bill. “Go easy on him Ma’am, I just had a few questions for him.”
“Very well.” With a nod, Laura continued to his side. “Hi there.”
“Hello.” Unseen by watchers below, he moved his hand to her lower back, caressing it gently. “You feeling all right?”
“As well as can be expected.” She smiled wanly, “we’re scheduled to be here in the CIC for another few minutes then back to the Quorum meeting.”
“You’re taking it easy?” Bill frowned, turning to face her.
“I’m sitting, and haven’t thrown anything at anyone. Yet.” Laura sighed. “Cottle cleared it. Then I have to go back to Colonial One for a few hours. I’ll be back on the Galactica by dinner time. I think I agreed to have dinner with some pilots tonight.”
“You going to be up to it?” Eyeing her face, his frown deepened.
“I’ll make it short.” She smiled slightly. “The good thing is, the pilots are the only people that are almost as overprotective as you are. Hot Dog and Racetrack will keep it simple. And I like spending time with them.”
“So I’ll see you tonight then?” Bill glanced down at the main floor of the CIC, watching the group that was waiting for her.
“Come to dinner with me?” Laura offered, “that way, if I’m tired, you can pull rank, and you can see for yourself that they won’t let me overdo it.”
“Call me when you’re heading back.” His eyes moved toward her lips, watching as they curved. “Yeah, me too.”
”See you.” With a final nod, she stepped back, returning to the lower deck cautiously, as he watched her go.
That night, he was headed to the Pilot’s Mess when he heard footsteps running toward him. “Sir?” Racetrack fell in step with him. “Lieutenant Duella asked me to give you a message.”
“Very well?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Well, we were successful, she’s leaving you a package on your desk in your quarters. Let one of us know if…well, you need a different, uh size.” She blushed, an unexpected look on her face.
”Do I want to know what’s in the package?” They paused outside the mess entrance.
Racetrack winced, “I’d rather not go into that with you sir. But, I think you and the President will appreciate it.”
“I see.” He eyed her for another moment and sighed. “Very well.” Shaking his head, he opened the hatch, smiling at the sight of Laura surrounded by Viper pilots, glasses off as she finished whatever it was in the glass they’d handed her, a cheer going up as she slammed the glass back on the table.
Hot Dog was the first to notice them, “Sir, Admiral…” they shot to their feet.
“As you were.” He nodded and moved into the room, Racetrack following him. “Pilots, Madame President.”
“Admiral.” She smiled at him and indicated the chair next to hers. “Join us.”
“Thank you.” Seating himself, he glanced at the glass in front of her. “What’s this?”
“We were just, um…” Laura shrugged, “toasting.”
“Toasting?” His gaze swept the table. “What?”
“Me.” She smiled, and he noticed that she actually had some color in her cheeks, hopefully not from whatever it was he’d just seen her drink. ”Um, yes sir.” Hot Dog spoke up, “and we cleared what she could drink with Doc Cottle.”
“You did?” Bill blinked.
“Yes sir.” He nodded, “I mean, we couldn’t toast a new call sign without it, and we’d had the dinner planned for several weeks now…”
“Apparently, Tory told them I had a very busy schedule.” Laura frowned. “Need to speak to her about that.”
Hot Dog grinned, “no need, you’re welcome anytime you can get away. You know that, Tangle.”
“Tangle?” Bill blinked in surprise. “Your call sign is Tangle?”
“Yep, as in don’t tangle with Madame President.” One of the other pilots grinned, “we figured the obvious ones would be over done. We wanted one that was ours to give.”
“Apparently, Airlock isn’t so politically correct.” Laura shrugged and reached for the glass that had just been set down in front of Bill.
“Mine.” He deftly removed it from her hand and lifted it, waiting as the other pilots mimicked him with hastily filled glasses. “To Tangle, may we never have to with her.”
“So say we all!” They yelled in unison then downed the drink as she watched, eyes bright.
“So say we all.” Chuckling, he set the glass down. “However…”
“However.” Standing, she sighed. “I have an early briefing in the morning ladies and gentlemen. Thank you for a delightful evening.”
“Thank you for coming.” Hot Dog held up a hand, “hold on though.” As they paused, he held out a package for her. “Your Call Sign plaque.”
“My…” Blinking back the sudden tears that had formed, Laura gently took the paper wrapped package and carefully opened it. “Oh…” She held it so Bill could look over her shoulder at the picture, a candid one of her raising the champagne bottle in front of the Blackbird, Bill and Chief Tyrol framing her. “It’s wonderful.”
“Well, we didn’t really have one of you in your own Viper, so we figured this was closest.” Racetrack smiled at her.
“Thank you.” Clasping the picture to her chest, Laura gazed around the room, “thank you all.”
“Our pleasure, Tangle.” Hot Dog grinned. “And, you’re welcome to hide out in here any time.”
“I’ll keep that in mind next time I need a bunk.” She smiled at them. “Or a hideout.”
“At least I’ll know where to find her.” Bill chuckled and touched her arm. “Madame President?”
“Admiral.” With a final smile around the room, she exited, waiting until the hatch closed behind them to smile up at him. “Did you know?”
“Didn’t have a clue.” Glancing at her, he smiled back. “May I?”
”Oh, yes.” Tucking her arm through his, she held out the picture. “So much has happened since then.”
”Indeed.” Bill looked at the picture as they walked along the corridor. “I really thought you were going to hit it with the bottle.”
She giggled softly, “I wouldn’t have done that. But, it was fun. I remember that much.”
“Good.” He smiled, “I like the call sign too.”
“A bit confusing, but I like it. It’s different.” Laura paused as he stepped ahead of her to open the hatch. “Thank you gentlemen.” With a final nod to her guard, she stepped through the hatch.
“You stand relieved, gentlemen.” Indicating his guard, he dismissed her escort. “The President will be leaving for her meeting at zero seven hundred hours.”
”Yes sir.” With a nod, they waited until the hatch closed before turning and moving down the corridor.
Bill continued into his quarters. “How are you feeling?”
“Tired. Cold.” She sighed, tying the scarf around her head as she returned from placing her wig on its stand. Her eyes met his before she sank down onto the couch. “The normal. But, I needed that. You know most of them are just an extension of you. Younger, less tempered with time, but, I needed them tonight. With most of them…it’s a duality that I can appreciate, share.”
“A duality?” Pouring two glasses of water, he glanced at the brown paper wrapped parcel placed inconspicuously on the edge of his desk. Ignoring it for the time being, he carried the water over to her, handing her a glass before picking up the blanket that lay folded on the back of the couch and draping it over her. Setting the other glass on the table in front of the couch, he opened her case and handed her the pile of folders on top. “Laura? Duality?”
“Hmm? Oh, yes.” Frowning at the pile of folders, she sighed. “The wild, carefree personalities, the focused killers. I’ve heard them during battles, I’ve lived with some of them through New Caprica. I’ve prayed over pictures of the ones we’ve lost. They are our future, our past.” Her eyes met his as he settled down next to her with his own pile of folders. “Our present. They remember me as not only the President, but also as the schoolteacher, the woman who stood next to some of them in ration lines, they’ve seen me at my worst, throwing up in their raptors, knelt next to me in the Memory corridor. They give me hope. And I believe in them.” She finished simply then giggled softly. “Way too maudlin. On one shot of ambrosia.” She glanced at Bill, one eyebrow raised. “Which they received permission from Cottle to give me.”
“So they said.” Bill watched her take a sip of water before setting the glass on the table next to her. “Did you eat tonight?”
“Some.” She shrugged and opened the top folder. “I’ve been nibbling all day when I feel like it. Stashed some crackers in my bag. So, don’t worry, I know better.” At the soft snort from the other side of the couch, she glanced up. “Usually.”
“That’s better.” He threw her a grin before returning his attention to his own folder.
Several hours later, not having heard any comments or questions from her for several minutes, Bill glanced over to see Laura sleeping, the last folder she held in danger of slipping to the floor. Leaning over, he rescued it just before the papers fell out, and set it on top of the pile she’d already completed before returning his attention to the folder he held. When he finished, he carefully placed all their files on the table in front of the couch, eyeing the four piles warily. Fortunately both of the completed files were significantly larger than the ones neither had looked at, which meant with any amount of luck, they could finish in the morning. With a sigh, he turned to look at Laura, gazing at the weary lines in her face. She did look slightly more relaxed than usual, which meant she was dozing with little pain or nausea, a small blessing or a sign of the tolerance that he knew she’d built up.
Following their conversation of the previous night, he was glad that she’d had the opportunity to relax tonight, and from the comments he’d heard, or those that had been passed on to him, he knew that the pilots respected her, no small feat for someone who didn’t fly, or wasn’t even in the military. Chuckling, he tried to imagine her as a pilot, and couldn’t. She wouldn’t have been a pilot for long anyway, not with the way her mind worked. The brass would have tagged her for a strategist early on and pulled her off the front lines. Although, not having known her when she was younger, he really didn’t know. How much of who she was today was what she’d already survived and lived before the Cylon attack, and how much was out of necessity since the attack. What had Laura the young teacher been like? He’d seen glimmers the few times he’d watched her with children, unguarded and encouraging, taking the time to prod them to find the answers on their own, to make each one feel special…
What was it she’d said the previous night, something about how she felt harder, harsher…didn’t like what she’d had to become, and missed who she’d been? Didn’t know who she’d become? Bill shook his head, he’d seen her face when he’d walked in tonight, the life and light as she’d laughed at some probably inappropriate joke. She hadn’t been the President tonight, for just a brief time, she’d been Laura. Or as they affectionately referred to her, ‘Madame Prez’. But even in the affection and raucous laughter, there’d been respect for her. A protective shell for her. Which didn’t mean they wouldn’t question her decisions, or always understand her orders, but did mean that most of them understood…they understood that while having to watch everything that happened, when they were out fighting, they were part of the battle, and someone else was watching the war. And somehow, they’d come to trust her to watch the war. As they trusted him.
”Stop staring at me.” At the soft whisper, he focused on her, not surprised to see her eyes were still closed. At his chuckle, she smiled. “You know I can tell.”
“Likewise.” Leaning over, he brushed a kiss across her lips. “Ready to go to bed?”
“Requires moving. Warm and comfortable now.” She murmured, shifting slightly against the leather couch. “Stay here?”
“You’ll wake up with a sore back, remember?” Standing, he crossed to the rack and turned the covers down before retrieving her sweatshirt and pants, leaving them on the rack. “Shower?”
“Hmm?” Her eyes opened. “Shower?”
“Come along Tangle.” Having turned the water on, he returned to the couch and looked down at her.
“Shower.” Laura sighed, “since I’m awake.” Extending one arm, she waited for him to grasp it, helping her stand. “I am awake, right?”
“I think so.” Chuckling, he slid an arm around her waist, leading her toward the head. “Can you make it on your own?”
“Yeah.” Brushing a kiss against his cheek, she smiled sleepily at him. “I’ll call you if I start to feel faint.”
“You better.” He frowned slightly at her, remembering the evening after one of her treatments a few weeks earlier when he’d heard first a thud, followed by a louder crash and her cry as she’d slipped and fallen against the sink, knocking the items on top off as she fell to the floor. He’d found her leaning against the wall, the towel pulled hastily over her body, one hand pressed to her forehead where she’d cut it open slightly. “When you start to feel it, not on your way down.”
“I promise.” She smiled and picked up the clothes he’d set out for her then stepped into the head, swinging the door shut, but leaving it slightly ajar, another agreement they’d come to so he could hear her if she needed anything. It also enabled them to continue any conversations they’d started. He’d also agreed to leave the door ajar when he was in the head, since as she’d pointed out, he still needed to hear her.
After waiting a moment, Bill moved across the room and quietly opened the package on his desk. When he realized that he was now holding a delicate set of red lingerie, he blinked, glancing first at the head to make sure the water was still running, then back down at the items he held. And his daughter in law had picked these out? Still…a smile crossed his face. Even if she only wore them occasionally…Realizing the water had shut off, he quickly rewrapped them in the paper and placed the parcel in his desk just as she called his name.
“What’s wrong?” He moved toward the head, unbuttoning his jacket and dropping it on the rack as he passed by.
“Nothing.” As he swung the door open, she glanced at him. “Really Bill, sometimes I just think of something to ask you, it’s not always an emergency.”
“Just checking.” He managed a smile. “What is it?”
”My picture.” Closing the bottle of lotion she’d just used, Laura smiled at him. “Could we find a place in here for it? My quarters on Colonial One…well, I’d just rather it be here. Where we can see it.”
“How about next to mine.” Bill suggested, moving to the side as she passed him.
“You have one?” She frowned a moment, then laughed. “Of course you do. You’ll hang them next to each other?”
“I’ll find a place for both of them.” He watched her absently pick up his jacket and smooth the wrinkles before hanging it next to the suit she’d just taken off. “You took your meds?”
“Not yet. I’ll take them in a minute.” With a sigh, she glanced at the table in the living area. “We still have files to go through, don’t we?”
”We can get to them in the morning.” Bending, he untied his boots and placed them in the closet.
“No, I’d rather finish them tonight.” Laura raised an eyebrow. “However….”
“What?” Bill glanced at her.
“Go on, shower,” she smiled innocently at him and waved her hand in his direction. “Really.”
“What are you up to?” His eyes narrowed as he watched her, perched on the edge of the rack.
“Nothing.” With a giggle, she shrugged her shoulders. “I’m going to get a glass of water and take my meds, look at a few reports. That’s all.”
“Right.” He sighed. “Call me if you need anything.”
“I will.” She smiled again, waiting until he’d entered the head before sliding off the rack. Padding over to the couch, she picked up the two smaller stacks of reports and carried them back to the rack, setting one stack carefully on the table next to the rack, the other in the center of the mattress. Retrieving a glass of water, she obediently shook out the meds she was supposed to take and swallowed them with a grimace. By the time Bill emerged from the head, she was propped up in the rack, resting against pillows she’d taken from the couch, studying the reports she had left.
“Interesting compromise.” He chuckled at the sight.
“Thought so.” Laura nodded at the pile on the table. “Those are yours, Admiral.”
“Very well.” Clicking the light off in the head, he moved to join her, settling under the covers as she edged over. “Meds?”
”Yes sir, Admiral sir.” She peered over her glasses at him. “Taken as ordered, sir.”
”Good.” He picked up his stack of folders, chuckling as she shifted again, leaning her back against his chest. “Comfortable?”
“Mmm hmm.” Engrossed by her report, she nodded absently, making a notation in the margin.
With a chuckle, he opened the first folder in his stack and began to read. Sometime later, he glanced down to realize that she was once again sound asleep. Carefully, he closed his report and returned it to the table before picking up her stack and setting it at right angles on top of his. Slipping her glasses off, he set them on top of the folders, his next to them before wrapping his arm around her slender body and shifting them so they were lying under the covers, his smile widening as she murmured something unintelligible and curled into him. Reaching up, he switched the light off and closed his eyes.
Bill closed the book quietly and leaned toward the bed. “Not working?”
Laura smiled wanly for a brief moment before wincing with a soft gasp. When she’d caught her breath, her eyes moved to gaze at him. “Sorry. It’s…not you. Or the story.”
“It’s just bad.” Setting the book to the side, he returned his attention to her, reaching out to take her hand. “All right?”
Her lips curved up slightly. “Yes. Very all right.”
“Good.” He shifted his chair so he was closer to the bed. “How bad?”
“Hmm.” Laura’s eyes fluttered shut and his gentle smile disappeared. “Bill…”
“Shh, I’m here.” Gently, he caressed her hand. “Just, be. For a bit. No worries, no story, nothing to think about. Just, be.” Falling silent, he reached out and picked up the small bottle of lotion on the table, flipping the top open he poured a small amount on the top of her hand and started to gently massage it into her skin, careful not to tear the delicate tissue. “All right?” He watched a tear run down her cheek. “Laura?”
“Fine.” Her head moved slightly on the pillow. “Talk to me? Just…talk?”
“All right.” Tilting his head slightly, he watched her, gauging her wishes. “About anything?”
“Mmm hmm.” Her lips twitched again and she sighed as he began telling her a story about one of his shore leave visits home, when he’d taken Lee and Zach to the airfield. When he finished the story, he segued into stories of other places he’d been, some familiar to her through her own political travels, others places she’d heard of but not experienced herself. When his voice trailed off, she stirred slightly. “Go on…listening.”
“I know you are.” Taking her other hand, he gently started massaging lotion into it.
“Feels good, but…” Laura smiled slightly, “what will the other soldiers say about your soft hands.”
“Ah.” Bill chuckled, “I can simply reply that they are battle scarred from our fight with cancer.” Watching her face closely, he saw her lips tighten. “And are but a fraction of what my partner in this battle is fighting with.”
“Oh, Bill.” His name came out as a soft sigh as another tear ran down her cheek, disappearing as he bent to capture it in a soft kiss.
When she remained silent, he bent over her. “Laura?” Her hand tightened on his wordlessly. “Any better?”
“I…” her eyes flew open, the panic in them all too familiar.
”Hold on…” Reaching out, he grabbed the basin and he slid his other arm around her back, supporting and lifting her gently. As she threw up what little was in her stomach, he eased his body behind hers on the bed, wrapping himself around her trembling body. “Shh…” he murmured into her ear. “Try to relax…” While the heaves continued, he closed his eyes, willing her body to relent its fight for just a few moments to give her some relief. When her convulsive movements finally stopped, she remained still, propped against him. “Just relax.” Pressing his cheek against the silken scarf around her head, he returned the basin to the bedside table and closed his eyes as he drew her back to lie against him. “Just relax.”
“Sorry.” Laura moved her head slightly, just enough to rub against his cheek while he gently wiped her face with the damp towel one of the medics had left on the table for him. “Bad one tonight.”
“I know.” Ignoring the tangle of tubes running to her arm, he maneuvered her so she was curled up with him on the narrow bed. “All right?”
“Cottle won’t like it.” Her lips twitched into a slight smile.
“So you airlock him.” Bill teased gently, his chuckle running through her.
“Can’t do that.” Reaching back over her head, she caressed his cheek. “Saved your life.”
“Cut off his cigarette supply?” He turned and kissed her hand.
“Gods no.” Laura shuddered slightly, “he ran out for a few days on New Caprica. Made our lives miserable…well, more miserable. Made a vow to never again cut him off if possible. Ever.”
“So, he’ll have to deal with it.” Lacing his fingers through hers, he stroked her palm with his thumb. “He has wanted me to get more rest.”
“Same here.” She sighed softly. “Beds better here with you in it.”
“Likewise.” Feeling her relax against him, her breathing slowing into sleep, he smiled, continuing his gentle massage of her hand until footsteps caused him to lift his head.
”How the frak did you both get up there.” Cottle crossed his arms and glared at him.
“Carefully.” Bill grinned crookedly at him. “And hush, she’s finally relaxed enough to sleep.”
Cottle glanced at the basin and frowned. “Bad one?”
“Yeah.” When she stirred slightly, he fell silent for a moment, waiting for her to settle back down before continuing. “I was helping her sit up, just sort of slid in here with her.”
“Helps her rest?” Cottle nodded. “Then stay. Just don’t make a practice of it.” With a final check of the medicines trickling into the iv tube, he turned, pausing before he pulled the curtain shut. “And for the record, I yelled at you both, you swore it wouldn’t happen again.”
“At least till the next time.” With a grin, Bill watched the doctor pull the curtain shut.
“Next what?” Laura mumbled softly, shifting her weight.
“Shh.” He adjusted his hold on her. “Sleep while you can.”
“Hmm.” She turned her head slightly, looking over her shoulder at him. “Cottle?”
“Yeah. Yelled at us good.” Bending, he kissed her cheek. “Go back to sleep, Laura, while you can.”
“Can’t. Icky.” Her eyes shutting again she shuddered. “You feel good though.”
“So concentrate on me.” Waiting as she shifted again, pressing herself closer to his warmth, Bill reached out and grabbed for the blanket, pulling it up over their bodies. “Better?”
“Mmm hmm.” Pulling the hand that was laced with his to the hollow between her breasts, Laura sighed. “Take me home tonight, when bag finished?”
He glanced over his shoulder at the iv bag, still about a quarter full of liquid. “If Cottle allows.”
“Threaten him?” Eyes still closed, she smiled sleepily. “You’re the Admiral, I’m still the President, we should outrank him.”
”Not when it comes to your health.” He rumbled into her ear. “Then I defer to him.”
“Can sleep and throw up just as easily there.” Laura suddenly turned, rolling into him as she cuddled into his body, nestling into his arms. “Please?”
“If that’s what you want.” He kissed the top of her head, finishing his thought silently, ‘and if Cottle allows.’
“I want.” She stiffened, her hand grasping at his jacket. “Frak.”
“Shh, ride it out.” Rubbing her back, he rested his chin on her scarf covered head, matching his breathing to hers until she relaxed again. “Okay?”
“Hate it.” By the tremor in her voice, he knew she was crying again, hating the weakness and the ways that her body was rebelling against her will.
“I know, Laura.” Shutting his eyes against his own tears, he sighed. “Just hold on to me for now, all right? We’ll go home in as soon as we can, I promise.”
“Kay…” She sniffed. “Sorry.”
“For being human?” He chuckled. “Can you imagine the scoop I’d get if I released that to the press? Laura Roslin is human?”
“Bigger headline than if I was Cylon.” Laura giggled softly. “And can you imagine what a picture of us like this would result in?”
”Ah yes, the immorality that is being allowed to run rampant in Sick Bay.” Bill grinned, “Cottle is renting out beds for those of us who like to live dangerously, and can’t find anywhere else to meet clandestinely.”
“In cahoots with Chief Tyrol, who has hidden areas of storage lockers and closed landing bays.” She added, sniffing again, “together they’ve cornered the market on illicit places to meet.”
“I can think of a few other places.” He shifted as her legs slid against his. “And we’d both be dressed…”
“A little more accessibly?” Laura smiled sleepily. “Which top do you want me to wear?”
“Since the red dress didn’t make it back with you, the white top. With the crossed over thing.” Bill smiled at the thought. “And your green skirt.”
“My green one?” Her smile faded slightly. “Really? I think it’s my least favorite.”
“Ah, but strategically speaking,” He tapped her leg. “It’s flared, and looser on you.”
“And?” Laura prodded dubiously.
“And, easier access, not to mention it doesn’t wrinkle as easily as your other ones.” His hand slid up under her untucked blouse. “I like to look at you in the others, but as far as illicit meetings, the green one is the most practical. And I like the white top. It brings back memories. But of course, the jacket with it, until we got…somewhere.”
She laughed softly. “I’d no idea you’d paid so much attention to my wardrobe, limited as it is.”
“Not the wardrobe,” Bill gently rubbed her back. “The Laura inside the wardrobe.”
“All right.” Laura toyed with the clasp on the collar of his jacket, “I’ll wear the white top and green bottom. I suppose you’ll have to wear this?”
“I do have other clothes.” He commented wryly.
“But if we’re being illicit and…strategic,” deftly she undid the clasp and top button before slipping her hand inside the jacket, “wouldn’t you stand out if you wore something else?”
“Indeed.” He nodded thoughtfully. “Excellent point.”
“Unless of course,” Laura’s lips curved up, “you had just come back from the gym, and we just happened to run into each other…and you just had your tanks and sweat pants on.”
“Of course.” Bill continued to run his hand up and down her spine.
“Except for the fact that I happen to like my Admiral in his uniform.” Resting her hand over his heart, she sighed and closed her eyes.
“Your Admiral?” Chuckling, he glanced down at her again, “How many Admirals are there?”
“You know what I mean. There’s the Fleet’s Admiral, in charge of the Fleet,” her finger tapped against him, “There’s the Admiral who deals with the Press and the Quorum, he’s very shut off and frowns a lot, there’s the Admiral who inspires us all through his passionate speeches, the Admiral who strategizes and is always a few steps ahead,” lifting her face, she kissed his cheek. “And then there’s my Admiral, who holds me, and doesn’t lie to me, and argues with me…” She sighed happily and cuddled into him. “My Admiral.”
Bill shook his head slightly, stopping as Cottle strode back into the cubicle. “Doctor.” He felt Laura tense under his hand.
“Admiral.” He inspected the machines hooked up to Laura and nodded to himself. “Madame President, your hand if I may?” When she extended her hand silently, he took it, deftly retrieving the iv line and bandaging it before removing the sensor pads that had been applied to her wrist and elbow. “You both know the instructions from here. If you insist on being in the same bed, I’d rather you not do it here. Next thing you know, one or both of you are going to end up either on the floor, or with back pains, last thing I need for either of you. Call me if you need me. Otherwise I’ll stop by in the morning to check on you.”
“Thank you.” Laura replied meekly, her head still buried under Bill’s chin.
“Admiral?” Cottle raised an eyebrow in his direction.
“Understood.” Bill nodded slightly. “We’ll be out of here as soon as she feels up to it.”
“Any minute now then, I expect.” Cottle turned, muttering something that sounded suspiciously like ‘ungrateful independent wretch’.
“How much do you think he heard?” She sighed.
”Well, just to be safe, I’d rather you not wear the green suit in here the next few times,” Bill grinned, “just in case.”
”Hmm. Don’t anyway, don’t like to wear skirts in here, with the bed and all.” Laura lifted her head and blinked at him. “Can we go home now? Or at least start to? It’s going to take me a few minutes to manage to be upright.”
“Hold on.” Carefully, he eased them up to a sitting position, waiting for her to give a slight nod before turning them so their legs were dangling off the side of the bed. “You sure you don’t want me to carry you?”
“Want, yes.” She glanced up at him, eyes wide in the dim light. “But, Cottle won’t let me out of here unless I go under my own power. And, as romantic as it would be, you know…”
“I know.” Bill chuckled. “Although, at this hour…”
“Let you carry me when we’re almost there.” Laura slid off the bed, catching her balance as she stood, his arms balancing her at her elbows. “Deal?”
“Deal.” As she took a step away from the bed, he slid off, following her. “You go see Cottle, get the final release, I’ll grab our things here.”
”Hurry.” Laura put her glasses on and slowly moved out of the cubicle toward Cottle’s office.
“Sleep young lady.” Cottle looked over his glasses at her. “And I mean it. You take the meds if you need to. That’s why I’m giving them to you. Not so you have some pretty little medicine bottles to look at. Understand?”
“Fine.” Laura grimaced and shoved the small bottle in her pocket as she turned toward Bill. “Ready?”
“Yeah.” He held up her case. “Everything all right?”
“Just letting her know why I’m letting her leave.” Cottle snapped the folder in front of him shut. “I give her the meds for a reason, you know.”
“I know.” He met Cottle’s eyes levelly as Laura sighed behind him. “We’ll see you in the morning.”
“I’ll bring the coffee.” Cottle nodded. “As usual.”
”Thanks.” Laura managed a smile before Bill’s hand on her lower back guided her from the office.
Five minutes later, Bill waited as her guard opened his hatch. “Thank you.”
“Sirs.” He nodded as Bill passed him, Laura in his arms.
“Thank you.” Laura echoed softly, her cheeks flushed. She hadn’t really considered the fact that her escort would be with them when Bill carried her the last part of their trip home. Although, in all honesty, it wasn’t the first time they’d witnessed him carrying her late at night coming home from Sick Bay or a meeting when she’d just barely had the physical strength to stay awake. Closing her eyes, she rested her face against his neck, inhaling his scent.
“Bed?” He rumbled in her ear.
“Yeah.” She felt him set her bag down before turning in the direction that led to his rack. Seconds later, he bent and seated her on the mattress. “Hold on a minute.” Her arms still wrapped around his neck, Laura remained still, willing her stomach to settle. “Was okay…hold on…”
“It’s all right.” Bill pressed a kiss against the top of her head, waiting until her grip on his shoulder relaxed. “You okay for a minute?”
“A minute.” Laura remained still, eyes closed as she released him. Still trying to get her stomach to settle, she listened as he moved around his quarters, a soft click as he set a glass down on the shelf next to the rack.
“Here,” he gently started to unbutton her shirt, easing it over her shoulders and letting it slide down her arms as he unfastened her bra. “And arms up…” Carefully, he slid one of his sweatshirts over her head. “Warm enough?”
“Hmm.” Eyes still closed, she nodded slightly as he laid her back.
“Pants again tomorrow?” Setting her shoes out of the way, he quickly finished undressing her, replacing her slacks with the sweatpants he’d found to fit her, since his literally fell off of her.
“Yeah. Pink blouse though. Left it here last week.” While he hung her slacks up and changed, she curled on her side under the covers, letting her thoughts drift as she listened to his movements.
“Here.” Bill perched on the side of the bed and picked up the glass of water. “Don’t fall asleep yet.”
“What.” She opened one eye and groaned when she realized he was holding out a pill. “Don’t want to.”
“Laura.” One eyebrow raised. “Doctors orders. And I promised.”
“Frak.” With a sigh, she propped herself up on an elbow, taking the glass of water from him and opening her mouth so he could place the pill inside. Following it with a gulp of water, she dropped her head back and swallowed.
“That’s one reason to take your medicine.” At the unexpected statement, Laura’s eyes flew back to his face, choking slightly as he chuckled. “Not tonight though.”
She swallowed again, the pill finally going all the way down before she could answer. “Is that a challenge?”
“No way.” Retrieving the glass from her hand, he returned it to the shelf and slid into the rack next to her. “Cottle would have both of our heads.”
“Wouldn’t be the first time.” She giggled softly, cuddling into him, her icy hands sliding up under his top.
”Laura!” He winced. “A little warning first?”
“Not as much fun.” Eyes closed, she sighed happily. “Much better here than in Sick Bay. More comfortable.”
“Agreed.” Reaching up, he switched the light off, leaving the rack bathed in the dim light from the lamp on his desk. They’d learned that both of them slept better with the dim light instead of complete darkness, as well as making it safer when he had to get her to the head as quickly as possible. “All right?”
“Mmm.” She pressed closer to him. “Getting warmer, which is as good as it can get for now.”
“Stomach okay?” Rubbing her back, he tightened his grip on her.
“No, but manageable.” Laura sighed and remained silent for a few minutes before speaking again, her voice strangely soft and uncertain. “Bill?”
“Hmm?” He glanced down at her. “Up?”
“No.” She traced absent designs on his chest. “Can I tell you something?”
”Something, anything, everything. You know that.” Bill frowned slightly as she took a deep breath. “Laura?”
“It’s stupid. I mean, with everything else…everything we are going through, it’s so stupid.” Her fingers continued their absent pattern, her voice missing its accustomed confidence. “Petty…we are dealing with, well, everything, evading and fighting, trying to find Earth, the problems in the fleet, and it’s so stupid…”
“Nothing that bothers you is petty.” At least it took her mind off of the problems of the Fleet, Baltar, Zarek, the Cylons…Starbuck, for a few minutes at least. “Out with it, Roslin.”
She took a deep breath. “I told you, it’s stupid.” Her fingers stilled as she shifted slightly, ducking her head and mumbling something into his chest.
“What?” With a finger, he tilted her chin up so he could see her face. “Laura?”
“I said.” Laura sighed, her eyes sliding past his shoulder. “I said, it’s stupid, but I miss my hair.”
“Your…” he blinked. “Laura, it will grow back.”
“Not the same.” She sighed. “I told you, petty, stupid, and vain. With all the problems out there, I don’t need to be wasting time missing my hair.”
Bill hesitated. Fleet issues, policy issues, even dealing with Lee were all things he knew something about dealing with, but…Laura and her hair? Completely out of his league. “Laura…it’s not stupid. It was beautiful…I mean, will be beautiful again.”
Surprising him, she laughed softly. “You know, I once told Billy he didn’t know anything about women. I’d made a comment on only having three outfits for the rest of my life, he said it was fine.”
”He was a fine young man.” Bill smiled sadly, “I’m still sorry…”
“I know.” Reaching up, she cupped his cheek. “We talked it out, I still miss him though. However, you’re not much better than he was in some aspects.”
“Really?” He reached up to clasp her hand. “I’m not sure how to take that.”
“Remember when we first met, my very proper hair?” Laura shifted to lie on her back, gazing up at the ceiling. “My proper, political hair? Couldn’t look too frivolous, always presenting the frakking appearance of being the proper Secretary of Education, one that you could trust with your children’s future.” She sighed. “Trimmed, styled…”
“It was short?” He offered weakly, earning him a sideways glance. “Well?”
“It was. And then…” she smiled wanly, “well, after the attack, I was busy, and it grew out, got long. I liked it long, but Rich…the President and his consultants said it didn’t present the correct political appearance for what his Cabinet needed to portray. So, for the last few years, I’d done what they told me to. I was a successful Secretary of Education, I was able to do a lot of good, institute programs that positively impacted all the colonies…influence students…so, my hair was a small price to pay. So to speak.”
“Okay…” Bill tried to remember the briefing pictures he’d glanced at several years ago, prior to her arrival.
“It’s all right.” Laura smiled slightly, “I told you it was stupid. But, as it grew out, I liked it. And there wasn’t anyone to tell me how to improve my political standing by changing my appearance.” At the low mumble from beside her, she looked at him. “What?”
He sighed, the inadvertent comment having slipped out. “I said, I did notice your legs.”
She giggled softly and leaned toward him, resting her chin on his shoulder. “I know. I caught you a few times.”
“You’re more than legs and hair, you know.” Bill touched her nose lightly. “You have a brilliant…”
“The next word out of your mouth better be mind.” She stopped him with a finger on his lips.
“Of course it was.” He kissed her finger. “Go on.”
She took a deep breath, letting her finger run along his cheek and down to rest on his chest again as she curled against him. “Gods, remember it on New Caprica? The little bit of sun we had…I actually had highlights. Don’t worry, I don’t expect you to know what they are.”
“Are those the little strands of blonde and light red that ran through your hair?” He tilted his head, watching her face. “I noticed those. Liked them.”
“Good enough.” Laura smiled. “And I was just a teacher, I could let it get as long as I wanted it to…”
“It was beautiful.” Bill nodded slightly, “you cut it when you became President again, right?”
“Good eye, Admiral.” She toyed with the fringe of her scarf. “I had it trimmed a bit. Tory arranged it with whoever she had do her hair, when she used to get it done.”
“She’ll come around.” Shaking his head slightly, he sighed, “I know you’ve been frustrated with her lately…I’m hoping it’s just a stage…I don’t want her to…”
“To hurt me?” Laura’s eyes cut up to meet his face, “it’s come close, politically, a few times. Personally, I don’t know what’s going through her mind now, she made it through so much, and now it just seems as though she’s crumbling…”
“She’ll come around.” He repeated gently, “eventually.”
“I hope so. I have this feeling…I may need your assistance with something eventually about her, needing to know where she’s going. She’s changed. But, back to the topic at hand…” She returned her gaze to the ceiling. “So, I finally had the hair I always dreamed of having. Long, wavy…and then…”
“Is that why you chose that wig?” Bill glanced at the wig stand, just in view on a shelf next to the head. “Shorter, no waves?”
“Hmm?” Following his gaze, Laura frowned, “no, actually it was the only one close to my hair color. Trust me, despite what I may have said a few years ago, I do not look good as a blonde.” At his chuckle, she hit him lightly. “Shut up, or I bring up the mustache.”
“Hey, I liked my mustache.” He tried to defend it.
“Bill, your face is much better open, like it is now.” She traced a finger along his cheek. “And what would you do without your shaving ritual?”
With a sigh, he capitulated. “Fine. But, your hair will grow back. You’ve only got a few more treatments…”
“I know. It’s stupid.” Laura returned her gaze to the ceiling. “But…”
“You’ve nothing to hide behind now.” Bill reached out and traced around her face. “You’re exposed…you’re afraid to twist a strand around your finger as you think, you’re afraid to tuck it behind your ear…you’re afraid it will slide and you won’t notice…”
“Yeah.” Tears started to well up in her eyes. “I mean, sometimes I get so mad at myself, because losing my hair is so little, so petty compared to what we’ve all lost, but I’m so tired, Bill. I fight and I fight, and I can’t…I’m not me…I’m just the President…and I can’t…” With a muffled sob, she rolled, burying her face into his chest as he held her.
“Shh.” Completely at a loss, he murmured against her head. “Shh, Laura, it’s all right. Shh…” Continuing to rub her back and make occasional soothing murmurs until she finally relaxed against him, the medicine taking effect, Bill sighed. Her hair? This wasn’t anything he was prepared to deal with…Cylons, Viper or Raptor problems, pilots out of control, that was what he knew.
Although, come to think of it…since she’d started wearing the wig, she had been more…he couldn’t really put his finger on it, harsher wasn’t the word, but, the only time he really saw Laura was when they were together, alone…and she wasn’t…she wasn’t wearing the wig. “Well, frak.” He grimaced, he really didn’t mind the wig, except when she chose to hide behind it, he thought she was just as beautiful with the scarf, her eyes expressive…He really did feel as inept as he remembered Billy being around Dee…his lips curved up. Dualla. Perhaps he’d speak with her tomorrow…get some of those insights he didn’t seem to have. Although, he had loved Laura’s hair, it had only been a part of her….when she sighed softly and nestled into him, he tightened his arms around her and closed his eyes, following her into sleep while they could before the nausea that accompanied every treatment appeared again.
The next day, Bill glanced around the CIC and caught his daughter in law’s eye. “Lieutenant, a word?”
”Yes sir?” She moved to join him, a confused look on her face as he beckoned her to follow him to the upper level overlooking the CIC. “Sir?”
“Lieutenant.” He cleared his throat. “Duella.”
“Is something wrong Admiral?” She leaned toward him, frowning as he glanced around to make sure there was no one else in earshot. “Sir?”
“I need…a…” he sighed, “I need your opinion and some help on something.”
“Of course sir, anything,” Dee smiled. “You know that.”
“All right.” He coughed softly and took a deep breath. “The President…”
When he didn’t continue, she tilted her head, watching him. “Yes?”
Bill sighed. “The President…and I…were talking, last night.” He glanced around the CIC, he was an Admiral for frak’s sake, not a nugget…. “She…made a comment…about her hair.” His eyes moved toward hers, expecting to see amusement, but finding compassion instead. “Losing her hair.”
“She had beautiful hair.” Dee stated softly, nodding. “The wig doesn’t suit her…it’s almost as she’s changing her public appearance to suit the wig, harsher…begging your pardon sir. It’s not a criticism of her, just an observation. When we’ve spoken privately, she’s not as…well, the wig isn’t an influence. Sir.”
“That’s her opinion as well.” He let out a sigh, “I don’t understand it, and yet I can…I know she needs it to feel Presidential, it’s part of her armor, but she loses Laura when she puts the wig on. And I want to help her with that, but don’t know how.” He winced, “she stated I was a close second to Billy on understanding women.”
Dee laughed, muffling the sound quickly, “he was learning, but I see her point. Sir.” Crossing her arms, she glanced down as Laura, surrounded by several Quorum and security team members entered the CIC. “And…I see what you mean.” Watching, she waited as Laura glanced around, her gaze landing on them briefly until Bill nodded and held up a finger, then returned her attention to Saul Tigh, who was speaking to the Quorum members. “So what you want to do, is let the President feel more like Laura again?”
Bill let out a sigh of relief. “Something like that. I need to…well, any suggestions you could give me would be welcome. I like her in red, but I’m not exactly sure…well, what would work.”
“Of course.” Dee leaned on the railing, gazing down at the group in the center of the room, thinking as she watched them. With a decisive nod, she straightened. “I know.”
“Well?” He watched her expectantly.
”Sir, I think it might be better for both of us, as well as her, if I take care of this.” Dee met his eyes levelly. “I’ll catch the shuttle this afternoon, be back tonight. But, you have to handle Lee if wants to know where I’m going.”
“Do I want to know where you’re going?” Bill raised an eyebrow. “You’re not going to do anything foolish are you?”
“Nope. Just take Racetrack and do some shopping. At the market.” Dee grinned. “I’ll bill you for it when we get back.”
“You’re going to buy her something?” He looked dubious. “What?”
“Just trust me for now, sir.” With a salute, she turned and moved away from him as Laura climbed the stairs. “Madame President.”
“Lieutenant.” Laura smiled warmly. “Good to see you again.”
”Likewise.” She eyed Laura closely then nodded toward Bill. “Go easy on him Ma’am, I just had a few questions for him.”
“Very well.” With a nod, Laura continued to his side. “Hi there.”
“Hello.” Unseen by watchers below, he moved his hand to her lower back, caressing it gently. “You feeling all right?”
“As well as can be expected.” She smiled wanly, “we’re scheduled to be here in the CIC for another few minutes then back to the Quorum meeting.”
“You’re taking it easy?” Bill frowned, turning to face her.
“I’m sitting, and haven’t thrown anything at anyone. Yet.” Laura sighed. “Cottle cleared it. Then I have to go back to Colonial One for a few hours. I’ll be back on the Galactica by dinner time. I think I agreed to have dinner with some pilots tonight.”
“You going to be up to it?” Eyeing her face, his frown deepened.
“I’ll make it short.” She smiled slightly. “The good thing is, the pilots are the only people that are almost as overprotective as you are. Hot Dog and Racetrack will keep it simple. And I like spending time with them.”
“So I’ll see you tonight then?” Bill glanced down at the main floor of the CIC, watching the group that was waiting for her.
“Come to dinner with me?” Laura offered, “that way, if I’m tired, you can pull rank, and you can see for yourself that they won’t let me overdo it.”
“Call me when you’re heading back.” His eyes moved toward her lips, watching as they curved. “Yeah, me too.”
”See you.” With a final nod, she stepped back, returning to the lower deck cautiously, as he watched her go.
That night, he was headed to the Pilot’s Mess when he heard footsteps running toward him. “Sir?” Racetrack fell in step with him. “Lieutenant Duella asked me to give you a message.”
“Very well?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Well, we were successful, she’s leaving you a package on your desk in your quarters. Let one of us know if…well, you need a different, uh size.” She blushed, an unexpected look on her face.
”Do I want to know what’s in the package?” They paused outside the mess entrance.
Racetrack winced, “I’d rather not go into that with you sir. But, I think you and the President will appreciate it.”
“I see.” He eyed her for another moment and sighed. “Very well.” Shaking his head, he opened the hatch, smiling at the sight of Laura surrounded by Viper pilots, glasses off as she finished whatever it was in the glass they’d handed her, a cheer going up as she slammed the glass back on the table.
Hot Dog was the first to notice them, “Sir, Admiral…” they shot to their feet.
“As you were.” He nodded and moved into the room, Racetrack following him. “Pilots, Madame President.”
“Admiral.” She smiled at him and indicated the chair next to hers. “Join us.”
“Thank you.” Seating himself, he glanced at the glass in front of her. “What’s this?”
“We were just, um…” Laura shrugged, “toasting.”
“Toasting?” His gaze swept the table. “What?”
“Me.” She smiled, and he noticed that she actually had some color in her cheeks, hopefully not from whatever it was he’d just seen her drink. ”Um, yes sir.” Hot Dog spoke up, “and we cleared what she could drink with Doc Cottle.”
“You did?” Bill blinked.
“Yes sir.” He nodded, “I mean, we couldn’t toast a new call sign without it, and we’d had the dinner planned for several weeks now…”
“Apparently, Tory told them I had a very busy schedule.” Laura frowned. “Need to speak to her about that.”
Hot Dog grinned, “no need, you’re welcome anytime you can get away. You know that, Tangle.”
“Tangle?” Bill blinked in surprise. “Your call sign is Tangle?”
“Yep, as in don’t tangle with Madame President.” One of the other pilots grinned, “we figured the obvious ones would be over done. We wanted one that was ours to give.”
“Apparently, Airlock isn’t so politically correct.” Laura shrugged and reached for the glass that had just been set down in front of Bill.
“Mine.” He deftly removed it from her hand and lifted it, waiting as the other pilots mimicked him with hastily filled glasses. “To Tangle, may we never have to with her.”
“So say we all!” They yelled in unison then downed the drink as she watched, eyes bright.
“So say we all.” Chuckling, he set the glass down. “However…”
“However.” Standing, she sighed. “I have an early briefing in the morning ladies and gentlemen. Thank you for a delightful evening.”
“Thank you for coming.” Hot Dog held up a hand, “hold on though.” As they paused, he held out a package for her. “Your Call Sign plaque.”
“My…” Blinking back the sudden tears that had formed, Laura gently took the paper wrapped package and carefully opened it. “Oh…” She held it so Bill could look over her shoulder at the picture, a candid one of her raising the champagne bottle in front of the Blackbird, Bill and Chief Tyrol framing her. “It’s wonderful.”
“Well, we didn’t really have one of you in your own Viper, so we figured this was closest.” Racetrack smiled at her.
“Thank you.” Clasping the picture to her chest, Laura gazed around the room, “thank you all.”
“Our pleasure, Tangle.” Hot Dog grinned. “And, you’re welcome to hide out in here any time.”
“I’ll keep that in mind next time I need a bunk.” She smiled at them. “Or a hideout.”
“At least I’ll know where to find her.” Bill chuckled and touched her arm. “Madame President?”
“Admiral.” With a final smile around the room, she exited, waiting until the hatch closed behind them to smile up at him. “Did you know?”
“Didn’t have a clue.” Glancing at her, he smiled back. “May I?”
”Oh, yes.” Tucking her arm through his, she held out the picture. “So much has happened since then.”
”Indeed.” Bill looked at the picture as they walked along the corridor. “I really thought you were going to hit it with the bottle.”
She giggled softly, “I wouldn’t have done that. But, it was fun. I remember that much.”
“Good.” He smiled, “I like the call sign too.”
“A bit confusing, but I like it. It’s different.” Laura paused as he stepped ahead of her to open the hatch. “Thank you gentlemen.” With a final nod to her guard, she stepped through the hatch.
“You stand relieved, gentlemen.” Indicating his guard, he dismissed her escort. “The President will be leaving for her meeting at zero seven hundred hours.”
”Yes sir.” With a nod, they waited until the hatch closed before turning and moving down the corridor.
Bill continued into his quarters. “How are you feeling?”
“Tired. Cold.” She sighed, tying the scarf around her head as she returned from placing her wig on its stand. Her eyes met his before she sank down onto the couch. “The normal. But, I needed that. You know most of them are just an extension of you. Younger, less tempered with time, but, I needed them tonight. With most of them…it’s a duality that I can appreciate, share.”
“A duality?” Pouring two glasses of water, he glanced at the brown paper wrapped parcel placed inconspicuously on the edge of his desk. Ignoring it for the time being, he carried the water over to her, handing her a glass before picking up the blanket that lay folded on the back of the couch and draping it over her. Setting the other glass on the table in front of the couch, he opened her case and handed her the pile of folders on top. “Laura? Duality?”
“Hmm? Oh, yes.” Frowning at the pile of folders, she sighed. “The wild, carefree personalities, the focused killers. I’ve heard them during battles, I’ve lived with some of them through New Caprica. I’ve prayed over pictures of the ones we’ve lost. They are our future, our past.” Her eyes met his as he settled down next to her with his own pile of folders. “Our present. They remember me as not only the President, but also as the schoolteacher, the woman who stood next to some of them in ration lines, they’ve seen me at my worst, throwing up in their raptors, knelt next to me in the Memory corridor. They give me hope. And I believe in them.” She finished simply then giggled softly. “Way too maudlin. On one shot of ambrosia.” She glanced at Bill, one eyebrow raised. “Which they received permission from Cottle to give me.”
“So they said.” Bill watched her take a sip of water before setting the glass on the table next to her. “Did you eat tonight?”
“Some.” She shrugged and opened the top folder. “I’ve been nibbling all day when I feel like it. Stashed some crackers in my bag. So, don’t worry, I know better.” At the soft snort from the other side of the couch, she glanced up. “Usually.”
“That’s better.” He threw her a grin before returning his attention to his own folder.
Several hours later, not having heard any comments or questions from her for several minutes, Bill glanced over to see Laura sleeping, the last folder she held in danger of slipping to the floor. Leaning over, he rescued it just before the papers fell out, and set it on top of the pile she’d already completed before returning his attention to the folder he held. When he finished, he carefully placed all their files on the table in front of the couch, eyeing the four piles warily. Fortunately both of the completed files were significantly larger than the ones neither had looked at, which meant with any amount of luck, they could finish in the morning. With a sigh, he turned to look at Laura, gazing at the weary lines in her face. She did look slightly more relaxed than usual, which meant she was dozing with little pain or nausea, a small blessing or a sign of the tolerance that he knew she’d built up.
Following their conversation of the previous night, he was glad that she’d had the opportunity to relax tonight, and from the comments he’d heard, or those that had been passed on to him, he knew that the pilots respected her, no small feat for someone who didn’t fly, or wasn’t even in the military. Chuckling, he tried to imagine her as a pilot, and couldn’t. She wouldn’t have been a pilot for long anyway, not with the way her mind worked. The brass would have tagged her for a strategist early on and pulled her off the front lines. Although, not having known her when she was younger, he really didn’t know. How much of who she was today was what she’d already survived and lived before the Cylon attack, and how much was out of necessity since the attack. What had Laura the young teacher been like? He’d seen glimmers the few times he’d watched her with children, unguarded and encouraging, taking the time to prod them to find the answers on their own, to make each one feel special…
What was it she’d said the previous night, something about how she felt harder, harsher…didn’t like what she’d had to become, and missed who she’d been? Didn’t know who she’d become? Bill shook his head, he’d seen her face when he’d walked in tonight, the life and light as she’d laughed at some probably inappropriate joke. She hadn’t been the President tonight, for just a brief time, she’d been Laura. Or as they affectionately referred to her, ‘Madame Prez’. But even in the affection and raucous laughter, there’d been respect for her. A protective shell for her. Which didn’t mean they wouldn’t question her decisions, or always understand her orders, but did mean that most of them understood…they understood that while having to watch everything that happened, when they were out fighting, they were part of the battle, and someone else was watching the war. And somehow, they’d come to trust her to watch the war. As they trusted him.
”Stop staring at me.” At the soft whisper, he focused on her, not surprised to see her eyes were still closed. At his chuckle, she smiled. “You know I can tell.”
“Likewise.” Leaning over, he brushed a kiss across her lips. “Ready to go to bed?”
“Requires moving. Warm and comfortable now.” She murmured, shifting slightly against the leather couch. “Stay here?”
“You’ll wake up with a sore back, remember?” Standing, he crossed to the rack and turned the covers down before retrieving her sweatshirt and pants, leaving them on the rack. “Shower?”
“Hmm?” Her eyes opened. “Shower?”
“Come along Tangle.” Having turned the water on, he returned to the couch and looked down at her.
“Shower.” Laura sighed, “since I’m awake.” Extending one arm, she waited for him to grasp it, helping her stand. “I am awake, right?”
“I think so.” Chuckling, he slid an arm around her waist, leading her toward the head. “Can you make it on your own?”
“Yeah.” Brushing a kiss against his cheek, she smiled sleepily at him. “I’ll call you if I start to feel faint.”
“You better.” He frowned slightly at her, remembering the evening after one of her treatments a few weeks earlier when he’d heard first a thud, followed by a louder crash and her cry as she’d slipped and fallen against the sink, knocking the items on top off as she fell to the floor. He’d found her leaning against the wall, the towel pulled hastily over her body, one hand pressed to her forehead where she’d cut it open slightly. “When you start to feel it, not on your way down.”
“I promise.” She smiled and picked up the clothes he’d set out for her then stepped into the head, swinging the door shut, but leaving it slightly ajar, another agreement they’d come to so he could hear her if she needed anything. It also enabled them to continue any conversations they’d started. He’d also agreed to leave the door ajar when he was in the head, since as she’d pointed out, he still needed to hear her.
After waiting a moment, Bill moved across the room and quietly opened the package on his desk. When he realized that he was now holding a delicate set of red lingerie, he blinked, glancing first at the head to make sure the water was still running, then back down at the items he held. And his daughter in law had picked these out? Still…a smile crossed his face. Even if she only wore them occasionally…Realizing the water had shut off, he quickly rewrapped them in the paper and placed the parcel in his desk just as she called his name.
“What’s wrong?” He moved toward the head, unbuttoning his jacket and dropping it on the rack as he passed by.
“Nothing.” As he swung the door open, she glanced at him. “Really Bill, sometimes I just think of something to ask you, it’s not always an emergency.”
“Just checking.” He managed a smile. “What is it?”
”My picture.” Closing the bottle of lotion she’d just used, Laura smiled at him. “Could we find a place in here for it? My quarters on Colonial One…well, I’d just rather it be here. Where we can see it.”
“How about next to mine.” Bill suggested, moving to the side as she passed him.
“You have one?” She frowned a moment, then laughed. “Of course you do. You’ll hang them next to each other?”
“I’ll find a place for both of them.” He watched her absently pick up his jacket and smooth the wrinkles before hanging it next to the suit she’d just taken off. “You took your meds?”
“Not yet. I’ll take them in a minute.” With a sigh, she glanced at the table in the living area. “We still have files to go through, don’t we?”
”We can get to them in the morning.” Bending, he untied his boots and placed them in the closet.
“No, I’d rather finish them tonight.” Laura raised an eyebrow. “However….”
“What?” Bill glanced at her.
“Go on, shower,” she smiled innocently at him and waved her hand in his direction. “Really.”
“What are you up to?” His eyes narrowed as he watched her, perched on the edge of the rack.
“Nothing.” With a giggle, she shrugged her shoulders. “I’m going to get a glass of water and take my meds, look at a few reports. That’s all.”
“Right.” He sighed. “Call me if you need anything.”
“I will.” She smiled again, waiting until he’d entered the head before sliding off the rack. Padding over to the couch, she picked up the two smaller stacks of reports and carried them back to the rack, setting one stack carefully on the table next to the rack, the other in the center of the mattress. Retrieving a glass of water, she obediently shook out the meds she was supposed to take and swallowed them with a grimace. By the time Bill emerged from the head, she was propped up in the rack, resting against pillows she’d taken from the couch, studying the reports she had left.
“Interesting compromise.” He chuckled at the sight.
“Thought so.” Laura nodded at the pile on the table. “Those are yours, Admiral.”
“Very well.” Clicking the light off in the head, he moved to join her, settling under the covers as she edged over. “Meds?”
”Yes sir, Admiral sir.” She peered over her glasses at him. “Taken as ordered, sir.”
”Good.” He picked up his stack of folders, chuckling as she shifted again, leaning her back against his chest. “Comfortable?”
“Mmm hmm.” Engrossed by her report, she nodded absently, making a notation in the margin.
With a chuckle, he opened the first folder in his stack and began to read. Sometime later, he glanced down to realize that she was once again sound asleep. Carefully, he closed his report and returned it to the table before picking up her stack and setting it at right angles on top of his. Slipping her glasses off, he set them on top of the folders, his next to them before wrapping his arm around her slender body and shifting them so they were lying under the covers, his smile widening as she murmured something unintelligible and curled into him. Reaching up, he switched the light off and closed his eyes.