*locked from Janus*
I don't know what to do.
I hate feeling like this. I hate it. All this bullshit swirls around me and I can't stop it. I can't help it. I can't help anyone.
And I want to help, and now Janus is so fucking mad at me for wanting that.
Why can't he not do that?
...
I don't want to be stupidly brave to the point I'll die. I just want to be able to protect myself and my friends. I don't want to feel like he does. I couldn't handle it. I can't handle it.
And I can't sit around and make sure everyone's feelings are okay. They'd probably feel a whole lot better if they didn't know someone - someone who really would love it - can just walk all over us whenever he likes.
I know it'd make me feel better.
I hate feeling like this. I hate it. All this bullshit swirls around me and I can't stop it. I can't help it. I can't help anyone.
And I want to help, and now Janus is so fucking mad at me for wanting that.
Why can't he not do that?
...
I don't want to be stupidly brave to the point I'll die. I just want to be able to protect myself and my friends. I don't want to feel like he does. I couldn't handle it. I can't handle it.
And I can't sit around and make sure everyone's feelings are okay. They'd probably feel a whole lot better if they didn't know someone - someone who really would love it - can just walk all over us whenever he likes.
I know it'd make me feel better.