Fic: Privacy, A Series of Scenes
Title: Privacy, A Series of Scenes
Author: AngelicSinner / VixenRaign
Pairing: Kahlan/Cara (pre-slash for now, but nearly there!), previous Richard/Kahlan, one-sided Dahlia->Cara
Rating: G - R (light-ish-PG-13 this time)
Warnings: Contains Femslash, and my rampant reinterpretation of how things may have gone after the end of Season Two. (Also contains reoccurring non-sexy voyeurism {aka “spying”}, and the odd/occasional actually-sexy-voyeurism, both usually by Kahlan. ‘Cause that Mother Confessor? She’s a snoop!)
Disclaimer: I do not own “Legend of the Seeker”, not do I even own copies of the “Sword of Truth” book series. They belong to Terry Goodkind, ABC and Disney TV. I make no profit, nor would I like to. This is all in good fun.
Author’s Note: I’ve always been fascinated by people, the way they are when they are alone with just one other person; who they allow themselves to be in the company of a trusted friend. The secret parts of themselves they reveal to just one, the way that brings them closer and allows them to understand each other in ways others could not…
Summery: Post “Tears”/Season 2. Life is complicated. So are people. And to quote a great comic book, “The thing about changing the world? Once you do it, the world’s all different.”
Time-Line:
angelicsinner.livejournal.com/9250.html
Takes place after “Witness”
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Scene Summery: Kahlan ran away. She always does from this sort of thing, from how afraid she’s been made of herself. But she doesn’t get far before Cara finds her. And the Confessor’s thoughts were never far from Cara.
Kahlan found herself back in Cara's chair by the fire. Her flesh felt tight and almost burned with the sharpness of the cold, but it didn't reach much deeper than her skin. It was as though, after witnessing what she had, there was some internal barrier between the harshness of her rooms and the bubbling heat that simmered inside of her. There was a heaviness, a radiating warmth from deep in the Confessor’s belly, low, between her hips. She sat with her top-quilt wrapped about her shoulders, her bare feet on the ground felt like ice, but it was as though she could not focus on it, as though it was more of a memory than anything immediate.
The Confessor's mind reeled. She could not get the images of what she'd seen from the forefront of her thoughts. Each time they would replay, it was as though her mind would add another piece, bringing it from what she saw to the boarder of fantasy. In one Cara had called to her instead of the spirits... In another, Cara's eyes had turned towards the door after she'd collapsed, bonelessly, and did not turn away when she saw Kahlan watching her.
Her body shivered, the impulse coming from deeper than any cold could ever reach. She closed her eyes, but the images just kept assaulting her. She felt haunted.
What would she think of me, if she knew, her mind wondered, and her fingers grasped the edges of the quilt even tightter. Would she ever look at me the same way again? Kahlan didn't know what she'd do, if she ever lost what she had with Cara. She cursed herself for being so foolish, for falling for the Mord'Sith.
But she is kind, and sweet, and she cares so much for Lilly, her heart reminded. She makes me laugh more than I ever have, she is not afraid of my touch, to tease me despite my station... She sighed, and felt her eyes start to burn with the start of tears. She forced them open, staring hard into the flames. Falling for the Seeker in the middle of his greatest quest was foolish, her angry mind thought as she roughly wiped the tears from her eyes before they could even fall, falling for a Mord'Sith, whom loving would kill and not just Confess? Kahlan let out a bitter, pitiful laugh.
"Creator, why did you make me this way?" She asked the empty room, and even the logs in the fireplace were silent, "Why would you show me such wonderful people, whom I could never have?" She choked out, her voice rough, vision blurring. She wiped the tears away again, her body pulling tighter into itself. She took deep breaths, forcing her body to calm. The sadness receded to numbness, down into the dark, but the heat lingered despite her best efforts.
Long moments later she saw the door to her room ease open out of the corner of her eye. And there she was, standing just inside her doorway, in only her sleeping shift and a concerned look on her face. Kahlan swallowed, forcing her eyes back to the fire.
"Mother Confessor, what are you doing?" She sounded almost reprimanding. "It is freezing!" She groused, approaching her where she sat. Kahlan nodded vaguely, trying to think of a way to explain. Cara kneeled down in front of her, forcing her attention away from the fire. Kahlan accidentally saw down the front of her shift, and her mind remembering the shape of Cara’s breasts, the color of her nipples, the warm look of her skin. She forced herself to look away. "Kahlan, why are you here?" the blonde asked more delicately.
"I don't feel well," She answered quickly, the roughness still lingering in her voice, she thought, helping to make it more convincing. Cara tilted her head to the side, her face becoming stern.
"So you decided to sit in a frigid room, alone, with your bare feet on the frozen floor?" She asked sarcastically, and Kahlan wished she'd picked a different excuse. "Thank goodness Richard is the ruler of D'Hara and not you, with that sort of logic." She grumbled. Kahlan blushed.
"I just don't want to get you sick," She muttered. Cara stood quickly.
"Too bad for me," She nearly growled. "Because you are not staying here, Mother Confessor." She took Kahlan's arm and pulled her upright. The Confessor tried to resist.
"Cara, really, I don't think,"
"Kahlan!" The Mord'Sith said sharply, looking concerned, "For goodness sakes, you're not staying here, it's too cold! You'll come to my room and sleep there, and if you absolutely insist, then I will make myself a place to sleep by the fire." She said in a rush, her cheeks ruddy with aggravation and cold. "If you are sick, let me care for you. You shouldn't be banished to some freezing room alone!" She chuckled mirthlessly.
Kahlan's cheeks both burned and ached with embarrassment and cold. Cara reached out and took her hand, leading Kahlan out of her bedchambers. She pulled the Confessor along as she walked them through Lilly's rooms and then into her own-- but all Kahlan could think about was the hand in hers, and where it had been just a short time ago. Her entire torso seemed to ache at this, and for conflicting reasons.
Cara, for a second time that night, shoved her to sitting; this time onto the bed of the Mord'Sith. Kahlan wrapped her quilt more tightly around herself, glancing behind her, and trying to will her mind to stop showing her things that would only make her being here harder. When she looked back, the blonde was eying her carefully. She squirmed under the scrutiny.
"You don't look well," she began slowly, "But you were just sitting in that room like that for who knows how long." She put the backs of her fingers to either of Kahlan's cheeks gently, and without thinking she leaned into them. When they were gone, she closed her eyes. She took a deep breath. "How do you feel?"
"Warm." She answered, eyes opening again to focus on the folds of the blanket around her. "I guess I didn't realize how cold it was in my room, really." She offered quietly, by way of an apology. Cara leaned down to a knee again, to catch her eye. Kahlan took a slow breath through her nose, refusing to let her gaze wonder anywhere but those sea-green eyes looking back at her.
Cara didn't flinch, didn't relent, didn't blink... Part of Kahlan's abilities as a Confessor was in her power to see the Truth in people; most found such a gaze unnerving. Cara, however, never backed down from a challenge, and relied on her keen observations to both survive and succeed. She actually possessed a similarly hard, penetrating stare, now that she thought about it. But suddenly the blonde's features broke into a slow grin. Kahlan was so surprised she blinked.
"What?" She asked hesitantly. Cara's grin grew into a smirk. "What?" She asked more insistently. Cara just started laughing. "What is so funny?" She asked, now a little prickly. Cara only laughed harder, before looking back at her, then started laughing again. "Keeper's sake! What is so-"
"Kahlan!" She cut in, her chuckling dying down as she moved to take a seat next to the Confessor. "Is it really taking you this long to tell me you're aroused?" Cara asked, incredulous. Kahlan froze, her body going stiff. Cara just laughed again. "Oh Creator you are." She laughed, shaking her head.
"Cara," Kahlan snapped, annoyed at the blonde for her behavior.
"Mother Confessor, why did you not just tell me?" She insisted, her amusement still lingering in her voice. Kahlan blushed harder than she could ever remember before. Cara merely shook her head, sighing, though there was a wicked smile of her face. Kahlan knew she would be teased mercilessly for this. And that is half the reason I did not tell you! she wanted to shout at her.
"Kahlan, do you not know me well enough by now to know I would not judge you for this?" She asked, curiously. Kahlan just sighed, pinched her eyes shut tight and shook her head. "To be frank, I wondered if perhaps giving birth had finished your ability to feel such things-- I've never heard you speak of it, nor ever to show such signs before now." She noted, chuckling. Kahlan flushed scarlet until her cheeks hurt. "I'm glad to see otherwise- you are only 26, Confessor." She said as though having to remind her.
"You must have been a formidable Mord'Sith, Cara," Kahlan said diplomatically, "because you are merciless and certainly do enjoy torturing Confessors." Cara laughed, but not as much as Kahlan had expected her to at her little joke. When she looked at her, the blonde was looking down at her hands where they rested on her legs, her smile not as wide as it was, though still genuine. "I'm sorry I lied to you."
"You did not lie," Cara insisted, waving her hand dismissively, almost reassuringly, before turning to look at her, "You weren't feeling well. You were just vague about what you were feeling." She offered playfully. Kahlan dropped her head down, trying not to smile. "You could have told me. If you did not know that an hour ago, then I hope you'll know it now. This is not something I would feel embarrassed about."
"But I would." Kahlan reminded her. Cara just shrugged.
"But I do not, and for me to hear this about you, I think it is a good thing. So you have no reason to feel that way with me, Mother Confessor." She offered. Then Cara moved to get up.
"Where are you going?" Kahlan asked quickly, as Cara grabbed her Journey Book and headed towards the door to Lilly's room. The blonde glanced over she shoulder.
"I'll be by the fire, just next door," She told her slowly, and significant glint in her eye that Kahlan didn't know how to interpret. "I'll give you about an hour." Just as Cara was pulling the door open, her implications clicked.
"Wait - what?" Kahlan whispered urgently. Cara sighed, closing the door, her head dropping forward. Slowly she turned around. "Are you suggesting...?"
"Kahlan," Cara said slowly, not unlike the way she explained things to Lilly. "Your rooms are too cold, I am not letting you sleep in them no matter what you say. And if you tried to accomplish... this?" she said, waving at her vaguely for the Confessor's sake, "In your own rooms? It would take even longer. This way we may both get some sleep before dawn." she finished teasingly. Kahlan felt her ears and neck burn with the force of her blush this time.
"But this is your bed," Kahlan refuted lamely.
"Mother Confessor," Cara said, leaning back against the door coolly, "You are not the first woman I've had in my bed before. Though you are the first who has accompanied me in it without achieving release." Kahlan nearly choked on her own tongue when she tried to swallow. Cara just smirked. "I'd like to keep my up 'til now perfect record in tact. My reputation, as you know, means a great deal to me." Kahlan just stared at her, eyes so wide they almost ached.
"One hour." She said significantly, turning towards the door again, "If you need more than that, I may have to intervene." She finished mischievously. Kahlan gave an indignant squawk, which just caused Cara to laugh quietly before closing the door behind her.
Kahlan was left to stare at the door, in mild shock, considering her options. The blanket fell from her shoulders. She hardly even noticed.
~ AngelicSinner / VixenRaign