Take Two - Chapter Three - Destiel Fanfiction
Title: Take Two
Authors: pippin1983 & lotrspnfangirl
Pairing: Destiel, some Cas/Balthazar
Rating: R (may change)
Summary: Dean and Castiel get drunkenly married at 19. It's bold, it's rash, it's being young and in love. After Dean walked out, Castiel tried to move and after ten years, he's decided to marry again. The only thing standing in his way is his legal marriage. Dean, however, wants a second chance to prove that he's grown up, he's matured, but his love for Castiel has never changed.
Warnings/Spoilers: Angsty! Totally AU.
Beta(s): Huge thanks and hugs to oldbatj for working with us on this! Jude, you’re fantastic!
A/N: We own nothing! We are taking these characters and playing with them nicely. Our fic was based off of this prompt.. Bibi primarily wrote Dean and Dani primarily wrote Cas. Our eye banners are used to signify scene changes and not POV, even if they coincide. We just think the boys have pretty eyes <3
You can find Chapter One here.
You can find lotrspnfangirl fiction index here.
You can find pippin1983 fiction index here.
"Hello?" Castiel answered his cell phone, his eyes squinting against the sudden brightness of the screen.
"Hey, baby." Balthazar's voice was low and sleep-ridden as it washed through the phone. "I missed your call last night."
"I'm sorry, my Dad wanted me to watch the game with him and I passed out right after..." He let himself sink back down into the pillows, pulling the comforter up over his head.
"I miss you." Balthazar said softly. "Are you coming home tonight?"
"I don't know yet," Castiel replied, a strange sensation flitting through his stomach. "I have to go see if Dean had time to read over and sign the papers this morning."
"Well, there's not much for him to really consider is there?" Balthazar snorted. "It's not like he wanted a marriage anyways."
"Ouch… Really, Balt?" Cas felt his anger rising, sudden and sharp.
"Babe, I didn't mean it like that. It's his loss and my gain, Castiel. I want this, I want you. For keeps…"
Cas sighed, rubbing a hand over his face.
"I'm sorry, this is just... Harder than I thought." He could hear soft breathing, but Balthazar was quiet on the other end of the line, waiting for him to continue. "I haven't seen him in ten years, and he almost acts like he's the victim. He... Fuck, he has a kid! And my Dad is so excited to have me here..."
"Just do what you need to do, Cas. And then hurry home. I trust you."
Cas' eyes flew open and he pulled the phone back to stare at the screen for a moment. What the hell was that supposed to mean?!
"I have to get to the school, but I'll call you later, okay? Love you, Cas."
"You too." Cas said to the empty line. He let the phone fall from his fingers and sighed. One day here and Castiel already felt like his world was falling apart. He closed his eyes, determined to get a bit more sleep when his phone's alarm started blaring, causing him to jump.
Just his fucking luck.
“Are you ready?” Cas groaned, trying to ignore his boyfriend’s bouncing on the bed. Dean was never up this early, and if he was, he was never this excited.
“Dean… it’s the ass-crack of dawn.” Cas groaned, his head pounding at the sound. “I am hungover, I don’t have to work, and it’s too early.”
“Well, if I had known my husband would be this grumpy in the morning…” Dean snorted, laughter in his voice. Cas froze, eyes flying open. Dean raised an eyebrow, smirking down at him, his green eyes sparkling. “Husband,… didn’t think I would ever say that.”
Slowly, Cas looked down at Dean’s hands pressed against the mattress where he was leaned forward, a simple gold band decorating his left ring finger. He felt his breath hitch and he untangled himself from the blankets, lifting up his own left hand to see a matching band.
“We... “ He squinted at the band on his hand then back at Dean. “We got married?”
“Yeah,” Dean laughed, surging forward to press their lips together. “You don’t remember? We were playing that stupid drinking game Sammy loves so much and you told me you couldn’t imagine your life without me and wanted to spend every day by my side. I told you--”
“That you wouldn’t have it any other way.” Cas echoed slowly, memories breaking through the hungover fog he was in. He remembered the conversation… Hell, he remembered the kiss it had gotten him and the cheering Sam and Jessica had erupted in. Then more shots were poured and…
“I love you.” Dean broke through his thoughts, kissing him gently. Cas smiled against his lips, nodding his head. He didn’t remember, but did that matter? He'd meant every single word.
“Daddy, why’s there more pictures of you and Cas now?” Dorothy asked when they stood in the bathroom, Dean combing her hair.
“Because he was a very close friend and seeing him yesterday reminded me I had more photographs of us and I wanted to see him again, more, even if it’s only photographs.”
“Okay.” She rummaged through her box of scrunchies, setting the ones she wanted today on the side. “Can he be my friend, too? We both met him the same way, so I think he should be my friend too.”
“You should ask him yourself. I cannot make that decision for him.” Dean replied and set the comb aside. “French plait?”
“Yes, please.” Dorothy smiled at her father via the mirror. “But, I don’t know where he lives and I don’t have his phone number. How can I ask him?”
“He’ll come over. You can ask him then.” Dean told her.
“Okay.”
Dorothy beamed at her father and started to hum a song under her breath while he finished her hair. Right as he was putting the last scrunchie in her hair, the doorbell rang.
"Daddy?"
"Go ahead, you can answer it." He smiled at her, kissing the top of her head and picking her up off the stool she sat on to place her on the floor.
"Coming!" She screeched as she ran down the stairs to the front door. Dean paused at the top of the stairs and smiled when he heard his daughter’s delighted squeal. "Hi, Cas!! My daddy and I were just talking about you!"
"Oh?" Cas asked, looking up as Dean made his way down the stairs. "Saying all good things, I hope?"
Dorothy beamed at him and raised a hand, reaching for one of Cas's. Dean smiled when the other man took her small one in his with only a moment’s hesitation.
"Daddy and I were talking and I told him I wanted to be your friend like Daddy is your friend, but I had to ask you first," she babbled as she pulled him into the house. Dean felt his cheeks pink slightly as Cas stared at him.
"Well, I don't think we can exactly be the same friends as me and your Daddy," their visitor said slowly and Dean felt a pang as he watched his daughter's crestfallen expression. Cas immediately knelt down and smiled at her. "I think we can be a better kind of friends."
Dean felt another pang, but this time it was his face that fell. Not that he begrudged his daughter Castiel's friendship. But it felt like Castiel just didn't feel much for Dean at all. Was all the feeling he had left for Dean only anger? Dean sighed lightly.
"Will you stay for breakfast?" Dean offered, feeling a tiny bit like a third wheel with Dot and Castiel bonding here. "I've made bacon and eggs."
“Oh… please, Cas!” Dorothy gasped in childish enthusiasm, tugging on his arm. “We can have our first aww…umm… aw--fishul friend breakfast!” Dean watched a multitude of expressions pass over Castiel’s face before finally settling into a small smile.
“Yeah, I’ll stay.” He said softly, allowing Dorothy to lead him into the small kitchen where three place-settings were ready and waiting.
“Go and wash your hands.” Dean said to his daughter, pushing past them to the stove where he had kept the food warm. She scampered off and an awkward silence fell over the kitchen. “I figured… we could eat and I asked Bobby to pick up Dotty and drop her off at school this morning so we can talk.”
“Sounds fine, Dean.” Castiel said with a sigh, sinking down into one of the chairs at the table.
Dean took a deep breath and brought the food over to the table. Dorothy came bouncing back in and immediately sank into the chair closest to Castiel. Dean chuckled softly. It was nice to see that his daughter liked Cas already and that Cas, too, seemed to like her as well was a good sign. At least Dean hoped it was.
"Daddy makes great bacon." Dorothy said reaching for the plate. "Bacon is my favorite breakfast. My second favorite is Choco-Rice cereal." She helped herself to some bacon and Dean served her some eggs as well. "What’s your favorite breakfast, Cas?"
“I think if I had to choose one favorite breakfast… it would have to be waffles.” He smiled down at her and waited for Dean to sit down before serving himself some food. Dean handed him the pan of eggs and their fingers brushed for a moment, making Castiel gasp out loud and almost yank his hand away. He snapped his eyes up, meeting Dean’s own which were staring at him from across the table.
“Daddy made me waffles once!” Dorothy said, excitedly, the exchange between the two men going completely unnoticed by her. “Did your Daddy make you waffles when you were little like me?”
“Um, yeah… yeah he did.” Cas said, tearing his eyes away from Dean and giving the girl a small smile. “Every Sunday he made waffles.”
Dean knew Castiel had felt it too. There was still something between them and all he could do was hope that Castiel didn't take it as a cue to run off to New York again, but was willing to explore it together with him. Mentally he filed the waffle information away under 'important Castiel info'. If he was lucky, he might be serving waffles for breakfast one day soon.
"My other favorite breakfast is pop-tarts, but Daddy only gives them to me on special days. Next month I will get pop-tarts… Because it's my birthday next month! Will you come to my party?" Dorothy babbled excitedly. “Please?”
"Cas lives far away, little bear." Dean explained to her. "And he has work there, so he might not be able to come." Even if he wished Cas would come, or at least be interested in coming, he didn't want Castiel to feel too badly for saying ‘no’.
"Oh..." Dorothy said slowly, and they could see her mind racing at her father's words. "So if you don't live here, why are you here?" Dean's eyes widened at the question and looked at Cas quickly, opening his mouth to answer but the other man beat him to it.
"I am here visiting my Daddy," he said, meeting Dotty's eyes. "And I figured I would talk to your Daddy about some stuff while I was here."
"I'm glad you get to see your Daddy. I would miss my Daddy so much if I lived so far away!" She gasped and turned to Dean. "I couldn't live without my Papa Bear!"
Dean smiled softly. He was scared of the day when she wouldn't say that anymore.
"I'm sure he couldn't live without you either. I once thought I couldn't live without him." Castiel left it open if he meant his father or Dean, again having two completely different conversations with the two Winchesters.
Dean met Castiel's eyes shortly and sighed in his mind. "Dotty, you should eat, Bobby will be here soon to take you to school."
"Why is Uncle Bobby taking me?" Dorothy frowned, confused.
"Because Cas is here and I want to spend more time with my old friend." Dean bit his lip glancing at Castiel quickly.
"He is my new friend too. I want to spend time too, Daddy. I'll stay at home." Dorothy pouted.
“No, Dorothy.” Dean said, shaking his head. “School is important.”
“Plus, I’m sure you have lots of friends at school who would miss you if you weren’t there.” Castiel added, finishing off a piece of his bacon. Dorothy looked to be seconds away from crying, her lower lip quivering as she looked between the two men at the table. “Don’t you want to see your friends?”
“I guess so…” she said, looking back down at her plate. “Will you be here to see me when I get out of school?”
“Cas probably has to have dinner with his Dad tonight, honey,” Dean said quickly, saving Castiel from having to answer. “Finish up your breakfast, Dotty.”
The disappointed little one looked up at her daddy once more before nodding and starting to eat, the tone in her father’s voice stopping any further conversation. Dean could feel Cas watching him and he exhaled slowly, hating the dread he was already feeling in the pit of his stomach.
They ate in silence and Dean wondered what Castiel was thinking. Did he think Dean was too strict with his daughter? Or did he think Dean was not strict enough? Or was he not thinking about Dean at all, but thinking about who he'd invite to his wedding once he got the signed papers.
Dean sighed heavily, but before the wondering glances from both Dorothy and Castiel could be turned into questions the doorbell rang announcing Bobby's arrival.
Dot went to answer the door, while Dean prepared her lunch box.
"Morning, everyone..." Bobby came into the kitchen, a small smile on his lips at seeing Castiel at the table. Of course, that was why Dean had asked him to pick up Dotty, but it was still a nice sight.
"Morning, Bobby." Dean handed the older man his daughter's lunch box. "Thanks for doing this. I'm just gonna’ be on call today, if that's okay."
"Of course, like you need to ask, idjit." Bobby nodded as he stood behind Castiel’s chair and stealthily held up his crossed fingers for only Dean to see, then he turned back around sensing Dorothy beside him with her school bag.
"Ready, Uncle Bobby." She announced.
"Right, let's go, Princess. See you guys." Bobby tapped the brim of his omnipresent cap in a farewell salute.
Silence fell over the kitchen as soon as the front door clicked shut. Castiel cleared his throat after a moment, breaking the tension.
“Let me just... “ he started, reaching across the table to pile up the empty plates. He pushed away from the table, picking up the stack of dishes. “I’ll just… put these in the sink.”
“You don’t have to do that, Cas.” Dean took the plates from Castiel. “You’re my guest here.”
“It’s okay, I don’t mind.” Castiel said, but let Dean take the plates and dropped his hands to his side. He bit the corner of his lower lip, sinking back down into the chair he had just vacated. “I don’t know why this is so…” he trailed off, trying to find the right word but falling short.
“It … I wish it wasn’t, I wish it didn’t have to be.” Dean put the plates in the sink and moved back to the table. “Would you like more coffee?”
Cas nodded, offering Dean a small smile. He watched as Dean busied himself with making sure there was enough milk and sugar left at the table before he finally took the seat across from Cas, mugs of fresh, hot coffee steaming on the table before them.
Castiel swallowed hard, staring silently at his mug.
Dean held his mug with both hands. “I’m … “ Dean sighed, not sure how to start.
“Let’s just… get this… over with.” Cas said, eyes darting up to meet Dean’s for a second before landing back on his mug. “Then… we can both just get on with our lives.”
“Yeah, well… see… that’s the thing, Cas. For me to go on with my life,well… I’d love for you to be part of it. Dot wants you to be part of her life, and if this is all the Winchesters can get, then so be it, but it would already mean a lot to have more.”
“Dean, I …” Cas shook his head, eyes wide as he studied Dean’s face, realizing how serious the man was. “Don’t do this, Dean. This was supposed to be simple. Just… sign the papers, and then we can move on with our lives. I can’t… you don’t… Fuck, Dean, it’s been ten years. You don’t know me anymore, I don’t know you anymore.”
“And I deeply regret that. Cas, there’s really no explainable reason why I was stupid enough to walk away, I know that and I don’t ask you to forgive me. All I ask is for you not do to my daughter what I did to you. And I am asking for another chance to at least be your friend,” Dean took a deep breath and waited for Castiel’s verbal slap in the face.
“What do you want from me, Dean?” Castiel whispered after a moment. “I… what is it exactly that you want? I spent years after you left, thinking you just didn’t care, wondering if I could have done something, anything, to get you to stay. And I’ve finally gotten myself to a good place. Balthazar… he loves me, he cares about me, and he helped to fill that giant hole you left inside of me. And I can’t…” Cas paused, taking a deep breath. “I need to know what you want, Dean. Exactly what it is you’re expecting or hoping for. Because I can’t let… I just need to know.”
“I … I cannot tell you what it is exactly that I want, because what I want I cannot dare to hope to get. But what I hope for is for you, to not just walk back into my life now and then simply walk right back out of it.”
“That’s not fair, Dean. And you know it. Dot has only known me for a day, and although she may be confused, we both know she would be just fine with you and Bobby.” Castiel pushed his chair back from the table, fighting the urge to laugh at the absurdity of this entire conversation. “You can’t even begin to realize how badly I used to wanted you to say this to me, Dean.” He whispered, pushing up from the table. “But… I don’t know. Okay? I can’t give you an answer. I just… I need to go, okay? I just need… Fuck, I need to leave.”
“Castiel! I’m not using anyone! I’m not asking you to call off your wedding… Even if I would want you to be mine again, but that’s nothing but wishful thinking on my part.” Dean stood up too. “I am neither asking you to call off your wedding, nor am I asking you to move here and help me raise my daughter. I’m simply asking you to stay in contact.”
“I just… I need to go. I need to think. Can you give me that?” Castiel whispered, feeling himself step back when Dean stepped closer. He could feel his heart beating erratically in his chest, could feel himself seconds away from panicking.
Dean sighed softly and nodded. “Well… You know where to find me now.”
Cas nodded shakily before jerking away and with a clumsy, swift gait moved out of the kitchen and then quickly fled from the house. He told himself that being the one to run this time was only fair... only right. He felt trapped… frightened. Trying to ignore the confusion that settled itself deep in his stomach, he clambered roughly into the car. “Fuck… Fuck!” he shouted in frustration. Again and again he slammed his fists onto his steering wheel trying to regain control, before his shaking fingers fumbled the key into the ignition and he started up the car. He had no idea where he should go or what he was supposed to do now.
Chapter Four