(no subject)
vicodin. risperdal. sugar. caffine.
they all made me insanely hyper lastnight.
i played dress up in my room until nearly dawn,
it was pretty funny though...i laughed at myself a lot.
i've done that more and more these days...laughed at myself that is.
maybe it's a good thing...?
hmmmm.
i've been trying so hard to change for the better the last 2 1/2 months and some people have said the change is apparent. i feel like things are changing. i'm less stressed out and not as tense. unless i'm running late, that really gets to me. ha. seriously though, i hope that i'm doing a better job at life. missing life is sad and i've messed a lot of it already. i hope the people that i hurt are seeing the transformation. that they understand that i'm working at it every single day and that i mean everything that i'm doing.
anyways.
i have to make some more money.
there aren't enough hours in a day for me to work.
hopefully summer will give me some side jobs that pay well.
i'm moving into an apt in july, but it's still in the general area.
the last few days or maybe hours i don't know, i've been thinking it's not a good idea. mostly because i want to make my move a real one and get outta the hudson valley. but realisticly i cannot just jump into that big of a move yet. i don't know what's going on. i am moving, but am i really going to be happy? can i go somewhere else for cheaper? to be happier? ugh. i change my mind too rapidly.
PS-I MISS HANGINGOUT WITH JORDAN.
they all made me insanely hyper lastnight.
i played dress up in my room until nearly dawn,
it was pretty funny though...i laughed at myself a lot.
i've done that more and more these days...laughed at myself that is.
maybe it's a good thing...?
hmmmm.
i've been trying so hard to change for the better the last 2 1/2 months and some people have said the change is apparent. i feel like things are changing. i'm less stressed out and not as tense. unless i'm running late, that really gets to me. ha. seriously though, i hope that i'm doing a better job at life. missing life is sad and i've messed a lot of it already. i hope the people that i hurt are seeing the transformation. that they understand that i'm working at it every single day and that i mean everything that i'm doing.
anyways.
i have to make some more money.
there aren't enough hours in a day for me to work.
hopefully summer will give me some side jobs that pay well.
i'm moving into an apt in july, but it's still in the general area.
the last few days or maybe hours i don't know, i've been thinking it's not a good idea. mostly because i want to make my move a real one and get outta the hudson valley. but realisticly i cannot just jump into that big of a move yet. i don't know what's going on. i am moving, but am i really going to be happy? can i go somewhere else for cheaper? to be happier? ugh. i change my mind too rapidly.
PS-I MISS HANGINGOUT WITH JORDAN.