bring notebooks to borders, tomorrow between 3 and 11

Jun 03, 2005 12:20

lostinlyingeyes: bitch
Sk8terboyrocks: yo
lostinlyingeyes: what r u up to today/tonight
Sk8terboyrocks: sos
Sk8terboyrocks: shit on a shingle
lostinlyingeyes: my family = gone for the weekend
lostinlyingeyes: you = permission to stay tonight
Sk8terboyrocks: sweet
Sk8terboyrocks: a bed ....
Sk8terboyrocks: lol
lostinlyingeyes: definately
Sk8terboyrocks: fuck cant
lostinlyingeyes: y?
Sk8terboyrocks: work at 730 im kent
lostinlyingeyes: read my live journal. fuck that job man. tonight is the night before everything changes, i need you here.
Sk8terboyrocks: i really sorta need the money right now lol
lostinlyingeyes: if u really think its important, ill get you there
lostinlyingeyes: no u DONT
lostinlyingeyes: come tonight and youll believe me by the morning. read my last lj entry before u decide
Sk8terboyrocks: hold on
lostinlyingeyes: and ill still bring u to work (might need a couple bucks tho)
Sk8terboyrocks: im flat broke
Sk8terboyrocks: i dont even have smokes lol
lostinlyingeyes: meh
Sk8terboyrocks: aye
Sk8terboyrocks: lol
lostinlyingeyes: least important thing ever lol
Sk8terboyrocks: what is?
Sk8terboyrocks: i could IOU the asp jar
Sk8terboyrocks: if i need it
lostinlyingeyes: yeah
lostinlyingeyes: since some people would actually write an iou and put it in there rather than just hoping no one ever notices
Sk8terboyrocks: ?
Sk8terboyrocks: i think i have a 40 dollor paycheck i neve picked mine up last week also
Sk8terboyrocks: calling shan brb
Sk8terboyrocks: what a stupid fucking peice of shit whore
lostinlyingeyes: ?
Sk8terboyrocks: both of them
Sk8terboyrocks: moms mad cuz she doesnt see me enuff
Sk8terboyrocks: well fuck let me drop my fucking life for her , not like im just sitting on my ass all day ... UGH
Sk8terboyrocks: UGHHHHHHHH
Sk8terboyrocks: dude my life is shit right now ... it just is
Sk8terboyrocks: im looseing it
Sk8terboyrocks: fuckkkkkk
Sk8terboyrocks: dude?
Sk8terboyrocks: ..
lostinlyingeyes: lol
lostinlyingeyes: sorryu man
lostinlyingeyes: making my dad bring a notebook tomorrow
Sk8terboyrocks: lol
Sk8terboyrocks: yea so my famly hates me now
lostinlyingeyes: that is why you have to be here tonight.
Sk8terboyrocks: im loseing it
lostinlyingeyes: we're right bitch, we are, and well all be together after this
lostinlyingeyes: no matter what else
Sk8terboyrocks: hard to think of when my life is falling apart
lostinlyingeyes: i know it is
lostinlyingeyes: but thats when i realized it. your house burned down. my only home here as well. my car is dying and when it does finally die, i won't be able to get to the one job i've truly succeeded with
lostinlyingeyes: i just needed to know how to make this last forever, and i found it, and somehow, it all started with pam, and the story of taking back sunday, i don't know what will happen for her, but i know where our world is going
lostinlyingeyes: and i know its not gonna take long.
Sk8terboyrocks: how do you know
Sk8terboyrocks: i dont get it i geuss
Sk8terboyrocks: or im just to fucking depressed to
Sk8terboyrocks: i just wanna cry right now
Sk8terboyrocks: but im not even somewhere i can do that even
lostinlyingeyes: come here tonight.
lostinlyingeyes: you can cry. you can laugh. you can heal. i made jesse believe me yesterday, and then we went to the bar and he got drunk and almost got captured by some crazy religious people
Sk8terboyrocks: im stuck listening to freshman
Sk8terboyrocks: the freshman
lostinlyingeyes: and we had to drag him away, yelling at us, and then at the car, me, him, kathy, kevin, and this girl (cant remember her name at the moment) sat there and convinced him he had the friends he didnt believe in
lostinlyingeyes: he cried, he laughed, hes gonna be alright
lostinlyingeyes: we all are
lostinlyingeyes: because we deserve it. did u read it yet?
Sk8terboyrocks: yea
Sk8terboyrocks: i have been listening to the freshman the past 2 days ovr and over
lostinlyingeyes: and that was the song that i hadn't really listened to until her with the line that changed my world
lostinlyingeyes: and i can't feel good while you guys still feel like i felt, especially you bro
lostinlyingeyes: youre coming over tonight if i have to throw you in my trunk.
lostinlyingeyes: no exceptions.
Sk8terboyrocks: but i should go to work
lostinlyingeyes: if you really feel like you still need that shit crap useless fuckin job, ill bring you
lostinlyingeyes: but money is not going to be a problem for long.
Sk8terboyrocks: it's more ethical for me
Sk8terboyrocks: i cant just not show up at work , idkl
lostinlyingeyes: you can call in
Sk8terboyrocks: i dont have there number , i geuss it changed or something
Sk8terboyrocks: idk man
lostinlyingeyes: it did not
lostinlyingeyes: thats bull lol
Sk8terboyrocks: no the number i had in my phone isnt right somehow
Sk8terboyrocks: when i have sed that number before
lostinlyingeyes: its in the phonebook
Sk8terboyrocks: lol ill get it somehow if i gotta
lostinlyingeyes: you're comin here tonight regardless of whether or not my dying car has to drive your ass to kent in the morning and die in the parking lot lol
Sk8terboyrocks: heh righttt
Sk8terboyrocks: i cant stand this tho
Sk8terboyrocks: mom and shan . are acting like it's my fault they dont see me
Sk8terboyrocks: and fuck this isnt easy on me
Sk8terboyrocks: i lost more than both of them
lostinlyingeyes: thats my whole life bitch
lostinlyingeyes: thats new for you
Sk8terboyrocks: i mean give me a fucking break
lostinlyingeyes: my family always pushes me away and then gets offended that they don't see me
Sk8terboyrocks: i cant do it
Sk8terboyrocks: i wont
Sk8terboyrocks: ill cut them off for good , i dont NEED them
Sk8terboyrocks: but theyll sure as fuck miss me when im gone
lostinlyingeyes: it doesnt have to come to that
lostinlyingeyes: if you just believe me.
Sk8terboyrocks: my emotions are like a rollercoaster right now
lostinlyingeyes: you of all people. jesse believes me. sarah (vagina) believes me. Ashley believes me. Stevie believes me.
lostinlyingeyes: its a scary point when it starts happening, you go through all the good and all the bad, but i promise the good prevails
Sk8terboyrocks: maybe it's hard for me cuz i know the most
Sk8terboyrocks: and you the best
lostinlyingeyes: exactly
Sk8terboyrocks: just that these are some of the lowest feelings i have had seince like 13
Sk8terboyrocks: and we all know how had 13 was man , for US
lostinlyingeyes: you gotta fall out of the nest before you believe you can fly bro
lostinlyingeyes: we're not 13, but in a way we always will be. because we are never going to have to comprimise again if everyone believes me and uses it to believe in themselves. to see what I have seen.
Sk8terboyrocks: i just feel so shitty
Sk8terboyrocks: i mean i cant even make the one person that has done more for me and my friends than anyone happy
Sk8terboyrocks: fuck man
lostinlyingeyes: you've got it backwards.
Sk8terboyrocks: how so
lostinlyingeyes: it takes a moment of complete selfishness to find this, not the selfless people we have always been.
lostinlyingeyes: believe me, i had never felt "selfish" before, it was truly a new feeling entirely
Sk8terboyrocks: as would it be for me
lostinlyingeyes: and thinking about the fact that i need you to be here, that can't get you here, just see that if i can get here
lostinlyingeyes: you can to
lostinlyingeyes: because we fucking deserve it.
Sk8terboyrocks: but do i
Sk8terboyrocks: i just have zero confidence left
lostinlyingeyes: if everyone of us was brave enough to believe in ourselves even half as much as we believe in eachother
Sk8terboyrocks: im tired of being who i am
lostinlyingeyes: we will make our world a reality
lostinlyingeyes: thats why i needed to find this now
lostinlyingeyes: we were all about to give up, we had all just about lost what made us think that we were wise and we'd never comprimise.
Sk8terboyrocks: im tired of not even knowing who iam these days
lostinlyingeyes: i found it, and i will spend the rest of my life making sure every last fucking one of you finds it.
lostinlyingeyes: wait until straylight run is playing around the fire pit
Sk8terboyrocks: oh yea?
lostinlyingeyes: oh yeah, for us.
Sk8terboyrocks: the day that happens ill know , without a doubt that life is ok
Sk8terboyrocks: lol
lostinlyingeyes: think about the polar opposites that are the most important music in our life. emo and juggalo
lostinlyingeyes: but we have left the juggalo piece, the piece that says we're us, fuck you, hidden
Sk8terboyrocks: yea
lostinlyingeyes: and lived the emo. let out the juggalo
lostinlyingeyes: the selfish side of the heart, and you will understand
lostinlyingeyes: cuz its all about finding that point
Sk8terboyrocks: i cant let myself be selfish
lostinlyingeyes: where you can be selflessly selfish
lostinlyingeyes: that selfish isnt a bad thing
Sk8terboyrocks: but in my mind any is
lostinlyingeyes: it just means, i'm me, fuck you if you don't like it. i love everyone that gives me the chance and that deserves it, and if you don't want to even bother to look for that in me, fuck you.
Sk8terboyrocks: i need to work shit out with my bad asap
Sk8terboyrocks: i cant get it out of my head now
lostinlyingeyes: definatley
Sk8terboyrocks: and it's starting to tear me apart
lostinlyingeyes: i knew that was gonna be a part of this to
lostinlyingeyes: and pick a week, ill take it off, we'll go.
lostinlyingeyes: simple as that.
Sk8terboyrocks: gotta see how much cash it takes to get up and shit , ill figue it out asap
Sk8terboyrocks: cuz it needs to be fixed
lostinlyingeyes: you figure out the details and give me the date more than 2 weeks in advance
Sk8terboyrocks: he needs to know he fucked up , but that he doesnt have to keep fucking up
Sk8terboyrocks: he can be part of my life
lostinlyingeyes: exactly
lostinlyingeyes: selflessly selfish
Sk8terboyrocks: the insanely awsome life i live
lostinlyingeyes: insanely awesome life you live
lostinlyingeyes: you know i have to post this right?
Sk8terboyrocks: private it
Sk8terboyrocks: ill post it for u , no one else will read this man sorry , not yet
lostinlyingeyes: ok
Sk8terboyrocks: my dads the one this no one can know about , not till im ready to tell them know what i mean
Sk8terboyrocks: actuly fuck it
Sk8terboyrocks: post away *gives thumbs up *
lostinlyingeyes: i love you bro
Sk8terboyrocks: dont they all ?
Sk8terboyrocks: lol
Sk8terboyrocks: j/k
lostinlyingeyes: hell yeah they do
Sk8terboyrocks: and would as many people love me if i wasnt something amazeing
Sk8terboyrocks: i think not
lostinlyingeyes: exactly
lostinlyingeyes: feel it
lostinlyingeyes: and if you made it
lostinlyingeyes: just be glad that you did and stay there
lostinlyingeyes: if you ever feel loved or needed
lostinlyingeyes: remember that you're one of the lucky ones
Sk8terboyrocks: straylight anyone?
Sk8terboyrocks: heh
lostinlyingeyes: and the only part they got wrong is to stop believing in the perfect ending, but just don't rely on it, don't need it
lostinlyingeyes: need to be you. theres no one like us and we are going to change this fucking world i promise you.
Sk8terboyrocks: if not the world some of it .
lostinlyingeyes: only the part that we want.
lostinlyingeyes: this is our world now. just believe in you to believe in us and nothing can stand in our way
lostinlyingeyes: no one has EVER done anything like we are going to do. but EVERYONE who is a good person can learn how, everyone who told us we were wrong
Sk8terboyrocks: yea
lostinlyingeyes: can you wait to say fuck off to rolling stone magazine
Sk8terboyrocks: not 1 bit
lostinlyingeyes: its gonna happen
lostinlyingeyes: this is all really happening
Sk8terboyrocks: lets see
lostinlyingeyes: im gonna have to learn to use lj cut to post this one lol
Sk8terboyrocks: why is that
Sk8terboyrocks: its only like an entire web browser size
Sk8terboyrocks: LOL
lostinlyingeyes: ha you're right though, fuck em. they can get the fuck out my live journal if it bothers them like i said before lol
Sk8terboyrocks: yea
lostinlyingeyes: alright, im gonna go post this, take a shower, and then head to sherman or town?
Sk8terboyrocks: sherman
Sk8terboyrocks: lol
lostinlyingeyes: k peace bro
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