another christmas alone
I am dreading tomorrow, thinking of how I was supposed to spend it with her, thinking of all the broken promises and my shattered heart and soul, thinking of being betrayed by one of my longest standing and closest friends, not just in actions but worse in hiding them and not being honest with me...What the hell, I would never do this to anyone, that is probably why these things happen to me...Trying to be good to everyone ends up hurting you so badly, and trusting people leads the ones you care the most about to let you down. I will be okay, I will carry on, but I will never be the same person. Every word spoken to me now is a potential lie more than a potential truth, and it sucks. I have spent my whole life thinking that there was good in all people, and if you treated them right, they would share that good with you. Maybe I am too idealistic, but it is all I know how to be...I gotta cut this short, goin out for a bit, well, I hope everyone else has a Merry Christmas.