try to patch up every hole as you go
so it's friday. i slept through both my classes. i'm so productive. then went to lunch for like an hour and a half. gosh. and now it's 3:30. i've got to do something. i'll have more to update once i do something with my life.
I was walking down the street with my friend and he said "I hear music." As if there's any other way to take it in. Your not special. That's how I recieve it too. I tried to taste it, but it did not work.
An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You would never see an "Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order" sign, just "Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience."
You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don't want to eat the fish, they just want to make it late for something.
I don't wear a watch because I want my arms to weigh the same. So if somebody asks me what time it is, I have to tell them something that is going on. "What time is it, Mitch?" "Uh, that guy is eating a hamburger." "Crap, I had to be somewhere..."
I bought a doughnut and they gave me a receipt for the doughnut... I don't need a receipt for the doughnut. I give you money and you give me the doughnut, end of transaction. We don't need to bring ink and paper into this. I can't imagine a scenario that I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. To some skeptical friend, Don't even act like I didn't buy a doughnut, I've got the documentation right here... It's in my file at home. ...Under "D".
Someone handed me a picture and said, "This is a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture of you is when you were younger. "...Here's a picture of me when I'm older." Where'd you get that camera man?
I don't own a cell phone or a pager. I just hang around everyone I know, all the time. If someone needs to get ahold of me they just say, "Mitch," and I say, "what" and turn my head slightly...
A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap
When someone hands you a flyer its like they're saying, "here, you throw this away."
I like rice. Rice is great if you are hungry and want 2000 of something.