Half-truths (1/1)
Title: Half-truths
Pairing: Wash/Taylor, Guzman/Mira
Genre: Drama/Angst
Rated: PG
Word Count: 763
Summary: Sequel to ‘Nightcap.’ Two women on opposing forces had more in common than they could ever imagine. Pre-series.
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Wash/Taylor -
She felt incredibly foolish and shame flooded her as she recalled the tears that slipped down her face as she walked out of his office. But at least she had not suffered the indignity of him baring witness to that. Her humiliation was enough as it was.
She had closed off her expression as he had callously informed her that her feelings for him were nothing more than those of a very confused young woman seeking the approval of an authority figure, a man well over a decade her senior. That it would be unprofessional and lacking propriety for them to engage in anything other than friendship.
And as she had listened to him explain the reasons why they could never be she had wished for the ground to open up beneath her feet and swallow her whole, or to disappear into thin air. Wished for something to quell the pain in her chest, to end her heartbreak. Or at least something to numb the unbearable ache that grew with every syllable that fell from his lips.
She hadn’t misinterpreted the signs. She was not some naive, lovestruck girl in the midst of a crush. She knew he felt the same things she felt. There was no mistaking the look in his eyes after they’d escaped from a pack of slashers unhurt, the relief and something else she hadn’t wanted to put into words. There had been no need for words. It would have stolen the beauty of the moment away.
She hadn’t imagined the kiss they had shared afterwards either as they headed back towards the colony. A kiss she could only describe as desperate and yearning. Or the manner in which he’d pressed her to him, the heat radiating off his body, his racing heartbeat and quickening breath as she’d clung to him, welcoming him into her arms.
But they’d never spoken about it afterwards and perhaps that was her mistake. It was as if it had never happened, as if he’d erased it from his memory completely. Their interactions following that day had not changed in the least. And while she knew that they could never allow their personal relationship to interfere in their roles as leaders of Terra Nova, as soldiers, she had thought that perhaps they could skirt the line a bit if only when alone.
When her teasing banter had failed to incite the type of reaction she’d wanted she had assumed it was due to the pressures of the day but as the days passed and he neither mentioned nor engaged with her in any manner other than the usual she knew it wasn’t. She’d tried to convince herself to simply let it go, to discard the episode as an anomaly but she knew it would be nothing more than a farce on her part. In the end things did not work out as she had hoped and she could do nothing else but accept his feelings (or lack thereof) for her.
Perhaps some things were not meant to be.
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Guzman/Mira -
She had not intended for her life to turn out the way it had. Had never in her wildest dreams considered the possibility of ending up an ex-con turned saboteur for hire but that was what she was. Her life summed up in a couple of words. Words that hardly painted her in a flattering light.
Now, however, she could add rebel leader to the list. Her group’s first major skirmish with the soldiers of Terra Nova that morning had cemented the fact and she couldn’t help but wonder what exactly the Chief of Security thought of her at the moment. Probably cursing her name and his bad luck at having ever crossed paths with her. A mirthless chuckle escaped her at the thought.
She was not the type of person that dwelled on the past and as much as she regretted having caused him pain she couldn’t bring herself to regret having met him. Perhaps in another time things would have worked out. Perhaps if she had told him the truth or forced herself to take another course to accomplish her purpose things would have ended differently.
But a voice that sound eerily like Carter’s (and since when did he take up residence in her subconscious?) told her that she was doing herself a disservice by lying to herself. Things had transpired as they would have done so sooner or later and people were unavoidably hurt. There was no stopping that. No making it right.
Perhaps some things were not meant to be.