I know you don't check this as often as you used to, but I would like to say something that goes along with your post.
I hope it wasn't me that made you this upset, there are things I've wanted to say to you, but couldn't find the courage to say them. You're probably going to figure out who I am simply by what I put here, but I don't care. In a way I want to say these things to your face, but am afraid of what the outcome would be. I guess in the end nothing would really change. We don't talk or hang out as much as we used to...which is my fault.
What I have to say next is not meant to be seen as a negative statement. You've always said that you see yourself ending up alone. It saddens me to hear that from you, because I want to be in your life, even if it is as "Just friends". Another part of me is kicking myself for saying that, because I think I have other strong feelings towards you that you do not share with me. I guess in the end these feelings are probably never going to be mutual because of our once close friendship. If I could go back in time and stop myself from becoming so close to you, I probably would, because I don't like feeling like this.
It's not your fault. It's mine. I've always had crushes on people from afar. And when I got really close to you as a friend I wanted it to be something more. But at this point I'm ready to give up. I know that I will never get over you, and in the end will probably never say anything like this in person to you again, because I don't want to hear the response.
I don't want this next statement to "scare" you, but once I thought that my feelings for you were something close to "love". But since I've never been in "love" before, I don't know what the true feeling is. I want to believe that I loved you, but at the same time I don't, because I don't want to hurt myself with the truth.
I don't really know what to say to this to be honest.
I'm sorry that this whole situation exists And no, it wasn't you who made me this upset. I'm not sure who this is, but two people came to mind as I read this. But, there are some good explanations as to why it may not be those people. I don't even know who still knows about this Livejournal thing lol. But it's okay. You left it anonymous for a reason, and I'm going to respect that.
And no, it doesn't scare me. In a way, it's kinda nice knowing someone still cares about me that much.
I don't know if or what's gonna happen from here, but since this is someone I was really that close to, you can talk to me about anything if you need to. Even if it's by message and still anonymous. And if you want my honest opinions, I'll do my best to deliver. lol
I didn't really expect a response, because I know how you are about these types of things. I'm glad that you responded though.
And I am choosing to keep this anonymous because I don't want our friendship, however distant it is, to become more awkward then it already is.
I too am not sure what to say further than what I had before. I guess that I have some questions that I'd like to ask you, but I probably will just keep them to myself because I'm pretty sure if I ask them you won't answer.
I can't promise anything, but I can still try my best. I'd like to think I've grown up a lot since high school, but as a person, I still can't promise anything. I will try my best to answer anything straightforwardly. Even if I don't answer, whatever the questions may be, at least you can say you tried.
In my opinion, you would have to determine what's worth it or not. If there's any chance that you would regret not saying/asking anything, or end up wondering what would have happened, then I would just go for it.
No, you're not bothering me. It's good to get everything out in the open. There's no reason for you to apologize.
I have a pretty good feeling about who this is. But if it's any of the people that this could possibly be, I respect your feelings and the question, but relationship wise, I don't really think anything is going to happen. I'm sorry to say it, because I've been in a similar situation. Maybe not necessarily as strong, or that close of a situation, but in a general sense, similar. I know it sucks, and it might be hard for a while, but I hope everything ends up okay.
Don't blame yourself for anything though. You did nothing wrong. I hope you understand that.
Yeah. Totally we can stay friends. Why wouldn't we be? lol This semester has been pretty crazy busy, but summer should open up more time for me.
But really though, I don't know if you or I are going to end up alone. No one really knows. Sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesn't. I've realized that a little better now. Feeling lonely really sucks, but it's a part of life.
I hope it wasn't me that made you this upset, there are things I've wanted to say to you, but couldn't find the courage to say them. You're probably going to figure out who I am simply by what I put here, but I don't care. In a way I want to say these things to your face, but am afraid of what the outcome would be. I guess in the end nothing would really change. We don't talk or hang out as much as we used to...which is my fault.
What I have to say next is not meant to be seen as a negative statement. You've always said that you see yourself ending up alone. It saddens me to hear that from you, because I want to be in your life, even if it is as "Just friends". Another part of me is kicking myself for saying that, because I think I have other strong feelings towards you that you do not share with me. I guess in the end these feelings are probably never going to be mutual because of our once close friendship. If I could go back in time and stop myself from becoming so close to you, I probably would, because I don't like feeling like this.
It's not your fault. It's mine. I've always had crushes on people from afar. And when I got really close to you as a friend I wanted it to be something more. But at this point I'm ready to give up. I know that I will never get over you, and in the end will probably never say anything like this in person to you again, because I don't want to hear the response.
I don't want this next statement to "scare" you, but once I thought that my feelings for you were something close to "love". But since I've never been in "love" before, I don't know what the true feeling is. I want to believe that I loved you, but at the same time I don't, because I don't want to hurt myself with the truth.
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I'm sorry that this whole situation exists
And no, it wasn't you who made me this upset.
I'm not sure who this is, but two people came to mind as I read this.
But, there are some good explanations as to why it may not be those people.
I don't even know who still knows about this Livejournal thing lol.
But it's okay. You left it anonymous for a reason, and I'm going to respect that.
And no, it doesn't scare me.
In a way, it's kinda nice knowing someone still cares about me that much.
I don't know if or what's gonna happen from here, but since this is someone I was really that close to,
you can talk to me about anything if you need to.
Even if it's by message and still anonymous.
And if you want my honest opinions, I'll do my best to deliver. lol
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And I am choosing to keep this anonymous because I don't want our friendship, however distant it is, to become more awkward then it already is.
I too am not sure what to say further than what I had before. I guess that I have some questions that I'd like to ask you, but I probably will just keep them to myself because I'm pretty sure if I ask them you won't answer.
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I'd like to think I've grown up a lot since high school, but as a person, I still can't promise anything.
I will try my best to answer anything straightforwardly.
Even if I don't answer, whatever the questions may be, at least you can say you tried.
In my opinion, you would have to determine what's worth it or not.
If there's any chance that you would regret not saying/asking anything, or end up wondering what would have happened, then I would just go for it.
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I'm probably going to stop writing here, because I feel like I'm just bothering you.
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It's good to get everything out in the open.
There's no reason for you to apologize.
I have a pretty good feeling about who this is. But if it's any of the people that this could possibly be,
I respect your feelings and the question,
but relationship wise, I don't really think anything is going to happen.
I'm sorry to say it, because I've been in a similar situation. Maybe not necessarily as strong, or that close of a situation, but in a general sense, similar.
I know it sucks, and it might be hard for a while, but I hope everything ends up okay.
Don't blame yourself for anything though.
You did nothing wrong.
I hope you understand that.
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Since you think you're going to end up alone, and I think I'm going to end up alone. Do you think we could both stay friends, so that doesn't happen?
I miss the days when we used to hang out...
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This semester has been pretty crazy busy, but summer should open up more time for me.
But really though, I don't know if you or I are going to end up alone. No one really knows.
Sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesn't. I've realized that a little better now.
Feeling lonely really sucks, but it's a part of life.
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