Guess who's back. Back again.
Let's see. Where to start...
Before the last two weeks or so, everything was going really swell. All fine and dandy.
Lately, I just feel like.... a little like my old self again in the not so good sense. A little bit.
Different conditions and situations of course, but the same basic gist.
It seems like I have trouble being constantly close to people for long periods of time.
I've never really kept a really good friend for more than a couple years. A couple as in like 2 years.
I guess those bonds seem to loosen up easily with me.
It's weird. I've seen a few of those people who are best friends and seem like they're related, because they have so much in common. But when I think about it, I only see a few things that some of my friends have in common with me. Sometimes I feel like I'm so lost in the middle of different categories that the lack of being more extreme towards one side just takes away from it all.
I have no idea if that made sense at all.
And I probably sound really dumb right now, but I don't care.
I've just been feeling a bit down lately.
Work is a bitch.
I was supposed to go job hunting today, but after four hours of sleep, I got jumped on and woken up by Jimi. -_-
I spent like 10 hours with him. I was so sleepy. I was just a bit annoyed, because I didn't know he was going to be dropped off at 8 in the morning and left to me for the whole day. Throwing pillows at the kid for awhile for 4 times gets tiring. Also played Mario Kart for a good while. He beat me at Trouble. Then took him to the Troy Community Center to go swimming and meet up his mom. I left early after he started playing in the pool with his other friends that were there.
Then went to Friday's with Christina and Yousif. Omer was at work til 11, so he couldn't go.
So even though today was supposed to be the first day of the week that I got to sleep in, I guess tomorrow will have to do. It better too lol. But I still work tomorrow night. SUPPOSEDLY for three hours. But it's not gonna happen. I'll either stay there later or go home super early. Then Thursday off :D which hopefully I get to relax and do fun things. Then work all day Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.
After working my butt off at that place, I'm really starting to hate those people who just sit around all day not doing much for like 8-10 bucks an hour. It'd be nice to have one of those jobs yeah, but it'd be nice to know if there's a job out there that really pays what the person deserves.
I'm starting to doubt my wanting a server/waiter job. I've been noticing that I'm not as happy-smiley at work anymore. I still am a little bit, but if people felt obligated to tipping us there, I probably wouldn't get as much. Though, I do think that I would be more of a good waiter if I knew I could possibly get some more dough.
Another thing I've thought of is that people don't really leave much for tip. A few people do, but not a lot. But yeah, I guess it all adds up anyway.
Continuing on about my opening rant, I just feel like I'm so different from friends.
Hannah and I are growing apart. We haven't really had a good conversation in awhile and we don't see each other much.
I just think it's really sad. I'm sorry. I do miss you and our closeness.
Things with Yousif are still pretty good.
But I feel like we really don't have that much in common overall, and sometimes I wonder how we're still this close. Sometimes I also feel like him and Omer would be/are better friends. Plus, there's the whole thing about Yousif wanting to transfer to Oakland.
I also feel like I'm out of the loop on EVERYTHING.
The only thing I do know is that the iphone 4 comes out in 9 days. :D
But I'm gonna still wait like two weeks before trying to get one -_-
Apparently apple's website crashed, because too many people were trying to pre-order one. Today is the first day of being able to pre-order it.
I think a lot of this is being stuck at work for 9 hours 3 days in a row and not being able to do much. I don't wanna call it stress, but maybe it's a mixture of stress, pressures, and exhaustion. And of course, too much thinking. I'm pretty sure that's why I hang out with people all day, play video games, and sleep a lot. To distract myself from thinking too much, and to also procrastinate dealing with the real world... Sometimes I just wish to know who I am.
Blah.
Sorry for being lame. Hopefully the next entry will be a bit more lively.
Before the last two weeks or so, everything was going really swell. All fine and dandy.
Lately, I just feel like.... a little like my old self again in the not so good sense. A little bit.
Different conditions and situations of course, but the same basic gist.
It seems like I have trouble being constantly close to people for long periods of time.
I've never really kept a really good friend for more than a couple years. A couple as in like 2 years.
I guess those bonds seem to loosen up easily with me.
It's weird. I've seen a few of those people who are best friends and seem like they're related, because they have so much in common. But when I think about it, I only see a few things that some of my friends have in common with me. Sometimes I feel like I'm so lost in the middle of different categories that the lack of being more extreme towards one side just takes away from it all.
I have no idea if that made sense at all.
And I probably sound really dumb right now, but I don't care.
I've just been feeling a bit down lately.
Work is a bitch.
I was supposed to go job hunting today, but after four hours of sleep, I got jumped on and woken up by Jimi. -_-
I spent like 10 hours with him. I was so sleepy. I was just a bit annoyed, because I didn't know he was going to be dropped off at 8 in the morning and left to me for the whole day. Throwing pillows at the kid for awhile for 4 times gets tiring. Also played Mario Kart for a good while. He beat me at Trouble. Then took him to the Troy Community Center to go swimming and meet up his mom. I left early after he started playing in the pool with his other friends that were there.
Then went to Friday's with Christina and Yousif. Omer was at work til 11, so he couldn't go.
So even though today was supposed to be the first day of the week that I got to sleep in, I guess tomorrow will have to do. It better too lol. But I still work tomorrow night. SUPPOSEDLY for three hours. But it's not gonna happen. I'll either stay there later or go home super early. Then Thursday off :D which hopefully I get to relax and do fun things. Then work all day Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.
After working my butt off at that place, I'm really starting to hate those people who just sit around all day not doing much for like 8-10 bucks an hour. It'd be nice to have one of those jobs yeah, but it'd be nice to know if there's a job out there that really pays what the person deserves.
I'm starting to doubt my wanting a server/waiter job. I've been noticing that I'm not as happy-smiley at work anymore. I still am a little bit, but if people felt obligated to tipping us there, I probably wouldn't get as much. Though, I do think that I would be more of a good waiter if I knew I could possibly get some more dough.
Another thing I've thought of is that people don't really leave much for tip. A few people do, but not a lot. But yeah, I guess it all adds up anyway.
Continuing on about my opening rant, I just feel like I'm so different from friends.
Hannah and I are growing apart. We haven't really had a good conversation in awhile and we don't see each other much.
I just think it's really sad. I'm sorry. I do miss you and our closeness.
Things with Yousif are still pretty good.
But I feel like we really don't have that much in common overall, and sometimes I wonder how we're still this close. Sometimes I also feel like him and Omer would be/are better friends. Plus, there's the whole thing about Yousif wanting to transfer to Oakland.
I also feel like I'm out of the loop on EVERYTHING.
The only thing I do know is that the iphone 4 comes out in 9 days. :D
But I'm gonna still wait like two weeks before trying to get one -_-
Apparently apple's website crashed, because too many people were trying to pre-order one. Today is the first day of being able to pre-order it.
I think a lot of this is being stuck at work for 9 hours 3 days in a row and not being able to do much. I don't wanna call it stress, but maybe it's a mixture of stress, pressures, and exhaustion. And of course, too much thinking. I'm pretty sure that's why I hang out with people all day, play video games, and sleep a lot. To distract myself from thinking too much, and to also procrastinate dealing with the real world... Sometimes I just wish to know who I am.
Blah.
Sorry for being lame. Hopefully the next entry will be a bit more lively.