First Meme
I snagged this meme off primsong.
When you see this, post a brief snippet of all your fannish works-in-progress.
I'm not normally too bad, save a few long-hand snippets lying around under the bed, but I seem to have a few half-typed at the moment. So, here goes:
"A Cauldron To Boyle Their Heads" (Eight, Charley, 1910 in the West Country - the UK West Country, that is, with ref, to the power of history's myths and the Monmouth Rebellion in particular. It might get stopped for a bit, though).
*
“1910,” she reminded him. “Just the sort of day for a picnic in the West Country, you said.”
He moved on towards the church and she followed, fighting her way through the thick undergrowth and trying to avoid the stinging nettles.
“Hmm,” he mused. “1910, West Country? No, doesn’t ring any bells. Besides, I think this is something older than that.”
She added, “There’s not a chill in the air anyway. It’s boiling. Are you sure you didn’t catch a cold on that dreadful watery planet with the unpronounceable name?”
“Hwiqiama,” he responded automatically. “Don’t be silly, Charley.”
“I’m not the one muttering about dark forebodings on a bright summer’s day. My nurse would have asked what I had for supper the night before.”
He stopped abruptly and she walked into him.
“Doctor!”
He turned. “For that, I’m going back to the TARDIS to fetch something to prove I’m right. You stay here, and don’t get sunburned.”
“Fine,” said Charley. “I shall fetch the picnic hamper and eat all the jam tarts as well while I wait.”
“As long as you leave me some sandwiches and lemonade.”
***
"The Case of the Pink Elephant". Strangely, another Eight, Charley story, but this time for This Time Round, another one set in the Murder Mystery Genre Bubble, so they're taking on roles within the bubble, so they don't know each other yet (look, TTR is what happens Outside Reality, so bear with me...) which is a Michael Innes parody. Possibly. I just have to remember the solution.
*
Dr John Smith [Eight] had suddenly recalled that he was actually Sir John Smith Pearsby of Scotland Yard - it was finding his police badge and papers that did it - and abandoned his assumed persona of bored academic and amateur forger to hasten to the house of Lady Pollard, who was complaining that a pink elephant had been stolen from the stables.
This should have seemed a little unlikely, but somehow it didn’t.
*
“Thank for coming, Inspector,” said Lady Louisa. “It must sound rather odd, but my husband is away and I hardly knew what else to do.”
He nodded. “Perhaps you can enlighten me, Lady Pollard - was this a misleadingly named horse called Pink Elephant or has a large and unusually hued pachyderm actually gone missing?"
[...]
*
Charley turned thoughtful. “Why would someone steal an elephant? I mean, there’s been no ransom note and unless it’s one of those professional cat burglars looking for a challenge -.”
He gave up on doing any of the interrogation himself. “Do you want to join the police force?”
“Oh, no. I’m going to be an explorer,” she returned. “Mind you, it would be a thrill. Can I be your plucky assistant?”
He said, “I’d be delighted, but you’re still a suspect, young lady.”
“Oh, so I am. How funny. What about if you search my room and check there are no elephants there?”
He paused. “You might, having time on your hands, think this sort of thing an amusing practical joke.”
“Well!” She stared at him open-mouthed. “Do you know, I think that might be the rottenest thing anyone’s ever said to me."
***
"Zoe of the Chalet School": A Two, Jamie and Zoe Chalet School crossover, because I've been wanting to do one for 10 years. Jamie gets the obligatory mountain accident, which is just as well, because he really won't fit in a 1930s girls' school...
*
“We can’t just leave him like this, Doctor!” Zoe said.
Jamie propped himself up. “Course ye can. I’ll just wait here and -.” He paled and bit his lip as the movement jolted the injured ankle.
“Faint off, I shouldn’t wonder,” finished Zoe for him, enjoying her moment of unchallenged superiority, despite her concern.
The Doctor hesitated. He had set his heart on those caves for reasons he had not quite explained to either of them. Then he sagged slightly and sat down on a handy rock jtting out by the path. “Yes, well. Jamie, you stay still. Zoe, you go back to that stream we passed a short while ago and fetch some water.”
She nodded quickly. “What are you going to do?”
“I suppose I’d better go and get help.”
*
...
[The teachers discuss their latest problem pupil]
Miss Wilson grinned at them. “As for science, sometimes I’d like to shake her.”
“Nell!”
She laughed at their shocked expressions. “She clearly knows a great deal on the subject. Sometimes she looks guilty, as if she might have let some radical new development slip.”
“Perhaps her guardian is working on a project?” Miss Annersley asked. “He certainly seems to be an expert on every subject under the sun.”
Miss Wilson glanced across. “The thing is, she enjoys the lessons. She forgot herself enough to tell me that these other teachers of hers had never been keen on practical experiments - then she caught up with herself before she let some other secret out.”
“She’s a bigger mystery than Elisaveta,” Miss Annersely agreed. “I can't imagine she'll turn out to be a princess, though.”
Miss Stewart said, “She’s as conceited as Stacie was when she first came, in my opinion.”
The other two shook their heads at her.
“Oh, no,” said Miss Annersley immediately. “It isn’t that sort of thing with Zoe at all. It’s impossible to put one’s finger on, since in so many ways she’s a normal, healthy girl. Did you see her during that snow fight?”
Miss Wilson chuckled. “I rather like her. She is a mystery, but then she hasn’t had a usual upbringing and if you say her guardian is rather eccentric -.”
“Oh, he is, my dear.”
“Well, maybe that’s all that lies behind it. Mind you,” she added, “her geography is erratic, but she’s progressing quickly. At least she can draw a decent map, which is more than Margia can even now.” She drew out the last effort. “Do either of you have any idea where that is supposed to be?"
***
I think the others are on long-hand scraps of paper and I'm not typing them up for a meme. Aside from a couple more Happy Endings, Hasty Exits stories, including one for Liz I've done, but can'rt post yet and one for Nyssa.
Oh, and one for Allo Allo for NYR, which I really must finish pronto. I don't know whether this should be here, so I will keep the snippet a snippet:
"The Ingenuity of Edith Artois (or The Knicked Knockwursts get Nicked Again" (in which Edith and Michelle have to untangle one of those ridiculously complicated messed-up plans they have in wartime Nouvion.)
*
Many people would be struck by the coincidence of running into a tall, handsome, young undertaker when in search of a hearse and three coffins, but Madame Edith took these things in her stride. Others would have even more been struck by the fetching lipstick said undertaker was sporting under his moustache, but these things had ceased to seem unusual in occupied Nouvion.
“What has happened?” demanded the newcomer, melting out of the shadows to pounce on her. “Where is Rene? Where is the grandfather clock?”
She lowered her voice. “That idiot of an Englishman who is masquerading as a policeman has arrested Monsieur Alphonse and confiscated his hearse.”
“I shall sort deal with that,” the other said. “What of the grandfather clock and the dynamite?”
She sighed. “The clock is still in the coffin, but I fear that the dynamite is in the kitchen of the chateau and it is being watched most closely by the Gestapo.”
“This is unfortunate.” The young undertaker frowned. “We must come up with a fiendishly brilliant plan."
***