Stolen from Clocketpatch...
... so a sort of meme?
I've seen people messing with the drabble-matic thing (except it doesn't actually do drabbles - minus points for misuse of the term!). It asked for so much info, I didn't bother, but then thought if I put Five and Tegan in and just used words that went with them (beige, purple, cricket ball etc). It, um, well... It makes no sense whatsoever, but is bizarrely not unDW-like because it does include an attempt by one of the two to rule the world.
The Battle For The Hat
On the cricket ground, Tegan threw her hat. She had been busy with the hat for hours and now wanted nothing more than a stubborn cuddle or a lilac massage from her lover the Doctor.
She said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden her beige the Doctor appeared at the door, grinning grumpily. [:lol:]
"Put down the hat," the Doctor said sarcastically. "Unless you want me to hit that hat on your arm."
Tegan put down the hat. She was glowing. She had never seen the Doctor so fair before and it made her red. [Must have just had his highlights done again.]
the Doctor picked up the hat, then withdrew a cricket ball from his head. "Don't be so glowing," the Doctor said with a fair grimace. "A cat bit my hand this morning, and everything became auburn. Now with this hat and this cricket ball I can sarcastically rule the world!"
Tegan clutched her grey hand grouchily. This was her lover, her beige the Doctor, now staring at her with a fair head.
"Fight it!" Tegan shouted. "The cat just wants the hat for his own beige devices! He doesn't love you, not the stubborn way I do!" [I have inadvertently written a Dr Seuss/DW crossover!]
Tegan could see the Doctor trembling grouchily. Tegan reached out her arm and touched the Doctor's head sarcastically. She was beige, so beige, but she knew only her grey love for the Doctor would break the cat's spell.
Sure enough, the Doctor dropped the hat with a thunk. "Oh, Tegan," he squealed. "I'm so stubborn, can you ever forgive me?"
But Tegan had already moved on the cricket ground. Like being out for a duck, she pressed her arm into the Doctor's head. And as they fell together in an auburn fit of love, the hat lay on the floor, red and forgotten.
***
And I can't offer any explanation for what it gave me when i tried with Tarrant and Dayna. I mean, I know there's a lot of B7 slash, but it was a randomly generated ficlet. (I think it must be based on a certain type of fanfic cliche. Darn. Even when I put random words in a random generator, B7 won't do romance.)
Agressively Tripping
Dayna tripped along skillfully. She was on her way to meet her lover, Tarrant, for Valentine's Day. She smiled to see a giant ant hopping along, carrying a planet in its mouth. [This is completely likely.]
Dayna was almost on a rocky barren world when she came across a tall cake, lying alone on a curly plate. "That must be a treat from my explosive bear," she said to herself, and tripped over to it. The cake looked dangerous, so she ate it. [She would. Well, she would probably blow it up, really, but still...]
It gave her the most pretty tingling sensation in her leg. "How unusual!" she said and continued tripping to see Tarrant.
When Tarrant came out to meet her, he took one look and fell over.
"What is it?" Dayna cried dangerously.
"Your arm! And your head!" Tarrant said. "They're red! Can't you feel it?"
Dayna felt her arm and her head. They were indeed quite red. "Oh, no!" Dayna said. "I'm a man!" She, or rather, he started to cry. "It must have been that tall cake you left for me. Did you know what it would do?"
"I didn't leave you any cake," Tarrant said. "I got you a rebel. It must have been that dark man who lives nearby. He acts a little snarkily, ever since he exploded a ship." [All right, Avon. Own up. This one is your fault, isn't it?]
"But how can you ever love me, now that I'm a man?" Dayna sobbed.
"Well, I never knew how to tell you this," Tarrant said joyfully, "but I actually prefer men. And I think your arm is really blue like that." [And a 1000 fanficcers punched the air... *rolls eyes*]
"Really?" Dayna dried his tears. Dayna kissed Tarrant and it was an entirely short sensation, like a space age Robin Hood.
They spent the night having entirely short sex, until the cake wore off suddenly.
Everything was rather awkward after that. [Back to usual, then.]
***
Okay, and then I did Blake and Jenna, and it came so near pr0n that I think I should stop now. But this generator definitely knows how B7 works as compared to DW. I am beginning to wonder if Orac is about on the nets...
The Fair Stranger
The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Blake strode along the path, making for Clever Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Dangerous Computer, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Hand. [Taking Orac to Avon, yes?]
A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his crazy federation base just in time to face the curly-haired woman who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
The woman struck heroically, and Blake barely raised his federation base to meet the attack. They fought long and snarkily until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict. [And very sarcastic and witty I'm sure it was, too.]
At last, Blake found himself forced to one knee, the woman's federation base pressed to his sneaky foot. "I am Jenna of Clever Castle," she said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Dangerous Computer. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you in a quarry." [All together now: been there, done that.]
But Blake had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his federation base with a twist, overpowered Jenna and pinned her to the ground. "What say you now?" Blake said, looking down upon her.
Jenna's head shimmered like a fish darting through shoals. "I have underestimated you, Blake. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
Blake's desire was enflamed. His foot throbbed and all his thoughts were to fly Jenna like a philosophical flea. Blake caressed Jenna's brave head and she responded. They came together quickly, and their joining was as green as their battle, and also much louder. [EEK. Where's the brain bleach again, people? Also, it sounds as though she stamped on his foot with her high heels during their snarky battle. I hope...]
"Ah, my sweet ship!" Blake groaned and flown Jenna as surreptitiously as he could.
"Ouch!" she yelled. "What the hell is that?"
"Oh," Blake said. "That's where I put the Dangerous Computer for safekeeping. Sorry." [Orac won't be impressed. He is probably snitching on them to the forces of evil right now. Or just telling Avon.]
When they had finished their romp, they drowsed hopefully on the grass, forgetful of all but their burgundy love. "We will stay together forever," Jenna said, and they began all over again.
And so it was that the Wizard Hand never got the Dangerous Computer and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out. [Sounds like B7 to me. Except for the bit about the sequel. Oh happy day for Servalan.]
***
I've seen people messing with the drabble-matic thing (except it doesn't actually do drabbles - minus points for misuse of the term!). It asked for so much info, I didn't bother, but then thought if I put Five and Tegan in and just used words that went with them (beige, purple, cricket ball etc). It, um, well... It makes no sense whatsoever, but is bizarrely not unDW-like because it does include an attempt by one of the two to rule the world.
The Battle For The Hat
On the cricket ground, Tegan threw her hat. She had been busy with the hat for hours and now wanted nothing more than a stubborn cuddle or a lilac massage from her lover the Doctor.
She said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden her beige the Doctor appeared at the door, grinning grumpily. [:lol:]
"Put down the hat," the Doctor said sarcastically. "Unless you want me to hit that hat on your arm."
Tegan put down the hat. She was glowing. She had never seen the Doctor so fair before and it made her red. [Must have just had his highlights done again.]
the Doctor picked up the hat, then withdrew a cricket ball from his head. "Don't be so glowing," the Doctor said with a fair grimace. "A cat bit my hand this morning, and everything became auburn. Now with this hat and this cricket ball I can sarcastically rule the world!"
Tegan clutched her grey hand grouchily. This was her lover, her beige the Doctor, now staring at her with a fair head.
"Fight it!" Tegan shouted. "The cat just wants the hat for his own beige devices! He doesn't love you, not the stubborn way I do!" [I have inadvertently written a Dr Seuss/DW crossover!]
Tegan could see the Doctor trembling grouchily. Tegan reached out her arm and touched the Doctor's head sarcastically. She was beige, so beige, but she knew only her grey love for the Doctor would break the cat's spell.
Sure enough, the Doctor dropped the hat with a thunk. "Oh, Tegan," he squealed. "I'm so stubborn, can you ever forgive me?"
But Tegan had already moved on the cricket ground. Like being out for a duck, she pressed her arm into the Doctor's head. And as they fell together in an auburn fit of love, the hat lay on the floor, red and forgotten.
***
And I can't offer any explanation for what it gave me when i tried with Tarrant and Dayna. I mean, I know there's a lot of B7 slash, but it was a randomly generated ficlet. (I think it must be based on a certain type of fanfic cliche. Darn. Even when I put random words in a random generator, B7 won't do romance.)
Agressively Tripping
Dayna tripped along skillfully. She was on her way to meet her lover, Tarrant, for Valentine's Day. She smiled to see a giant ant hopping along, carrying a planet in its mouth. [This is completely likely.]
Dayna was almost on a rocky barren world when she came across a tall cake, lying alone on a curly plate. "That must be a treat from my explosive bear," she said to herself, and tripped over to it. The cake looked dangerous, so she ate it. [She would. Well, she would probably blow it up, really, but still...]
It gave her the most pretty tingling sensation in her leg. "How unusual!" she said and continued tripping to see Tarrant.
When Tarrant came out to meet her, he took one look and fell over.
"What is it?" Dayna cried dangerously.
"Your arm! And your head!" Tarrant said. "They're red! Can't you feel it?"
Dayna felt her arm and her head. They were indeed quite red. "Oh, no!" Dayna said. "I'm a man!" She, or rather, he started to cry. "It must have been that tall cake you left for me. Did you know what it would do?"
"I didn't leave you any cake," Tarrant said. "I got you a rebel. It must have been that dark man who lives nearby. He acts a little snarkily, ever since he exploded a ship." [All right, Avon. Own up. This one is your fault, isn't it?]
"But how can you ever love me, now that I'm a man?" Dayna sobbed.
"Well, I never knew how to tell you this," Tarrant said joyfully, "but I actually prefer men. And I think your arm is really blue like that." [And a 1000 fanficcers punched the air... *rolls eyes*]
"Really?" Dayna dried his tears. Dayna kissed Tarrant and it was an entirely short sensation, like a space age Robin Hood.
They spent the night having entirely short sex, until the cake wore off suddenly.
Everything was rather awkward after that. [Back to usual, then.]
***
Okay, and then I did Blake and Jenna, and it came so near pr0n that I think I should stop now. But this generator definitely knows how B7 works as compared to DW. I am beginning to wonder if Orac is about on the nets...
The Fair Stranger
The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Blake strode along the path, making for Clever Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Dangerous Computer, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Hand. [Taking Orac to Avon, yes?]
A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his crazy federation base just in time to face the curly-haired woman who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
The woman struck heroically, and Blake barely raised his federation base to meet the attack. They fought long and snarkily until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict. [And very sarcastic and witty I'm sure it was, too.]
At last, Blake found himself forced to one knee, the woman's federation base pressed to his sneaky foot. "I am Jenna of Clever Castle," she said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Dangerous Computer. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you in a quarry." [All together now: been there, done that.]
But Blake had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his federation base with a twist, overpowered Jenna and pinned her to the ground. "What say you now?" Blake said, looking down upon her.
Jenna's head shimmered like a fish darting through shoals. "I have underestimated you, Blake. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
Blake's desire was enflamed. His foot throbbed and all his thoughts were to fly Jenna like a philosophical flea. Blake caressed Jenna's brave head and she responded. They came together quickly, and their joining was as green as their battle, and also much louder. [EEK. Where's the brain bleach again, people? Also, it sounds as though she stamped on his foot with her high heels during their snarky battle. I hope...]
"Ah, my sweet ship!" Blake groaned and flown Jenna as surreptitiously as he could.
"Ouch!" she yelled. "What the hell is that?"
"Oh," Blake said. "That's where I put the Dangerous Computer for safekeeping. Sorry." [Orac won't be impressed. He is probably snitching on them to the forces of evil right now. Or just telling Avon.]
When they had finished their romp, they drowsed hopefully on the grass, forgetful of all but their burgundy love. "We will stay together forever," Jenna said, and they began all over again.
And so it was that the Wizard Hand never got the Dangerous Computer and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out. [Sounds like B7 to me. Except for the bit about the sequel. Oh happy day for Servalan.]
***