(no subject)

Nov 02, 2005 23:09

i think ive reached the breaking point with brody. i cant take him anymore.. i like him so much.. and i just hate having to compete for his attention.. its rediculous.. i think he's worse than nick the more i think about it.. nick at least talked to me and called me.. maybe not all the time but he still made SOME KIND OF FUCKING EFFORT!!!!!!!.. and it hurts like hell when i call him, he doesnt answer,... and doesnt even call back. or he calls back hours later and talks 4 a sec. and i dnt talk to him again til later the next nite.. if you're really into someone.. you dont act like that.. its not that fucking hard.. seriously.. pick up the phone.. dial my number call and say hey how are you baby, k hope your days good we need to hang out sumtime.. bye..... but no.. its jsut the FUCKING hard for him.. i bet he calls at least 2304982039578 other ppl during the day and b/t the 24 hours in a day he cant call me for a second.. i mean damn i sometimes call random ppl w/o even knowing it.. even THAT would satisfy me at this point..

ive just come down to where i cant take it anymore.. im not important to him. and ive cut him soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much slack with shit and i deal with it b/c i want nothing but to be with him.. and its to the point where its really beginning to hurt. all i ask for is to be happy with a guy.. why why why cant i find that.. dont get me wrong i was happy with brody.. he makes me happy just b/c of being with him and how i feel for him.. but the way im treated, my happiness doesnt weigh out with the times where im questioning how he feels or just upset b/c he doesnt even try. he knows what he has to do to make me happy.. and the fact he doesnt do it or try, lets me know he's not really into making me happy all that much.. brody's about brody. yea i get kalli time from him everynow and then , and there has been times where im top on his list.. but thats when we fight. UGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!! shit sucks FUCK HIM. thats the point where im at. I TRY SO HARD FOR HIM.. i call him.. i go see him.. i make plans to see him,.. and i put up with everything.. for nothing.. and it hurtssss more than anything to know that thats just how it is and how it will be. i love brody. as a friend. and b/f. i care about him alot. and all i want is to be with him and be happy. but i dont think itll be that way. he's just NOT THAT INTO ME.. no matter what he says.... he can say all he wants but actions speak louder than words.. and his actions show me exactly how he feels... and it hurts. DAMN it hurts.. girls yall should know how this feels :)... and brody if you happen to read this.. i want to let you know what ur making me feel like.. i FEEL LIKE just a support.. im there when ya need me and you have time available.. when you arent out smoking and doing that shit.. and you feel like you have the time.. tehnnnnn you calll.. i feel like all that i tell you about how i feel goes out one ear and out the other.. i feel like you dont give a fuck at all. basically.. and yea.. your not making me happy.. and im sick of tryin to change you. the fact is clear.. im into you way more than you are to me.. and nothing like it used to be. and idk what to do anymore.. if you really want to be with me like you say.. heres a little advice. FUCKING SHOW IT!!!!!! its just that simple. b/c ask ANY girl.. its not that hard to let us know.. righttt girls? and if it is just THAT hard for ya.. well we'll only have a cppl options... i wna be with you brody.. b/c i feel soooo much for you..and i know if you give it at least a try then we could work and id be happy.. and i cant stand losing you.. i hate even thinking about it.. but its not about just you anymore babe.. for once consider me and my feelings.. and ur actions will speak louder than w/e you say... so say you love me.. say you wana be with me.. im giving you the 30483597389278392759283th chance b/c i want you just that bad.. but ur running out baby..

<333 :( i really just dont know what to do you guys.. i dont want to lose him.. but then again i cant hurt anymore.. i dont even know if i have much left in me to hurt again.. b/c times like this is when i need him most.. but he's not there...and it suckss... pleaseeee i need sumone to talk tooo help me outttt
Previous post Next post
Up