I've Been Told I'm Cynical
I know it's been a really long time since I last updated, but I haven't had a lot to talk about. I've been caught up in solving other people's problems and my own. I still, in my mind, have nothing in particular to talk about, but this might help the person I'm helping out now. So listen...
Why did God make us so fragile? Why did God make us feel emotions, and why didn't He give us the ability to get over our emotions?
There is this girl in my life (not Elizabeth), and she is important to me. I've known her almost her entire life. She's like a little sister to me. There are a couple of funny stories I've had with this girl, and she needs help now. I don't mean to intrude on her life, but she honestly does need help. She has recently been a part of a relationship that meant a lot to this girl. Her and her boyfriend went through a rough patch. They went through a really bad rough patch. They eventually decided to break it off for reasons that I am not going to get into. They decided to go see other people for a while, just to clear up their own relationship. Well, when they split, her ex went out with another girl, and this is where the problem starts. She realized about a week later that she needs him, A LOT. She missed him. However, he had another girl after a week. Well, she wanted him back, and he decided that he was going to come back, but he had to break up with his now girl. Well, he couldn't do it, because he was too afraid of breaking someone's heart (too late). See, when the girl I know and her ex split, he was doing the classic guy thing, and acting like a jerk until she broke up with him. This a thing guys do so we don't have any guilt on our hands, but we ruin lives when we do this. Anyways, he refuses to break it off with his now girl even though he says he is going to do it, and let me tell you, he's not going to do it. He says he will, because he doesn't want to break my friend's heart, but he doesn't realize that all he's doing is further breaking her heart. I know, shallow. What can I say about guys, I am one. Anyways, she's sinking into a hole that only she can escape now, and that's my problem now. I have the tendency to want to help other people out, but if people don't want me to help them, I'm not. You can't recieve advice unless you want to. Now, back to my story. I know a person who was in a depression for a long time (about 3 years or so), and the only way she got out of it was she helped herself. She decided to get out this depression, and when she did, her life was on the way back. Now, this girl in which this entry is dedicated to, I have advice, but you have to want it if you want it to help. If you think this advice I'm about to give is complete crap, turn away, leave, and go live in this rat trap you call a life.
Listen, I know when you break up with someone you've been with for a long time, I know it can be hard for a long time afterward. I know. (This is where the whole cynical thing comes in. I've only had one girlfriend, and a lot of people would blow off all advice I've ever given them as garbage, but trust me, this will be the best advice you've ever recieved from anyone. You have to trust my wisdom. Show some blind faith here). However, you have to get over it. You can't live in the past, and all things happen for a reason, and that reason is to better you. I know it doesn't seem like that, but it always is. And when bad stuff happens, you have to fight through it. You can't let it beat you down, you have to fight. This is God, the almighty God, putting you through a test of extreme here. You have to find a way out of it, but still come out alive. That's the catch, the whole living part. Taking your life is the easy solution, and it seems most rational, but that crap is so irrational, it hurts to even think about it. When you take your life, it's the world's fault, and it's not anyone's fault, it's YOUR fault. The world or whoever didn't slit your wrist, or give you enough pain killers to kill ten elephants. YOU DID IT! There is nothing else to it. YOU KILLED YOURSELF WHEN YOU COMMIT SUICIDE, and guess what, I won't be caring. I will show no pity on your soul that was here, and is now in hell. Let me tell you, I don't sympathize with you. Sympathy is when someone has gone through what you've been through. I empathize with you. I don't know what you're going through exactly, and I doubt I ever will. I've gotten past that stage, and you need to. The only thing I can do is give you the advice I have gotten and have learned over my years on this Earth, and they're more than your years here. I know you hate when people give you advice on your problems, and when they say "I know exactly what you're going through." People are just trying to help. It's human nature. So, don't bite their heads off. BE PATIENT!
First, get over this stupid, idiotic, self-centered pussy of a boy. If he can't fess up to you, and he can't completely break it off like it needs to be, then he's no better than pond scum. Realize this. When you realize this, you're on your way back. I promise. Get past this guy. You have to. You're living in past (which you can't do), and that's what's killing. Not this stupid boy. Get over him. NOW! Second off, we're all alone at one point in time in our lives. It happens. We're alone with no one to talk to. It's scary, yes I know, but it's a test. If you can make it alone, you can make it anywhere. You're going to have to in order to survive college, much less normal life. Now, you have to, HAVE TO, find happiness within yourself. If you are going to get someone, much less make them happy, you have to be happy within your own confinement. This is, because if you aren't happy with yourself, the person you are with is not going to be happy because you aren't happy. It's a weird and vicious cycle. Trust me. Third, don't do anything stupid. Be the good, innocent little girl I still remember. I know you know this girl, and if you stray away from her, I'm not going to be here for you. I don't stay with people who aren't healthy for themselves, much less me. Now, do this. Listen to those who are willing help. Listen to Elizabeth. She knows what it's like. Listen to her. It helps. I don't know what you're going to do, but in my mind, you have two options. You can continue to dig your a hole that only you can get out of, because no one is going to be there to help you out. OR, you can stop digging and you can get out of the hole before it becomes so deep, that you won't ever get out of it. Make up your mind. Whatever that decision is, it's yours, and not mine. One way leads to a hell that you don't want to experience, and the other way leads to, I don't know. But I can tell you, it's a lot better off than the direction you are going now. Also, I hate smokers. I definitely don't hang out with smokers. And if you continue to do this, I WILL beat some sense into your head with a book. That's a promise.
Thanks one and all. I'll be talking tomorrow, and what not, but for now, I love you Elizabeth. I'll be seeing you in 3 days. I love you.
Why did God make us so fragile? Why did God make us feel emotions, and why didn't He give us the ability to get over our emotions?
There is this girl in my life (not Elizabeth), and she is important to me. I've known her almost her entire life. She's like a little sister to me. There are a couple of funny stories I've had with this girl, and she needs help now. I don't mean to intrude on her life, but she honestly does need help. She has recently been a part of a relationship that meant a lot to this girl. Her and her boyfriend went through a rough patch. They went through a really bad rough patch. They eventually decided to break it off for reasons that I am not going to get into. They decided to go see other people for a while, just to clear up their own relationship. Well, when they split, her ex went out with another girl, and this is where the problem starts. She realized about a week later that she needs him, A LOT. She missed him. However, he had another girl after a week. Well, she wanted him back, and he decided that he was going to come back, but he had to break up with his now girl. Well, he couldn't do it, because he was too afraid of breaking someone's heart (too late). See, when the girl I know and her ex split, he was doing the classic guy thing, and acting like a jerk until she broke up with him. This a thing guys do so we don't have any guilt on our hands, but we ruin lives when we do this. Anyways, he refuses to break it off with his now girl even though he says he is going to do it, and let me tell you, he's not going to do it. He says he will, because he doesn't want to break my friend's heart, but he doesn't realize that all he's doing is further breaking her heart. I know, shallow. What can I say about guys, I am one. Anyways, she's sinking into a hole that only she can escape now, and that's my problem now. I have the tendency to want to help other people out, but if people don't want me to help them, I'm not. You can't recieve advice unless you want to. Now, back to my story. I know a person who was in a depression for a long time (about 3 years or so), and the only way she got out of it was she helped herself. She decided to get out this depression, and when she did, her life was on the way back. Now, this girl in which this entry is dedicated to, I have advice, but you have to want it if you want it to help. If you think this advice I'm about to give is complete crap, turn away, leave, and go live in this rat trap you call a life.
Listen, I know when you break up with someone you've been with for a long time, I know it can be hard for a long time afterward. I know. (This is where the whole cynical thing comes in. I've only had one girlfriend, and a lot of people would blow off all advice I've ever given them as garbage, but trust me, this will be the best advice you've ever recieved from anyone. You have to trust my wisdom. Show some blind faith here). However, you have to get over it. You can't live in the past, and all things happen for a reason, and that reason is to better you. I know it doesn't seem like that, but it always is. And when bad stuff happens, you have to fight through it. You can't let it beat you down, you have to fight. This is God, the almighty God, putting you through a test of extreme here. You have to find a way out of it, but still come out alive. That's the catch, the whole living part. Taking your life is the easy solution, and it seems most rational, but that crap is so irrational, it hurts to even think about it. When you take your life, it's the world's fault, and it's not anyone's fault, it's YOUR fault. The world or whoever didn't slit your wrist, or give you enough pain killers to kill ten elephants. YOU DID IT! There is nothing else to it. YOU KILLED YOURSELF WHEN YOU COMMIT SUICIDE, and guess what, I won't be caring. I will show no pity on your soul that was here, and is now in hell. Let me tell you, I don't sympathize with you. Sympathy is when someone has gone through what you've been through. I empathize with you. I don't know what you're going through exactly, and I doubt I ever will. I've gotten past that stage, and you need to. The only thing I can do is give you the advice I have gotten and have learned over my years on this Earth, and they're more than your years here. I know you hate when people give you advice on your problems, and when they say "I know exactly what you're going through." People are just trying to help. It's human nature. So, don't bite their heads off. BE PATIENT!
First, get over this stupid, idiotic, self-centered pussy of a boy. If he can't fess up to you, and he can't completely break it off like it needs to be, then he's no better than pond scum. Realize this. When you realize this, you're on your way back. I promise. Get past this guy. You have to. You're living in past (which you can't do), and that's what's killing. Not this stupid boy. Get over him. NOW! Second off, we're all alone at one point in time in our lives. It happens. We're alone with no one to talk to. It's scary, yes I know, but it's a test. If you can make it alone, you can make it anywhere. You're going to have to in order to survive college, much less normal life. Now, you have to, HAVE TO, find happiness within yourself. If you are going to get someone, much less make them happy, you have to be happy within your own confinement. This is, because if you aren't happy with yourself, the person you are with is not going to be happy because you aren't happy. It's a weird and vicious cycle. Trust me. Third, don't do anything stupid. Be the good, innocent little girl I still remember. I know you know this girl, and if you stray away from her, I'm not going to be here for you. I don't stay with people who aren't healthy for themselves, much less me. Now, do this. Listen to those who are willing help. Listen to Elizabeth. She knows what it's like. Listen to her. It helps. I don't know what you're going to do, but in my mind, you have two options. You can continue to dig your a hole that only you can get out of, because no one is going to be there to help you out. OR, you can stop digging and you can get out of the hole before it becomes so deep, that you won't ever get out of it. Make up your mind. Whatever that decision is, it's yours, and not mine. One way leads to a hell that you don't want to experience, and the other way leads to, I don't know. But I can tell you, it's a lot better off than the direction you are going now. Also, I hate smokers. I definitely don't hang out with smokers. And if you continue to do this, I WILL beat some sense into your head with a book. That's a promise.
Thanks one and all. I'll be talking tomorrow, and what not, but for now, I love you Elizabeth. I'll be seeing you in 3 days. I love you.