[T&B]
sing a happy tune, the boy who cries through you
Yuri -> Kotetsu
Briefly R
Notes: This takes place after the series, when Wild Tiger is back in the game. The pronouns and formatting are deliberately chosen. There's also a FFST at the end. This ... is my first (and probably only) T&B fic. P-please b-be g-gentle. "OTL
I. relive the pictures that have come to pass
Once upon a time, his father takes him to the new planetarium down the street. Yuri clutches his father's hand when the night sky suddenly looms high over their heads, and a thick strip of stars streams to the west. His round eyes like luminous eggshells must have had attracted one of the attendants, for the worker assures the boy that the roadway of stars represents a hand of the Milky Way -- but, but Yuri shivers, and knows better.
"Look over there," his father suddenly exclaims with a voice that bounces across and echoes wide. They pause, briefly embarrassed, but Yuri laughs lightly and peeks. "Look," his father continues in a more hushed tone. "That's our sun. No, to your right. That bright thing--that's our sun."
"But it's so small."
And so, when they take their seats and wait for the presentation to begin, the boy keeps his eyes trained on the sun, the tiny brilliance floating in the vast sea of space. The planetarium rumbles as the equipment starts, and the night sky flickers once, twice, pitch black. Yuri leans back and stares at the green afterimage of the tiny sun against his eyes.
Isn't it lonely?
II. remember people change
send a heartbeat to
the void that cries through you
III. micro ecstatic auto erratic
There's a rick rack tick-it-ty tap these nights, as hail splatters across the roof tops and against the sleek bodies of Tiger and Bunny. Lunatic cuts through the steel grey skies as sleek as a dropping star, and when Bunny lunges, he arches back through rumbling clouds and towards the streets. Tiger leaps up from below, but Lunatic reaches out, grabs the idiot's headpiece, and uses the Hero's weight to propel himself towards a rooftop. And so they dance, the same waltz night after night after Lunatic roasts another well-deserved murderer (or victim, as some prefer to mitigate)--the same rhythm and rhyme, time after time.
"You're really pissing me off," Tiger growls as soon as Lunatic catches his breath, but time runs out and the Hero grabs at thin air. The vigilante likes to believe that Bunny's ears have perked, for as soon as Tiger falls to the streets like a deadweight, Bunny descends fast enough to turn gravity green. Hail fills the absence, that rush of tappity tap tap tap tap tap
tap
A flick of a coat and he disappears.
IV. we can watch the world devour in its pain
tap
the corridor stretches on
The grandfather clock taps lightly, gleefully, for it's almost to the hour. The boy opens the door of his bedroom and peaks out into the foggy darkness. Far above, the clouds rush against the night sky and stream down the endless corridor. Facing the impossible hallway that leads to the end of the world, the boy steps out of his room, steps quietly, lightly, hush dear, don't let him hear.
don't let Papa hear you
Identical, closed doors line the path. The boy slips out of his room and, one ragged breath at a time, presses his ears against the walls. He listens, but only the grandfather clock taps, tap tap tap
tap
It's one.
Yuri gasps awake.
V.
do you know how stars are born?
there's this cloud of light
a hazy nursery of fireworks and anticipation
crack crack
pop
one day
the fireworks dim and the
cloud contracts
light gathers in the center and then
shines
a new star
Do you know how stars die?
VI. I can't remember if everything's the same
On the morning after Christmas, smoke and sirens greet Yuri’s nonplussed face when he returns home. Before the police can pull him back, his body has hurled itself against the flames licking the front door. With panic biting against his heels, the man struggles up the stairs and into the hidden closet where he has kept the spare costumes and masks. Time blurs, blurs and smudges like damp charcoal, because before he can blink, his hands stuff a mask and cape into a black bag, Blue Rose tears off his ceiling, and the world freezes over.
He blinks.
"Are you okay?" the Hero shouts as she leaps down to his side. "Here, grab my arm."
I'm more than capable of escaping by myself, but Yuri bites down on those incriminating words. Instead, he chokes out, "My mother?"
"Sky High has carried her to safety, but she's inhaled a lot of smoke."
Yuri attempts to gauge his feelings, but the urgent need to take a breath of fresh air complicates any mental processes. He allows Blue Rose to slip a rather short arm under his shoulders, and pretends to require assistance when descending the icy stairs.
His mother will not look him in the face.
It's probably better this way, anyway. Some young paramedic hovers over his shoulder as Yuri checks his own pulse, examines his own (minor) cuts and scrapes with a small hand mirror, and uses a shock blanket to wipe soot off his forehead. His mother will not look him in the face, fine, that's fine, everything's fine, she looks fine really, he's fine as well, and that's why she's going to the hospital. Putting on his haughtiest face, Yuri orders the bewildered paramedics to ship his mother to the hospital immediately.
"... don't you want to ride with her?" one of the paramedics asks faintly.
Yuri just sighs.
VII. shouldn't me like a stranger, like you want to believe
There's a drumming in his once upon a time heart, an elastic ripple of a hydrostatic ghost. Yuri moves down the corridor and opens the first door. As the room lashes out and engulfs him whole, a narrow bed plows out and flips him supine. Moonlight filters through the blinds and spirals across the dusky air like cobwebs, and pale blue slits shine against Yuri's eggshell whites. A bulky silhouette moves across the wall, past the dolls, past the frills, past the mirrors that glaze over like frost, and puts a finger against his cruel lips. Yuri’s fingers clutch against the bed frame. As the bulky silhouette blocks the moon, and that cruel, mocking face grows darker against the white halo tracing around Legend's skull.
There's a drumming in his once upon a time heart, and it expands across the room. Time rewinds; the bed grows or his limbs shrink, but Yuri never knows. His eggshell whites grow wider and wider, but the hydrostatic ghost covering his once upon a time heart remains shocked still. Legend smiles, and slides a finger down the blinds. Clack clack clack, and the moonlight halo splinters. Clack clack clack. Shadows dance against the wall, against Yuri's skin like skeletons, and in the nest of lunacy, Yuri suddenly feels sober, too sober, too sober.
He's too sober.
Legend turns and moonlight sparks in his hand.
Legend turns and moonlight sparks in his hand.
Legend turns and moonlight sparks in his hand.
Yuri shouts.
"You were shouting again."
He wakes. The thin blur between the impossible and the probable melts, and in the darkness, he spots a ruffled lump of hair leaning against the foot of the bed. Right. Yuri rolls over, and eyes the digital clock--the clock sporting Barnaby's stupid grinning face. Kaede's room. He's in Kaburagi Kaede's room. His feet reach past the mattress and with little effort, he can kick Kotetsu's head. Ah. Even with only a hint of moonlight spinning through the room, Yuri lifts the blanket over his face.
"Kaede used to have nightmares too, you know," Kotetsu continues.
"I'm fine," Yuri murmurs against the blanket. "You can go back to sleep."
"What was it about?"
"I don't remember."
But Kotetsu proves relentless. "Ah. Hmm. You know, it really helps to talk it over. Since you got here ..."
"I got here two days ago."
"Yeah, well. Then that's two nights, right? Do you have kids?"
Yuri pauses. He peeks over the blankets with absolute disbelief, but no one laughs. "I am ... No ..."
"Oh. Oh right. Sorry. With your being a judge and all--"
"I'm okay. It's okay."
A sigh rushes out from the foot of the bed. Kotetsu stands up and brushes out his pajama pants. He then pats Yuri on the feet, which causes the latter to jump. "Well, um. Uh, good night, then."
Once the door shuts behind Kotetsu's back, Yuri buries his face into the pillow. Legend's silhouette against the splintering moonlight seems a lifetime ago. For crissakes, who pats strangers on the feet?!
VIII. let’s stay together, to see what we become
He shouldn't agree. When Yuri sends off the last of the ambulances and whirls around to catch goddamn Kotetsu standing among the people crowding in front of his now icicle of a house, his stomach sinks. Kotetsu knows him, of course, knows him from work, knows him to be a sort of friend, or at least, a potential friend ... Kotetsu knows him.
And now, Kotetsu has extended his hand.
"I can just book a hotel room," Yuri protests (weak, weak, weak, weak).
"It's the holidays, Judge Petrov," Kotetsu protests back (tempting, tempting, tempting, tempting).
"But I'll be--"
"Kaede went back home this morning. Actually, I just got back from sending her off. Man, kids these days. They want to be everywhere, all at the same time. She says that I never see her, but then I invited her to spend this entire week with me, and she goes running off right after Christmas! I can't ... sorry." A sheepish grin spreads across Kotetsu's ridiculously amiable face as Yuri stares deadpan at that very special cat beard. "Look, all I'm saying is that you and your mom shouldn't have to spend the holidays in the hospital. Or in a hotel."
"My mom needs to stay in the hospital."
"Oh, we can go see her in the hospital then."
We? We?! As the brazen pronoun screeches through Yuri's head, he says, "Mr. Kaburagi, this is really too much. I--"
"Hey. Look. I don't want to spend the holidays alone either."
And so, Yuri shuts his mouth.
IX. all that you mask, the more you reveal
Eight murderers escape before Lunatic's awakening. Judge Petrov calmly faces the first prisoner, a man who tortured and raped his neighbor's daughter. He bites down on his tongue as the defense slaughters the prosecution and rips through the evidence like how the killer ripped through his victim. The judge slams down the gavel, but the prosecution bends over in defeat. Two weeks later, Judge Petrov faces his next killer, who has been personally delivered by Sky High. Eggshell whites peer into those wide, taunting eyes of the wife beater, and Legend's ghost laughs through the murderer's pupils. A shudder ripples through the judge's body, but he once more bites down on his tongue.
You must not sit still.
Five murderers later, Judge Petrov simply chews his bottom lip in court. His role is to slam the gavel, to read from the paper, for his power lies just beyond the peripheries of justice. Eggshell whites shine brightly in court, promising judgment promising revenge promising the flames of hell, the end of the impossible corridor, but the killers call the judge’s bluff.
On the night before the eighth murderer, the judge rewatches the tape of the killer's capture. Just as Wild Tiger is about to pounce on the suspect, Judge Petrov pauses the screen and his once upon a time heart skips a beat. It's the first one. It's the first killer. The judge sinks into his face into his palms, and unleashes an uneven breath.
You must not sit still.
You must not let evil loose.
You must not
But he does. As the gavel slams down, a slow smirk slides across the killer’s face. The weak yellow hands of the system grab those blood drenched fists, but cannot keep the promises from dripping off that sick stained smirk, promises of later, promises of more, promises of again, again, and again ... The scent of the killer lingers in the court room, and Judge Petrov’s once upon a time heart swells. Another door opens down the corridor.
And so, when Lunatic's arrow rips through its first target, relief cracks through the air as fiercely as the hydrostatic skeleton dancing over the vigilante's fingers. In the smoky aftermath, with the piercing sirens arriving one step too late too late, Lunatic basks in satisfaction and the blissful tranquility of termination.
X. the lunatics have taken over the asylum
caught up in circles
tangled and blue
all that you find
all that you lose
all that you give
all you receive
and all that you take
all that you leave
XI. when the madman flips the switch
Sometimes, Yuri tries the door far down the corridor, where the air drops to a bone clattering chill. A velvet darkness embraces his shivering shoulders, and when the door closes behind his back, and that man reaches out.
He's so warm, he's so warm, and his breath smells like spice.
"Kotetsu, I--" Yuri begins urgently, but the man's urgency comes first and those broad shoulders push him against the door. Yesterday's stubble slides against his jaw and fine hot mist outlines the peripheries of his scar to leave want and more in its wake. Yuri's hands reach behind the man's neck, softly, slowly, at first, but then the older man grabs his waist, and traces circles, circles down the low dip of his back and over his thighs.
A whimper escapes Yuri's lips and he attempts, "Kotetsu, I have to tell you--" but the man cares not for words. He pushes him down, down against the velvet darkness which suddenly grows too warm, so Yuri sheds his oxford that clings like a second skin. His lips brush up Yuri's arms, and then that wet tongue licks up his shoulders and across the nape of his neck. Yuri swallows, but the man has already undone his belt.
"Kotetsu, look, I am--" Yuri gasps out, and nearly loses his resolution when the older man pulls Yuri's hips onto his lap and grinds their stiff cocks together. Those words melt into a moan, and Yuri bites against Kotetsu's shoulder as the man forces his hips to grind faster and faster, harder and hard--
"Kotetsu!" Yuri suddenly shouts, and forces their bodies apart. "I ... " he begins, rather lamely. "I am..."
"I know."
"What?"
But there are better things than conversation, as the man seems to desperately want to prove, over and over again. One hand strips Yuri's pants off before the younger man can recover from his shock, and just before Yuri is bent over, those eggshell whites catch the hunger gleaming off of those burning eyes. The tiger has found his prey, and licks his lips. Yuri bites down on the velvet darkness when the man thrusts, and screams.
XII. if you need to crash and burn
Yuri imagines that he has made some terrible life decisions before, but he currently cannot think of any worse than having agreed to temporarily stay with Kaburagi Kotetsu. The latter, after having repeatedly apologized for the small bed, has set him up in his daughter's room. It is only then, when Kotetsu, whistling cheerfully, leaves in search for a spare bathrobe, does reality finally slap Yuri across the face.
Wild Tiger.
He is living with Wild Tiger.
He is living with Wild Tiger; he is not living alone.
He, with a telltale blazing loud scar covered by makeup, is living with Wild Tiger.
Under Barnaby's bright plastic glare from the wall, Yuri rubs his temples. Well, at least he has eliminated all evidence of vigilante activities from the scorched house, and has managed to not only save his costume, but also a spare bottle of foundation. He glances the oversized mirror gracing the opposing wall. Perhaps it is a good thing that Kotetsu has set him up in an adolescent girl's room.
That night, Kotetsu cooks up some fried rice and sets out two plates. Yuri later glances into the refrigerator, and predicts that they will have fried rice again with shrimp instead of chicken. And perhaps, on the night after that-- Yuri bites down on his bottom lip. No. The night after that, he should leave. He should have left. He should be gone.
He should be a lot of things. Yuri stares at the shrimp in the fridge as his brain fires excuse after excuse.
Normality, however, sets in fast. When Yuri stays overtime the next day, his phone rings and his brain does not even question reality when Kotetsu calls out a greeting.
"I'm staying late today for work," Yuri explains politely. "Please eat without me."
"Oh come on, it's the holidays."
"Actually, today's a work day."
"No, it's the holidays," Kotetsu's voice insists. "Do you even get overtime pay? Look. It's almost New Years. Come home."
Come home.
They have fried rice again.
Yuri picks at his shrimp as Kotetsu replays the Christmas greetings left on his voice mail. The lawyer averts his gaze to a crack on the back wall when an effervescent smile floods Kotetsu's face.
beep
"Ah, Kotetsu-san, it's not like ... I wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas or anything ... Merry Christmas ... See you tomorrow."
beep
"Merry Christmas, Kotetsu-san! .... and Merry Christmas again!"
beep
"MMMMM Kotetsu honey, where are you tonight? Are you with the little darling, ooooh, tell her that Auntie Nathan wishes you both a Merry Christmas all right? Mmm just between you and me, I think that I'm getting--"
beep
"KOTETSU, HELP ME NATHAN HAS A HAND ON MY--"
beep
"Kotetsu, I hope you and your daughter are enjoying your holidays. Thank you for asking earlier, but I will be spending this holiday abroad as, you know, we don't get many vacation days. I wish you a Merry Christmas, and I look forward to seeing you in a few days. Perhaps we can enjoy New Years together. Again, Merry Christmas!"
beep
"Ah, Barnaby is always so formal," Kotetsu pouts at the answering machine. "But hey, maybe he'll be back for New Years. Hey, Yuri, what do you think of that?"
"Hmmm?" Yuri asks as he keeps those eggshell whites carefully trained on the wall cracks.
"What do you think about spending New Years together with Barnaby?"
Yuri clamps down on the sudden urge to throw his plate, but manages to lie.
XIII. sing a happy tune, the boy who cries through you
Let me tell you about this anger.
Let me tell you about this anger which has burned inside, burned inside for so long that I've emptied my heart out. I am a dead star, Kotetsu, because there's this cold hard pit, there's this cold hard pit of when all of my yesterdays compressed furiously into a black black grave.
Let me tell you about this anger, this anger which words cannot explain and tears cannot shed. Its fingers wrap around my neck, and sometimes they squeeze so tight that I cannot release. Most times (I know), I hide it well. I hide it well, and you don't know because I've shoved everything behind the locked doors leading down to the graves where stars flicker and die.
Let me tell you about this anger, its emptiness and my attempts. With every kill, with every scumbag I wipe off the streets, I check inside. I pause, pause, take a moment, is it there, is there something, is it filled, am I whole, am I whole, am I whole
am I whole
am I still angry
am I still burning
let me tell you
let me tell you
please understand
I am burning out
XIV. give me life, give me life
On the night before New Year’s Eve, Yuri packs up his things and stuffs his opaque bag into a larger disguise. He's found a new apartment, a new place where he can set up camp, but before he can even maneuver out of Kaede's room to announce the news, Kotetsu bursts in and presents two tickets to the planetarium.
"I actually won them at work," Kotetsu explains sheepishly, and Yuri's resolution collapses like a house of cards.
But this time, the brilliant blanket sweeping across the night sky does not spark his once upon a time heart. He, with hands folded across his lap, sits quietly as the stars rotate with the speaker's voice across the dome. Beside him, Kotetsu releases "ooohs" and "ahhhs" with so much enthusiasm that the young girl behind them begins to fuss. Yuri tosses a glare over his shoulder, and under the soft glow of the spiraling planets, his eggshell whites swiftly shut the situation down.
When the speaker ends the show, Yuri gathers his jacket and begins to stand. Under the dim starlight, Kotetsu grabs his arm.
"No, wait."
The lawyer steadies his breath. "What?"
"I want to stay here just a while longer."
"We have to go."
"Not until they kick us out," Kotetsu protests with an extra dose of puppy eyes.
Defeated, Yuri leans back against the chair.
And so, they sit there, staring at the makeshift night sky as the Milky Way shimmers and drifts across the heavens. A sun floats past every so often, and Yuri's eggshell whites follow its blazing path with a measure of lost innocence. The planetarium soon shuts off its music, but Kotetsu's low voice softens the deafening claustrophobia by counting the impossible stars.
Dreams touch across Yuri’s forehead. Somewhere beyond the velvet darkness, beyond where Kotetsu's voice drifts in and out, he slides down the endless corridor and reaches for another door. Just as he is about to turn the knob, Kotetsu's voice breaks in and asks, "Yuri?"
"Hmmm?"
"Thank you."
Those eggshell whites fly open and Yuri swallows his stammer. "Why?"
"For keeping an old man company." Kotetsu smiles, and continues to count.
fin
FFST
01. Collide - The lunatics have taken over the asylum
02. Smashing Pumpkins - The beginning is the end is the beginning
03. Collide - Like you want to believe
04. Daniel Powter - Give me life
05. Triple H - Haiiro no suiyoubi (cover)
06. Savage Garden - Crash and burn
Yuri -> Kotetsu
Briefly R
Notes: This takes place after the series, when Wild Tiger is back in the game. The pronouns and formatting are deliberately chosen. There's also a FFST at the end. This ... is my first (and probably only) T&B fic. P-please b-be g-gentle. "OTL
I. relive the pictures that have come to pass
Once upon a time, his father takes him to the new planetarium down the street. Yuri clutches his father's hand when the night sky suddenly looms high over their heads, and a thick strip of stars streams to the west. His round eyes like luminous eggshells must have had attracted one of the attendants, for the worker assures the boy that the roadway of stars represents a hand of the Milky Way -- but, but Yuri shivers, and knows better.
"Look over there," his father suddenly exclaims with a voice that bounces across and echoes wide. They pause, briefly embarrassed, but Yuri laughs lightly and peeks. "Look," his father continues in a more hushed tone. "That's our sun. No, to your right. That bright thing--that's our sun."
"But it's so small."
And so, when they take their seats and wait for the presentation to begin, the boy keeps his eyes trained on the sun, the tiny brilliance floating in the vast sea of space. The planetarium rumbles as the equipment starts, and the night sky flickers once, twice, pitch black. Yuri leans back and stares at the green afterimage of the tiny sun against his eyes.
Isn't it lonely?
II. remember people change
send a heartbeat to
the void that cries through you
III. micro ecstatic auto erratic
There's a rick rack tick-it-ty tap these nights, as hail splatters across the roof tops and against the sleek bodies of Tiger and Bunny. Lunatic cuts through the steel grey skies as sleek as a dropping star, and when Bunny lunges, he arches back through rumbling clouds and towards the streets. Tiger leaps up from below, but Lunatic reaches out, grabs the idiot's headpiece, and uses the Hero's weight to propel himself towards a rooftop. And so they dance, the same waltz night after night after Lunatic roasts another well-deserved murderer (or victim, as some prefer to mitigate)--the same rhythm and rhyme, time after time.
"You're really pissing me off," Tiger growls as soon as Lunatic catches his breath, but time runs out and the Hero grabs at thin air. The vigilante likes to believe that Bunny's ears have perked, for as soon as Tiger falls to the streets like a deadweight, Bunny descends fast enough to turn gravity green. Hail fills the absence, that rush of tappity tap tap tap tap tap
tap
A flick of a coat and he disappears.
IV. we can watch the world devour in its pain
tap
the corridor stretches on
The grandfather clock taps lightly, gleefully, for it's almost to the hour. The boy opens the door of his bedroom and peaks out into the foggy darkness. Far above, the clouds rush against the night sky and stream down the endless corridor. Facing the impossible hallway that leads to the end of the world, the boy steps out of his room, steps quietly, lightly, hush dear, don't let him hear.
don't let Papa hear you
Identical, closed doors line the path. The boy slips out of his room and, one ragged breath at a time, presses his ears against the walls. He listens, but only the grandfather clock taps, tap tap tap
tap
It's one.
Yuri gasps awake.
V.
do you know how stars are born?
there's this cloud of light
a hazy nursery of fireworks and anticipation
crack crack
pop
one day
the fireworks dim and the
cloud contracts
light gathers in the center and then
shines
a new star
Do you know how stars die?
VI. I can't remember if everything's the same
On the morning after Christmas, smoke and sirens greet Yuri’s nonplussed face when he returns home. Before the police can pull him back, his body has hurled itself against the flames licking the front door. With panic biting against his heels, the man struggles up the stairs and into the hidden closet where he has kept the spare costumes and masks. Time blurs, blurs and smudges like damp charcoal, because before he can blink, his hands stuff a mask and cape into a black bag, Blue Rose tears off his ceiling, and the world freezes over.
He blinks.
"Are you okay?" the Hero shouts as she leaps down to his side. "Here, grab my arm."
I'm more than capable of escaping by myself, but Yuri bites down on those incriminating words. Instead, he chokes out, "My mother?"
"Sky High has carried her to safety, but she's inhaled a lot of smoke."
Yuri attempts to gauge his feelings, but the urgent need to take a breath of fresh air complicates any mental processes. He allows Blue Rose to slip a rather short arm under his shoulders, and pretends to require assistance when descending the icy stairs.
His mother will not look him in the face.
It's probably better this way, anyway. Some young paramedic hovers over his shoulder as Yuri checks his own pulse, examines his own (minor) cuts and scrapes with a small hand mirror, and uses a shock blanket to wipe soot off his forehead. His mother will not look him in the face, fine, that's fine, everything's fine, she looks fine really, he's fine as well, and that's why she's going to the hospital. Putting on his haughtiest face, Yuri orders the bewildered paramedics to ship his mother to the hospital immediately.
"... don't you want to ride with her?" one of the paramedics asks faintly.
Yuri just sighs.
VII. shouldn't me like a stranger, like you want to believe
There's a drumming in his once upon a time heart, an elastic ripple of a hydrostatic ghost. Yuri moves down the corridor and opens the first door. As the room lashes out and engulfs him whole, a narrow bed plows out and flips him supine. Moonlight filters through the blinds and spirals across the dusky air like cobwebs, and pale blue slits shine against Yuri's eggshell whites. A bulky silhouette moves across the wall, past the dolls, past the frills, past the mirrors that glaze over like frost, and puts a finger against his cruel lips. Yuri’s fingers clutch against the bed frame. As the bulky silhouette blocks the moon, and that cruel, mocking face grows darker against the white halo tracing around Legend's skull.
There's a drumming in his once upon a time heart, and it expands across the room. Time rewinds; the bed grows or his limbs shrink, but Yuri never knows. His eggshell whites grow wider and wider, but the hydrostatic ghost covering his once upon a time heart remains shocked still. Legend smiles, and slides a finger down the blinds. Clack clack clack, and the moonlight halo splinters. Clack clack clack. Shadows dance against the wall, against Yuri's skin like skeletons, and in the nest of lunacy, Yuri suddenly feels sober, too sober, too sober.
He's too sober.
Legend turns and moonlight sparks in his hand.
Legend turns and moonlight sparks in his hand.
Legend turns and moonlight sparks in his hand.
Yuri shouts.
"You were shouting again."
He wakes. The thin blur between the impossible and the probable melts, and in the darkness, he spots a ruffled lump of hair leaning against the foot of the bed. Right. Yuri rolls over, and eyes the digital clock--the clock sporting Barnaby's stupid grinning face. Kaede's room. He's in Kaburagi Kaede's room. His feet reach past the mattress and with little effort, he can kick Kotetsu's head. Ah. Even with only a hint of moonlight spinning through the room, Yuri lifts the blanket over his face.
"Kaede used to have nightmares too, you know," Kotetsu continues.
"I'm fine," Yuri murmurs against the blanket. "You can go back to sleep."
"What was it about?"
"I don't remember."
But Kotetsu proves relentless. "Ah. Hmm. You know, it really helps to talk it over. Since you got here ..."
"I got here two days ago."
"Yeah, well. Then that's two nights, right? Do you have kids?"
Yuri pauses. He peeks over the blankets with absolute disbelief, but no one laughs. "I am ... No ..."
"Oh. Oh right. Sorry. With your being a judge and all--"
"I'm okay. It's okay."
A sigh rushes out from the foot of the bed. Kotetsu stands up and brushes out his pajama pants. He then pats Yuri on the feet, which causes the latter to jump. "Well, um. Uh, good night, then."
Once the door shuts behind Kotetsu's back, Yuri buries his face into the pillow. Legend's silhouette against the splintering moonlight seems a lifetime ago. For crissakes, who pats strangers on the feet?!
VIII. let’s stay together, to see what we become
He shouldn't agree. When Yuri sends off the last of the ambulances and whirls around to catch goddamn Kotetsu standing among the people crowding in front of his now icicle of a house, his stomach sinks. Kotetsu knows him, of course, knows him from work, knows him to be a sort of friend, or at least, a potential friend ... Kotetsu knows him.
And now, Kotetsu has extended his hand.
"I can just book a hotel room," Yuri protests (weak, weak, weak, weak).
"It's the holidays, Judge Petrov," Kotetsu protests back (tempting, tempting, tempting, tempting).
"But I'll be--"
"Kaede went back home this morning. Actually, I just got back from sending her off. Man, kids these days. They want to be everywhere, all at the same time. She says that I never see her, but then I invited her to spend this entire week with me, and she goes running off right after Christmas! I can't ... sorry." A sheepish grin spreads across Kotetsu's ridiculously amiable face as Yuri stares deadpan at that very special cat beard. "Look, all I'm saying is that you and your mom shouldn't have to spend the holidays in the hospital. Or in a hotel."
"My mom needs to stay in the hospital."
"Oh, we can go see her in the hospital then."
We? We?! As the brazen pronoun screeches through Yuri's head, he says, "Mr. Kaburagi, this is really too much. I--"
"Hey. Look. I don't want to spend the holidays alone either."
And so, Yuri shuts his mouth.
IX. all that you mask, the more you reveal
Eight murderers escape before Lunatic's awakening. Judge Petrov calmly faces the first prisoner, a man who tortured and raped his neighbor's daughter. He bites down on his tongue as the defense slaughters the prosecution and rips through the evidence like how the killer ripped through his victim. The judge slams down the gavel, but the prosecution bends over in defeat. Two weeks later, Judge Petrov faces his next killer, who has been personally delivered by Sky High. Eggshell whites peer into those wide, taunting eyes of the wife beater, and Legend's ghost laughs through the murderer's pupils. A shudder ripples through the judge's body, but he once more bites down on his tongue.
You must not sit still.
Five murderers later, Judge Petrov simply chews his bottom lip in court. His role is to slam the gavel, to read from the paper, for his power lies just beyond the peripheries of justice. Eggshell whites shine brightly in court, promising judgment promising revenge promising the flames of hell, the end of the impossible corridor, but the killers call the judge’s bluff.
On the night before the eighth murderer, the judge rewatches the tape of the killer's capture. Just as Wild Tiger is about to pounce on the suspect, Judge Petrov pauses the screen and his once upon a time heart skips a beat. It's the first one. It's the first killer. The judge sinks into his face into his palms, and unleashes an uneven breath.
You must not sit still.
You must not let evil loose.
You must not
But he does. As the gavel slams down, a slow smirk slides across the killer’s face. The weak yellow hands of the system grab those blood drenched fists, but cannot keep the promises from dripping off that sick stained smirk, promises of later, promises of more, promises of again, again, and again ... The scent of the killer lingers in the court room, and Judge Petrov’s once upon a time heart swells. Another door opens down the corridor.
And so, when Lunatic's arrow rips through its first target, relief cracks through the air as fiercely as the hydrostatic skeleton dancing over the vigilante's fingers. In the smoky aftermath, with the piercing sirens arriving one step too late too late, Lunatic basks in satisfaction and the blissful tranquility of termination.
X. the lunatics have taken over the asylum
caught up in circles
tangled and blue
all that you find
all that you lose
all that you give
all you receive
and all that you take
all that you leave
XI. when the madman flips the switch
Sometimes, Yuri tries the door far down the corridor, where the air drops to a bone clattering chill. A velvet darkness embraces his shivering shoulders, and when the door closes behind his back, and that man reaches out.
He's so warm, he's so warm, and his breath smells like spice.
"Kotetsu, I--" Yuri begins urgently, but the man's urgency comes first and those broad shoulders push him against the door. Yesterday's stubble slides against his jaw and fine hot mist outlines the peripheries of his scar to leave want and more in its wake. Yuri's hands reach behind the man's neck, softly, slowly, at first, but then the older man grabs his waist, and traces circles, circles down the low dip of his back and over his thighs.
A whimper escapes Yuri's lips and he attempts, "Kotetsu, I have to tell you--" but the man cares not for words. He pushes him down, down against the velvet darkness which suddenly grows too warm, so Yuri sheds his oxford that clings like a second skin. His lips brush up Yuri's arms, and then that wet tongue licks up his shoulders and across the nape of his neck. Yuri swallows, but the man has already undone his belt.
"Kotetsu, look, I am--" Yuri gasps out, and nearly loses his resolution when the older man pulls Yuri's hips onto his lap and grinds their stiff cocks together. Those words melt into a moan, and Yuri bites against Kotetsu's shoulder as the man forces his hips to grind faster and faster, harder and hard--
"Kotetsu!" Yuri suddenly shouts, and forces their bodies apart. "I ... " he begins, rather lamely. "I am..."
"I know."
"What?"
But there are better things than conversation, as the man seems to desperately want to prove, over and over again. One hand strips Yuri's pants off before the younger man can recover from his shock, and just before Yuri is bent over, those eggshell whites catch the hunger gleaming off of those burning eyes. The tiger has found his prey, and licks his lips. Yuri bites down on the velvet darkness when the man thrusts, and screams.
XII. if you need to crash and burn
Yuri imagines that he has made some terrible life decisions before, but he currently cannot think of any worse than having agreed to temporarily stay with Kaburagi Kotetsu. The latter, after having repeatedly apologized for the small bed, has set him up in his daughter's room. It is only then, when Kotetsu, whistling cheerfully, leaves in search for a spare bathrobe, does reality finally slap Yuri across the face.
Wild Tiger.
He is living with Wild Tiger.
He is living with Wild Tiger; he is not living alone.
He, with a telltale blazing loud scar covered by makeup, is living with Wild Tiger.
Under Barnaby's bright plastic glare from the wall, Yuri rubs his temples. Well, at least he has eliminated all evidence of vigilante activities from the scorched house, and has managed to not only save his costume, but also a spare bottle of foundation. He glances the oversized mirror gracing the opposing wall. Perhaps it is a good thing that Kotetsu has set him up in an adolescent girl's room.
That night, Kotetsu cooks up some fried rice and sets out two plates. Yuri later glances into the refrigerator, and predicts that they will have fried rice again with shrimp instead of chicken. And perhaps, on the night after that-- Yuri bites down on his bottom lip. No. The night after that, he should leave. He should have left. He should be gone.
He should be a lot of things. Yuri stares at the shrimp in the fridge as his brain fires excuse after excuse.
Normality, however, sets in fast. When Yuri stays overtime the next day, his phone rings and his brain does not even question reality when Kotetsu calls out a greeting.
"I'm staying late today for work," Yuri explains politely. "Please eat without me."
"Oh come on, it's the holidays."
"Actually, today's a work day."
"No, it's the holidays," Kotetsu's voice insists. "Do you even get overtime pay? Look. It's almost New Years. Come home."
Come home.
They have fried rice again.
Yuri picks at his shrimp as Kotetsu replays the Christmas greetings left on his voice mail. The lawyer averts his gaze to a crack on the back wall when an effervescent smile floods Kotetsu's face.
beep
"Ah, Kotetsu-san, it's not like ... I wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas or anything ... Merry Christmas ... See you tomorrow."
beep
"Merry Christmas, Kotetsu-san! .... and Merry Christmas again!"
beep
"MMMMM Kotetsu honey, where are you tonight? Are you with the little darling, ooooh, tell her that Auntie Nathan wishes you both a Merry Christmas all right? Mmm just between you and me, I think that I'm getting--"
beep
"KOTETSU, HELP ME NATHAN HAS A HAND ON MY--"
beep
"Kotetsu, I hope you and your daughter are enjoying your holidays. Thank you for asking earlier, but I will be spending this holiday abroad as, you know, we don't get many vacation days. I wish you a Merry Christmas, and I look forward to seeing you in a few days. Perhaps we can enjoy New Years together. Again, Merry Christmas!"
beep
"Ah, Barnaby is always so formal," Kotetsu pouts at the answering machine. "But hey, maybe he'll be back for New Years. Hey, Yuri, what do you think of that?"
"Hmmm?" Yuri asks as he keeps those eggshell whites carefully trained on the wall cracks.
"What do you think about spending New Years together with Barnaby?"
Yuri clamps down on the sudden urge to throw his plate, but manages to lie.
XIII. sing a happy tune, the boy who cries through you
Let me tell you about this anger.
Let me tell you about this anger which has burned inside, burned inside for so long that I've emptied my heart out. I am a dead star, Kotetsu, because there's this cold hard pit, there's this cold hard pit of when all of my yesterdays compressed furiously into a black black grave.
Let me tell you about this anger, this anger which words cannot explain and tears cannot shed. Its fingers wrap around my neck, and sometimes they squeeze so tight that I cannot release. Most times (I know), I hide it well. I hide it well, and you don't know because I've shoved everything behind the locked doors leading down to the graves where stars flicker and die.
Let me tell you about this anger, its emptiness and my attempts. With every kill, with every scumbag I wipe off the streets, I check inside. I pause, pause, take a moment, is it there, is there something, is it filled, am I whole, am I whole, am I whole
am I whole
am I still angry
am I still burning
let me tell you
let me tell you
please understand
I am burning out
XIV. give me life, give me life
On the night before New Year’s Eve, Yuri packs up his things and stuffs his opaque bag into a larger disguise. He's found a new apartment, a new place where he can set up camp, but before he can even maneuver out of Kaede's room to announce the news, Kotetsu bursts in and presents two tickets to the planetarium.
"I actually won them at work," Kotetsu explains sheepishly, and Yuri's resolution collapses like a house of cards.
But this time, the brilliant blanket sweeping across the night sky does not spark his once upon a time heart. He, with hands folded across his lap, sits quietly as the stars rotate with the speaker's voice across the dome. Beside him, Kotetsu releases "ooohs" and "ahhhs" with so much enthusiasm that the young girl behind them begins to fuss. Yuri tosses a glare over his shoulder, and under the soft glow of the spiraling planets, his eggshell whites swiftly shut the situation down.
When the speaker ends the show, Yuri gathers his jacket and begins to stand. Under the dim starlight, Kotetsu grabs his arm.
"No, wait."
The lawyer steadies his breath. "What?"
"I want to stay here just a while longer."
"We have to go."
"Not until they kick us out," Kotetsu protests with an extra dose of puppy eyes.
Defeated, Yuri leans back against the chair.
And so, they sit there, staring at the makeshift night sky as the Milky Way shimmers and drifts across the heavens. A sun floats past every so often, and Yuri's eggshell whites follow its blazing path with a measure of lost innocence. The planetarium soon shuts off its music, but Kotetsu's low voice softens the deafening claustrophobia by counting the impossible stars.
Dreams touch across Yuri’s forehead. Somewhere beyond the velvet darkness, beyond where Kotetsu's voice drifts in and out, he slides down the endless corridor and reaches for another door. Just as he is about to turn the knob, Kotetsu's voice breaks in and asks, "Yuri?"
"Hmmm?"
"Thank you."
Those eggshell whites fly open and Yuri swallows his stammer. "Why?"
"For keeping an old man company." Kotetsu smiles, and continues to count.
fin
FFST
01. Collide - The lunatics have taken over the asylum
02. Smashing Pumpkins - The beginning is the end is the beginning
03. Collide - Like you want to believe
04. Daniel Powter - Give me life
05. Triple H - Haiiro no suiyoubi (cover)
06. Savage Garden - Crash and burn