Chili's Tonight
Here are more unrelated chunks:
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"And we thought we had it rough!" the shivering peanut butter jar stammered to the relish as the peas were taken out of the freezer above.
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Loosing his footing, the man with the terribly scarred face toppled down the stairs leading to the church.
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Alien Almer: (grinning with a cocked eyebrow) "Haha. Well look there. Today the Earth turned upside-down, and no one noticed!"
Alien Quinn: (dabbing his lips on the cloth napkin jovially) "Ho, ho, that's--but pause a moment I don't follow--wouldn't they all notice down there?"
Alien Almer: (lowering his glass) "That's just the thing. They don't notice. Not a hair. Gravity holds them center-wise, feet planted towards the core. To them, all is as it was. The Earth turned upside-down, and no one noticed. Not a soul."
Alien Quinn: (exhaling) "Fuck."
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"Kiss me," the therapist howled, propping up his patient's pillow.
"I'm here because I'm trying to adjust to life without lips, you senseless bastard!"
Glumly, the therapist gathered his books and papers.
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"Well that was awkward!" the Tootsie Pop owl hooted on his way home from the Ring Pop village.
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Spirits broken and plastic novelty tongues drooped flaccid, the family retreated back to their Ford Excalibur, the band members of KISS never having shown up.
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"Thank God It's Tuesday!" Kyle exclaimed. No one could relate.
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Missy: (With a southern accent, playing with her matted hair) "I'm 18 now. I wanna pose in those pictures on the web sites where my nipples are covered by rose petals until ya give your credit card pin. That's how good mine'll be. That's how good."
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"Asshole," the hare muttered, dumping the tortoise's body into the lake.
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Mick stooped behind his churro stand, his underwear sagging and obvious congealings of churro sugar nesting in his beard. It was six-thirty in the morning, and no one wanted a churro. The park had just opened and the guy in the Pluto suit was already calling him names like Old Hickory Stick. It wasn't that Mick resented looking like Andrew Jackson, but Pluto had a harshness about his voice that swelled Mick's throat and glossed his eyes. An hour later, an obese mother with a Haunted Mansion XXL and a Donald Duck bill visor grunted up an order for two churros. She was alone. As Mick bent down to fetch the breaded rods that had, without his intention, become his life's only legitimate legacy, Mick suddenly spouted a bloody nose. There Mick stood, a lanky, crooked gargoyle with an off-brown baton in each hand, bleeding profusely in neon red down his white service apron. The morbidly obese woman screamed like a wide-eyed piccolo pete, and Mick retired stone-faced to the park restroom where he allowed himself to bleed to death.
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In a sour mood that evening, Old King Cole said some things he would often later regret to the merry fiddlers three.
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The talent show ended in disaster when Tina flubbed up the card trick.
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Both surgeons hiccuped.
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Thom waited tearfully as the hole in his hot air balloon ripped larger and larger, the dark ocean cackling below.
---------------------------------------------
"And we thought we had it rough!" the shivering peanut butter jar stammered to the relish as the peas were taken out of the freezer above.
---------
Loosing his footing, the man with the terribly scarred face toppled down the stairs leading to the church.
---------
Alien Almer: (grinning with a cocked eyebrow) "Haha. Well look there. Today the Earth turned upside-down, and no one noticed!"
Alien Quinn: (dabbing his lips on the cloth napkin jovially) "Ho, ho, that's--but pause a moment I don't follow--wouldn't they all notice down there?"
Alien Almer: (lowering his glass) "That's just the thing. They don't notice. Not a hair. Gravity holds them center-wise, feet planted towards the core. To them, all is as it was. The Earth turned upside-down, and no one noticed. Not a soul."
Alien Quinn: (exhaling) "Fuck."
---------
"Kiss me," the therapist howled, propping up his patient's pillow.
"I'm here because I'm trying to adjust to life without lips, you senseless bastard!"
Glumly, the therapist gathered his books and papers.
---------
"Well that was awkward!" the Tootsie Pop owl hooted on his way home from the Ring Pop village.
---------
Spirits broken and plastic novelty tongues drooped flaccid, the family retreated back to their Ford Excalibur, the band members of KISS never having shown up.
---------
"Thank God It's Tuesday!" Kyle exclaimed. No one could relate.
---------
Missy: (With a southern accent, playing with her matted hair) "I'm 18 now. I wanna pose in those pictures on the web sites where my nipples are covered by rose petals until ya give your credit card pin. That's how good mine'll be. That's how good."
---------
"Asshole," the hare muttered, dumping the tortoise's body into the lake.
---------
Mick stooped behind his churro stand, his underwear sagging and obvious congealings of churro sugar nesting in his beard. It was six-thirty in the morning, and no one wanted a churro. The park had just opened and the guy in the Pluto suit was already calling him names like Old Hickory Stick. It wasn't that Mick resented looking like Andrew Jackson, but Pluto had a harshness about his voice that swelled Mick's throat and glossed his eyes. An hour later, an obese mother with a Haunted Mansion XXL and a Donald Duck bill visor grunted up an order for two churros. She was alone. As Mick bent down to fetch the breaded rods that had, without his intention, become his life's only legitimate legacy, Mick suddenly spouted a bloody nose. There Mick stood, a lanky, crooked gargoyle with an off-brown baton in each hand, bleeding profusely in neon red down his white service apron. The morbidly obese woman screamed like a wide-eyed piccolo pete, and Mick retired stone-faced to the park restroom where he allowed himself to bleed to death.
---------
In a sour mood that evening, Old King Cole said some things he would often later regret to the merry fiddlers three.
---------
The talent show ended in disaster when Tina flubbed up the card trick.
---------
Both surgeons hiccuped.
---------
Thom waited tearfully as the hole in his hot air balloon ripped larger and larger, the dark ocean cackling below.