Wednesday Wisdom
With meditation we train in settling down with whatever we're feeling, including the addictive urge to avoid discomfort at any cost. We train in just staying present, open and awake, no matter what's going on.
~~Pema Chodron
I have to confess, it's been an uncomfortable few weeks. No, no, not with anything big or awful. It's just the small matter of some of my weaker personality traits surfacing and wanting to hang around for a bit. You know, the traits that we often gloss over or try to quickly pass by because, well, because they tend to be an uncomfortable reminder that we're human. That we have flaws and make mistakes. And then the mind tends to jump in with all that judgment and doesn't that just cook up the perfect stew of discomfort!
So, I've been trying to figure out what the balance is between just being very present for the discomfort and downright wallowing in it. Things are changing this year for me, the time spent on my son's education is winding down and because I don't have a set path yet, it's easy to fritter away my time. My writing is all stumbly and erratic. I can't seem to settle down and work on meaningful things. My mind slyly offers up escapes--like wouldn't it be so nice to be kayaking on Elk Lake rather than dealing with all the mucky stuff that keeps coming up in my life these days. But really, my heart knows that only what's present now is alive. To yearn for something different immediately takes me out of being awake to what's showing up in front of me.
Oh...hmmm...look what showed up. :)
~~Pema Chodron
I have to confess, it's been an uncomfortable few weeks. No, no, not with anything big or awful. It's just the small matter of some of my weaker personality traits surfacing and wanting to hang around for a bit. You know, the traits that we often gloss over or try to quickly pass by because, well, because they tend to be an uncomfortable reminder that we're human. That we have flaws and make mistakes. And then the mind tends to jump in with all that judgment and doesn't that just cook up the perfect stew of discomfort!
So, I've been trying to figure out what the balance is between just being very present for the discomfort and downright wallowing in it. Things are changing this year for me, the time spent on my son's education is winding down and because I don't have a set path yet, it's easy to fritter away my time. My writing is all stumbly and erratic. I can't seem to settle down and work on meaningful things. My mind slyly offers up escapes--like wouldn't it be so nice to be kayaking on Elk Lake rather than dealing with all the mucky stuff that keeps coming up in my life these days. But really, my heart knows that only what's present now is alive. To yearn for something different immediately takes me out of being awake to what's showing up in front of me.
Oh...hmmm...look what showed up. :)