I never finished this… it was just something stupid I wrote in my early college days while I was obsessing over someone. As you can probably tell just from reading this, our communication was a little off... perhaps WAY off. We never got together because we couldn’t get past that little problem. It was mostly my fault of course, due to my own short comings, but hey, what can you do?
The days slowly pass by as your image grows stronger in my mind.
God, I miss you!
Yet with your absence, I grow fearful of what you think of me.
I know my inordinate actions have left a huge indention of your overall opinion of me.
This, I know for sure.
I want you so badly, yet my overwhelming fear and anxiety push me away from you as it has everyone else.
I'm so enchanted by you.
I'd give anything to see you again.
(2 weeks later)
My soul is shattered with your constant absence.
You have taken over my thoughts and my dreams.
My dearest friend has told you my secret of loving you.
Knowing that, I raise many questions.
I have constantly questioned the honesty of my source considering it has been so revealing,
Yet so secretive of the encounter.
It has stated you love me in return, yet you question whether I love you as well.
It has stated that you were informed to talk to me as soon as you could...
yet the days pass and still no word.
So is this source telling the truth?
Do you have feelings for me though you constantly ignore me?
Should I take the chance and call you myself; just to break the silence?
What should I expect as I have no idea what has been said?
Are you avoiding me?
Do you think I'm avoiding you?
So many questions have been created from such a small conversation.
Perhaps too many.
If you do feel the same as I feel, then why am I torturing myself with procrastination?
Being shy and fearful is like being sentenced to a life of solitary confinement.
I'm so very scared of love, yet I want it so badly.
Never the less, I can't stop thinking about you and one of us must break the ice.
(1 week later)
My patience is falling faster than the setting sun.
I can no longer wait on you to state your feelings.
Once again, I must break the silence between us.
I suppose this is just one of the many things we have in common: procrastination.
I'm making one, and only one, last attempt to win your heart.
If that fails, then I will surrender to my loneliness as it has so tempted me to do in the past few twilights.
Surely I would have heard from you by now if what was said is true!
I will make this attempt, but I will do so with great fear, as love is one of my greatest.
I know, however, that I must put my fear aside... for fear is the most ruthless killer of creation.