The Never Land - Original Buffy Season 8 One-Shot
I mentioned a while ago that I had written a one-off for Buffy Season 8 and was intending to submit it to Dark Horse before I actually read their website and discovered that they don't even read scripts for pre-existing title, because of some kind of copy-right thing.
I was quite disappointed as the story was important to me and I had worked long and hard on it. It represents weeks of research and feverish writing and rewriting. I've been hanging on to it for a year and a half, with some vague hope that another way of submitting it to Joss & Co. would present itself. But I've come to accept reality now, and so I am posting it here on lj.
I don't imagine many will read it, seeing as I have been so sporadic in my posting, and a hundred times worse when it comes to commenting on my Flist. Also, this story does not involve any of the BtVS characters everyone knows and loves, but a cast of entirely original characters. I love them, though, and I hope that anyone who reads this will as well.
Part of the premise is that, aside from the TV ads, the Scoobies have other ways of tracking down slayers as well. More time-intensive ways, but they are what's needed for finding slayers is certain parts of the world.
The main idea, however, builds on the theme of slayerhood as empowerment.
This is the story of Amala, a Palestinian Christian, and a slayer living in a society where every form of power is denied her...
"CAP" indicates a caption
"SFX" indicates sound effects
"OP" stands for "off panel"
PAGE ONE (one panel)
Panel 1. The bright Middle-Eastern sun is bearing down on a barren slope covered in rocks and rubble. It’s a bleak world, almost monochromatic; even the people appear to be washed out by the sun, drained of life and colour. There are three boys, all around 10 years old. The smallest boys is named Zaki, the biggest is Jamar. The middle boy is inconsequential - just there for the sake of symmetry. We see the boys from a low angle, as if we were peeking at them over the dead, bloodied body they are staring at.
CAP/AMALA:
"A lot of bad things happen here, but no one really talks about it..."
PAGE TWO (seven panels)
Panel 1. The hill from a distance, surmounted by a neat and shiny new community, while a village of very old, small houses lies at its feet. Some of the houses have been reduced to rubble - there’s a bulldozer in the foreground clearing some of it away. A wall made of 20-foot high slabs of concrete is in the process of being constructed around the hill. Its wending path will have to veer again to go around, rather than through, the edge of town. The boys are running downhill as fast as they can.
CAP/AMALA:
"We’re different that way. Do you know what I mean? It’s important you understand."
Panel 2. A family stares with blank faces at the pile of rubble that had once been their home. In the background a teenage girl with long black hair and her mother look on in sympathy as they walk up the sloping street. The teenager is Amala and she’s not like everyone else; she has colour, vibrancy. Her mother (hereafter referred to as Mama) is just as bleak as everyone else.
MAMA:
That’s what awaits us --
AMALA:
Mama, don’t --
Panel 3. Mama and Amala have stopped at the arched door of a house at the very base of the hill and Mama is fishing through her bag. We’re close enough to see that Amala is wearing a cross around her neck.
MAMA:
I’m sorry Amala. I wish I could promise you a future --
AMALA:
You don’t have to promise me anything, mama. Just don’t talk like that.
MAMA:
It’s hard not to when I look around at the world...
Panel 4. Having found her keys, Mama starts to open the door. Amala is smiling at her, trying to cheer her up.
MAMA:
And I had another dream last night --
AMALA:
Me too. I was playing with a yo-yo in a graveyard. Dreams don’t really mean any--
Panel 5. From the inside of the house, we see Amala and Mama framed in the doorway, over which an icon hangs. Amala already running forward, and both of them are distressed by the sight of Zaki sitting on the ground and crying.
AMALA:
Zaki!
Panel 6. Amala kneeling by Zaki’s side, on the floor by a small Orthodox shrine. Zaki's eyes are downcast, looking at a toy truck he’s holding in his lap.
ZAKI:
W-we found a-a... on the hill... it was Mr. Hossein... I-I think...
Panel 7. Amala embraces Zaki.
CAP/HOLLY:
"Like there’s not enough bad in the world already! I just can’t understand it --"
PAGE THREE (seven panels)
Panel 1. Close on a newspaper headline. Something about a bombing. The speech bubbles of Alvis should be unique. Maybe pink.
ALVIS (OP):
Translation charm wearing off?
HOLLY (OP, whisper):
No, I mean I don’t understand why --
ALVIS (OP):
Traffic jams...
Panel 2. Holly - a blonde, pigtailed, freckled, all-American teenager (more colourful than the natives) - sitting in the backseat of a taxicab, reading the newspaper which, now that we’re not sharing her point of view, is in Hebrew. The voice of this Alvis person seems to be coming from inside her.
ALVIS:
...They piss everybody off.
HOLLY (whisper):
Very not funny, Alvis.
Panel 3. The cabbie looks at Holly in his rear-view mirror.
CABBIE:
Did you say something, miss?
HOLLY:
Oh. Uh, well... I was just wondering...
Panel 4. Exterior shot, high and wide: the cab is stuck in gridlock. The main hold-up is a military checkpoint that they have yet to reach. A helicopter hovers overhead.
HOLLY:
Are we there yet?
Panel 5. Amala pulls on her jacket and heads for the door while Mama frets over Zaki.
AMALA:
I need to hurry.
MAMA:
But how do you expect to help him? You can’t change anything.
AMALA:
But maybe I can.
CAP/AMALA
"I know I can..."
Panel 6. Mama sees Amala off as she heads down the busy but dismal street lined with blank faces.
MAMA:
Be back before dark!
CAP/AMALA:
"I know because I’m not like everybody else. Since last year I’ve had this power..."
Panel 7. Low angle. Amala stops short as she comes up against someone who’s casting a big shadow. All we can really see of him is one thick arm holding a plank of wood like a club. His name is Shamar.
CAP/AMALA:
"I’ve had hope."
PAGE FOUR (seven panels)
Panel 1. Amala stands firm, braced for a fight.
SHAMAR (OP):
Get out of my way, Amala.
AMALA:
I only want to help you Shamar.
Panel 2. On Shamar. A young man about Amala’s age, he looks like a cross between a gorilla and a brick wall. Jamar and a woman with a tear-stained face wearing a hijab stand behind him, looking anxious.
SHAMAR:
You can do that by helping me avenge my father... Or by getting out of my way.
Panel 3. Holly’s on a street corner now, still holding her newspaper, the taxi driving away behind her. Farther away, across the street, Amala and Shamar are arguing. Holly looks apprehensively over her shoulder at a tank trundling down the road. Alvis’ voice still seems to be coming from inside her.
HOLLY:
Let’s hurry up with this one, Alvis. I don’t feel safe here.
ALVIS:
Yeah, sure. Whenever you’re ready.
Panel 4. Close on Holly unzipping her jacket. Something flies out of it and off panel, leaving a pink trail of light.
HOLLY:
Oh yeah, sorry.
ALVIS (OP):
Finally! Air! Hygiene tip here: Secret’s strong enough for a man but not for a slayer.
HOLLY:
Like you even have a nose. Just find her.
ALVIS (OP):
Not even a "please?" What am I...
Panel 5. Close on Alvis - a little glowy ball of pink light hovering in mid-air. (Note: Alvis is referred to with the feminine pronoun even though, being a ball of light, she’s technically asexual)
ALVIS:
...your personal guide, conjured from the ether by your demi-goddess boss, magically bequeathed with the knowledge to conveniently answer your every need and tied to your very soul so that I am bound to serve you?
Panel 6. Holly rolls her eyes at Alvis. Behind her, Shamar is trying to get past Amala.
HOLLY:
Uh, yeah.
ALVIS:
Well, I brought you this far, you can do the rest yourself.
Panel 7. Inset panel, close on Alvis, Holly’s rolled-up newspaper raised threateningly over her.
HOLLY (OP):
I’ll swat you.
ALVIS:
She’s right behind you.
PAGE FIVE (seven panels)
Panel 1. Holly turns around in time to see Amala sock Shamar in the jaw, making him fall down.
HOLLY:
Hm. Guess I could have spotted that one on my own.
ALVIS:
Told you so. I’m not called "all-knowing" for nothing. Let’s go --
HOLLY:
Or not. We’ll wait ‘til she’s alone. Unless you want another scene like Ternopyl...
Panel 2. Now on the ground, Shamar glares up at Amala.
SHAMAR:
Just let me go, Amala!
AMALA:
No! They’ll kill you!
SHAMAR:
I don’t care!
Panel 3. Amala looks hurt. Shamar’s mother and brother hang back behind her.
AMALA:
But I do. We all care about you... Think of what you have to live for, Shamar...
Panel 4. Close on Shamar. Amala is finally getting through to him and he looks a little ashamed of himself.
AMALA (OP):
Think of us.
SHAMAR:
I’m sorry.
Panel 5. Close on Shamar and Amala’s hands reaching towards each other so she can help him up.
SHAMAR (OP):
You’re my best friend, Amala.
Panel 6. Shamar and Amala side by side, still holding hands. Though he’s calmed down, Shamar still looks nearly mutinous. Amala stands close to him so she can whisper.
SHAMAR:
I just need to do something.
AMALA (whisper):
Come to my class with me.
SHAMAR:
I said I need to do something.
AMALA (whisper):
It will make you feel better, I promise...
Panel 7. The faces of about 5 young people arranged in two rows, listening attentively.
CAP/AMALA:
"...it makes you feel connected, powerful."
TEACHER (OP):
"...pray to God that he will send someone to redeem them from this ill treatment and from the insults of the barbarians...
PAGE SIX (six panels)
Panel 1. A benevolent-looking old man reads to about 10 students from The Prince. Some of the students have to sit on the floor as they’re in someone’s kitchen and there aren’t enough chairs. Amala and Shamar are at the back of the group.
TEACHER:
"One can see every Italian is ready, everyone is eager to rally to the colours, if only someone will raise them high..." And that’s all we have time for. We’ll finish chapter 26 and have a discussion about Machiavelli’s ideas next class.
Panel 2. Shamar and Amala start to follow the other students to the backdoor. They don’t notice the shifty-looking student just in front of them seems to be listening in on what they’re saying.
SHAMAR:
It’s just talk.
AMALA:
No, it’s more...
Panel 3. On Amala talking to Shamar. The shifty-looking student is just ducking out the door.
AMALA:
...they tried to stop us going to the university, but we learn anyways. This is resistance, this is power.
Panel 4. Shamar and Amala step out the door and into a back-alley. It’s different from the Sunnydale back-alleys - it curves, it’s narrower, and the backs of the buildings are staggered instead of lined up straight and neat. But, as in Sunnydale, it’s inevitably dark - the sun is low in the sky now and the buildings are casting long shadows.
SHAMAR:
But it doesn’t change anything --
HASSAN (OP):
Hey...
Panel 5. Amala and Shamar turn to see Hassan (the shifty student) approaching them. Amala regards him suspiciously.
AMALA:
Hassan?
HASSAN (whisper):
Do you want to do more than just talk?
AMALA:
Like what?
Panel 6. We see the three students talking in a tight circle - Hassan looking up at Shamar - as if spying at them from around the corner.
HASSAN (whisper):
Some of us are trying to organize a resistance. There’s a meeting tonight, if you’re interested.
PAGE SEVEN (eight panels)
Panel 1. On Hassan, turned towards Amala now.
SHAMAR (OP):
I’ll come.
AMALA (OP):
No, Shamar...
HASSAN:
You’re welcome too, Amala. We know you can fight like a man.
Panel 2. Hassan seems peeved that Amala ignores him. She’s looking beseechingly at Shamar, who’s getting frustrated by all the inaction.
SHAMAR:
I thought you wanted a resistance?
AMALA:
Not this kind. It’s been tried before. You’re just going to get people killed.
SHAMAR:
Doing nothing gets people killed too.
Panel 3. Amala’s been stung and she looks it. Shamar looks back at her almost apologetically as he follows Hassan into the shadows.
HASSAN:
Goodbye Amala.
AMALA (small):
I have to get home before dark anyhow.
Panel 4. Amala, head bowed, walks out of the alley and onto the twilit street. The green doors and shutters of the shops are already closed and locked.
Panel 5. Amala in profile. She’s stopped in her tracks, head up and eyes wide. There does appear to be the long shadow of a person creeping up behind her.
Panel 6. Amala glances over her shoulder, but the shadow is gone.
Panel 7. She turns back and is surprised to see Holly standing in front of her and smiling in her face.
HOLLY:
Hi!
AMALA:
AHH!
Panel 8. Amala acts reflexively and punches Holly in the nose.
SFX:
WHOP!
PAGE EIGHT (nine panels)
Panel 1. Holly grimaces and holds her nose in pain. Amala keeps her fists raised and eyes Alvis suspiciously.
HOLLY:
Ow! Okay, definitely a slayer.
AMALA:
What? Who are you?
HOLLY:
My name’s Holly...
Panel 2. Close on Amala, intrigued by what Holly goes on to say.
HOLLY (OP):
And I’m like you. You’re different from other people, right? Special. We both are...
Panel 3. Close on Holly, a smile on her face (she likes this part).
HOLLY
We’re slayers. We have power, and a destiny to serve the forces of goo-
Panel 4. Holly is suddenly indignant - Amala is walking away from her.
HOLLY:
Hey! Where do you think you’re going?
AMALA:
I want to hear what you have to say, but we have to get inside now.
Panel 5. Extreme low angle of Holly as she catches up to Amala. Above her, a drone aircraft buzzes through the sky.
HOLLY:
What’s the rush?
AMALA (OP):
Bad things happen at night.
Panel 6. Bird’s-eye-view of the edge of town. Two teensy girls are approaching a teensy woman standing outside a teensy house near the 20-foot wall at the edge of town.
AMALA:
Bad things happen during the day too, but they’re worse at night.
MAMA:
At last you’re home! I was getting worried!
Panel 7. Mama lets the two girls and Alvis into the house. She is, of course, curious about Holly, who is all smiles and politeness. Zaki, meanwhile, is staring at Alvis.
MAMA:
Who’s this?
AMALA:
Mama, Zaki, this is Holly. She’s like me.
Panel 8. Zaki points at Alvis, who is hovering over Holly’s shoulder.
ZAKI:
What’s that?
ALVIS:
Call me Al.
HOLLY:
Spirit guide, magically bequeathed with knowledge, bound to my soul so she won’t go running off --
ALVIS:
Which I would ne-
HOLLY:
Yeah. Uh huh. Anyhoo...
Panel 9. Holly turns to Amala.
HOLLY:
I’ve got a lot to tell you...
PAGE NINE (four panels)
Panel 1. Holly and Amala seated across from each other at the table in the middle of the room. Zaki is between them and is looking up at Holly like she’s his new hero. Holly is talking away, and apparently has been for a while; Mama is clearing away the used dishes, but leaves Holly’s newspaper on the table besides her. Amala is practically glowing with excitement.
CAP/AMALA:
"Holly told me about everything. She told me about slayers, about the history, the heritage, the organization, the power..."
CAP/AMALA:
"The power to change the world..."
CAP/AMALA:
"It was everything I had been hoping for."
Panel 2. Zaki goggling at Holly, who smiles back.
ZAKI:
So you fight real monsters?
HOLLY:
Monsters and other evils of all shapes and sizes...
Panel 3. Holly turns to an eager Amala. So does Zaki, looking absolutely thrilled.
HOLLY:
You going to join us?
AMALA:
What do I have to do?
HOLLY:
Just have your things packed by tomorrow and be ready to fly to Rome.
Panel 4. Close on Amala, the picture of disappointment.
AMALA:
I have to leave?
HOLLY (OP):
You have to be trained. The team in Rome’s the clos--
PAGE TEN (eight panels)
Panel 1. Holly bemusedly watches Amala rise from the table and turn away.
AMALA:
I can’t go.
HOLLY:
You can come back.
ALVIS:
Not really.
Panel 2. On Alvis
HOLLY (OP):
Alvis! We don’t force anyone to--
ALVIS:
But you train them to fight demons. There aren’t any demons here...
Panel 3. Close on Holly. She wasn’t expecting that.
ALVIS:
...According to our sources they all left years ago.
HOLLY:
Oh. Um, well, I’m sure they could post her somewhere near--
AMALA (OP):
You don’t understand.
Panel 4. Holly turns to Amala, who is standing by the shrine with her back to everyone.
HOLLY:
Huh?
AMALA:
Bad things happen here all the time. People die...
Panel 5. Holly glances at Zaki, who is staring blankly at the table.
AMALA:
You learn very young here that your life is worth nothing. You have no hope for your future...
Panel 6. On Amala, still turned away from everyone else. Her eyes are cast downwards at Zaki’s truck, which she’s holding in her hands. We can see Holly in the background, watching her.
AMALA:
When I changed it was the first time I felt maybe I had a purpose, a future, the first time I felt alive...
HOLLY:
Then don’t you want to leave?
Panel 7. Amala turns to Holly, indignant. The crucifix hangs on the wall behind her.
AMALA:
Leave my people for dead? My family has lived in this land for 2000 years, I’m not going to give it up. I want to fight evil here!
Panel 8. Agitated, Holly rises from the table.
HOLLY:
Okay, this is human evil you’re talking about. We only deal with demon evil.
PAGE ELEVEN (seven panels)
Panel 1. One big panel would show Amala and Holly facing off from opposite sides of the room, Zaki still sitting at the table between them, but that panel is sliced in two. This half just shows Amala, arms are crossed and glaring, but not in an angry or self-righteous way. She’s disappointed, disillusioned and frustrated.
AMALA:
You mean you only deal with evil that affects you.
HOLLY(OP):
Hey--
AMALA:
Does anyone know what it’s like here where you come from?
HOLLY(OP):
Well, it’s not like people really talk about it.
Panel 2. The other half has Holly standing back from the table, her hands raised defensively. Zaki looks up at her uncertainly.
AMALA (OP):
Because you don’t care.
HOLLY:
No--
ZAKI:
You aren’t going to help us?
HOLLY:
It’s not like I don’t want to--
Panel 3. On Holly, at a total loss.
AMALA (OP):
Then what are you going to do?
HOLLY:
I- I’ll come back tomorrow.
Panel 4. Holly heads for the door, looking over her shoulder, not quite able to meet Amala’s eyes.
HOLLY:
We should both think about what each other has said, and we’ll come to a decision tomorrow.
MAMA (OP):
Wait!
Panel 4. Holly’s point of view: Mama pulling a string over the table (where Zaki is still sitting) to turn out the lights. She’s expressionless, not looking at Holly.
SFX (small):
Click.
MAMA:
Hide Al before you go.
Panel 5. Zaki’s head is bowed in disappointment. Holly holds her jacket so that Alvis, now the only source of light in the room, can fly inside.
HOLLY:
Um... okay.
MAMA:
Only, the settlers on the hill shoot at any light they see down here.
Panel 6. A faint pink glow from Holly’s chest is all the light we have to see by, but it’s enough that we can see her eyes are wide; she’s taken aback by what Mama just told her. Zaki’s expression has also changed; he now has the same mutinous look Shamar wore earlier.
HOLLY:
Why?
ZAKI (small):
Because no one stops them.
PAGE TWELVE (seven panels)
Panel 1. The village in the early morning. The faces of all the buildings are dark, backlit by the sunrise. A black bulldozer framed with red light dominates the foreground.
CAP/ALVIS:
"So it doesn’t matter--"
CAP/HOLLY:
"I didn’t say that..."
Panel 2. High and wide: the road into town. Holly and Alvis’ taxi is once again stuck in gridlock. A helicopter hovers overhead.
HOLLY (whispered):
"I said there’s a difference between humans and demons..."
Panel 3. Zaki climbs the rocky hill, approaching his two friends, who seem to be scrounging around for something.
CAP/HOLLY:
"The difference being that human problems aren’t mine."
CAP/AMALA’S CLASS NOTES:
"They pray to God that he will send someone to redeem them from this ill treatment..."
CAP/HOLLY:
"They can take care of themselves..."
Panel 4. Amala sitting at the table at home and going over her class notes. Behind her, Mama is doing the dishes.
CAP/HOLLY:
"That’s what I should tell Amala, anyways."
CAP/AMALA’S CLASS NOTES:
"...One can see that everyone is ready..."
MAMA:
I had a dream last night...
Panel 5. Close on Mama’s troubled face.
MAMA:
The entire town was dead...
Panel 6. Jamar and his friend collecting rocks. Zaki watches them from a distance.
CAP/MAMA:
"...They had all been turned into vampires."
JAMAR:
One stone for each of us they’ve killed. Look for sharp ones. It’s our turn to make them bleed.
ZAKI:
Hey...
CAP/AMALA’S CLASS NOTES:
"Everyone is eager to rally to the colours..."
Panel 7. On Jamar as Zaki comes up to him.
CAP/AMALA’S CLASS NOTES:
"...if only someone will raise them high."
ZAKI
Can I help?
CAP/HOLLY:
"That’s not right..."
PAGE THIRTEEN (seven panels)
Panel 1. An ambulance has been stopped at the checkpoint. Some of the soldiers are looking curiously in the back at the person on the stretcher covered in bloodied bandages.
HOLLY (OP):
...They’ve pulled over an ambulance. Can they do that?
CABBIE (OP):
They do that all the time, miss.
HOLLY (OP):
Why?
Panel 2. On Holly, leaning out the cab window and frowning indignantly.
CABBIE (OP):
When you live here you learn to stop asking questions.
Panel 3. Close on the handle of the cab door, Holly’s hand about to pull on it.
HOLLY (OP):
Someone should stop them.
ALVIS (OP, whispered):
Holly! Don’t be stupid!
Panel 4. Exterior. A soldier with a very large gun casts a suspicious glance at the cab in the background.
ALVIS (whispered):
Slayer strength isn’t much good against bullets!
Panel 5. Close on Holly, looking out the window. She looks pained.
HOLLY (whispered):
But I want to help them.
9/ALVIS (whispered)
It doesn’t matter anyways...
Panel 6. Back to Mama and Amala, the latter still ostensibly concentrating on her notes.
CAP/ALVIS:
"...Not now. They’re already dead."
MAMA:
I know you think dreams are silly--
AMALA:
I don’t think anything of them at all. They mean nothing--
HASSAN (OP):
AMALA!
Panel 7. Amala and Mama turn to see Hassan at the door, gasping for breath.
HASSAN:
They’re making arrests!
PAGE FOURTEEN (six panels)
Panel 1. Amala twists around in her chair to face Hassan properly, while he rushes forwards and grabs her hand. Mama stands by helplessly.
AMALA:
You need to hide?
HASSAN:
We both do. They got the professor this morning --
AMALA:
They’re arresting our class?
MAMA:
But you didn’t do anything wrong!
Panel 2. Amala trips as Hassan pulls her from her chair and towards the door.
HASSAN:
And they got Shamar last night --
AMALA:
Shamar? What happened?
HASSAN:
He put up a fight and they killed him.
Panel 3. Amala lets Hassan pull her out the door.
HASSAN:
Come on, we have to go!
Panel 4. Extreme long shot, high angle: A small ridge, its side covered in brush. A street climbs up a shallow incline from level ground and runs along the ridge’s edge. Holly walks up the street, Alvis at her side. To her left is the village, to her right, a drop - steep, but not scary. After the street plateaus another connects with it at an almost perpendicular angle. Unseen by Holly, a tank lumbers down this second street, towards the intersection on the ridge. Avoiding all roads, but taking a path between buildings that parallels the tank’s, Zaki, Jamar and their friend clamber down towards the ridge’s edge, each of them carrying some rocks, and start running towards where they know the tank will be, to face it head-on.
HOLLY:
What do you mean there’s nothing I can do?
ALVIS:
It’s too big an issue, you haven’t got the kind of power to--
HOLLY:
Hey...
Panel 5. Over Holly as she comes to the top of the incline. There are three boy throwing stones at something out of sight.
HOLLY:
Isn’t that Zaki? What’s he--
Panel 6. Close on Holly, her eyes wide with alarm, watching the tank fire on the boys off panel.
SFX:
CHAK-A-CHAK-A-CHAK-A-CHAK-A!
PAGE FIFTEEN (five panels)
Panel 1. At the sound of gunfire the few people who were outside scatter to take cover, but Holly bolts forward, Alvis just behind her, towards the three boys lying in their blood on the street.
HOLLY:
Zaki!
Panel 2. Eye-level with the barrel of the tank’s gun, facing it straight-on. A soldier is sitting atop the tank, and fires at Holly as she runs past, but she’s already out of danger - the tank has not reached the intersection yet and the buildings on either side of it act as blinkers.
SFX:
CHAK-A-CHAK-A-CHAK!
Panel 3. Holly barely stops running as she scoops Zaki up.
HOLLY:
We’ll get you safe and then come back for your friends, ‘kay?
ZAKI (weak):
Owww...
Panel 4. Over the shoulder of the tank’s gunner as they come around the corner. He takes aim at the blonde girl running away from him down the street with a boy slung over her shoulder. She’s not far, but has almost reached the corner.
Panel 5. Holly lurches forward as she’s hit in the back. A rubber bullet, about two inches long and an inch in diameter, comes out her front in a spray of blood.
SFX:
CHAK-A-CHAK!
ALVIS:
HOLLY!
HOLLY:
Unh
PAGE SIXTEEN (eight panels)
Panel one: Holly has fallen out of sight, but Alvis hovers over her.
ALVIS:
Holly?
HOLLY (OP, weak)
Ow...
Panel 2. Low angle, Holly is struggling to get up, Zaki still on her back, having fallen over the ridge. Alvis zips off panel, pink light trailing behind her.
HOLLY:
Al, go get Amala, ‘kay?
ALVIS (OP):
On it!
HOLLY (weak):
I think I’m going to need the help.
Panel 3. Long shot: Holly carries a limp Zaki in her arms. Her eyes are half-closed; she looks exhausted.
NEIGHBOUR 1 (OP):
Oh my God!
MAMA (OP):
ZAKI!
Panel 4. Zaki’s mother takes him from Holly’s arms. Grandmotherly Neighbour 1 hurries away to call for help, while Neighbours 2 and 3 (a woman Mama’s age, about 5’ in height, and a tall, thin man with graying hair, respectively) rush forward to see what’s happening and to help. Holly leaves a trail of blood in her path. She is, understandably, is kind of out of it.
MAMA:
Zaki! My baby!
ZAKI (weak):
Mama...
HOLLY:
He was throwing stones, but, y’know, bullets hurt a lot more...
NEIGHBOUR 1:
I’ll go call an ambulance.
Panel 5. Holly smiles hazily, her arms hanging limp at her sides. Neighbour 2 stands nearby, anxiously eying the extensive bloodstains on Holly’s shirt.
NEIGHBOUR (small):
You’re hurt too...
HOLLY:
‘Snothing... "Slayer strength no good against bullets"... Ha!
Panel 6. Holly faints. An alarmed Neighbour 2 catches her.
NEIGHBOUR 2:
Uh... Help!
Panel 7. Long shot: Neighbour 3 helps Neighbour 2 carry Holly inside the house.
NEIGHBOUR 2:
She’s lost a lot of blood. I’m surprised she made it this far.
NEIGHBOUR 3:
Let’s just get her inside now and be surprised later.
HOLLY (weakly):
I’m okay... happy to help...
Panel 8. Close on Holly as she’s laid down. The voices of Mama and the Neighbours are muddled around her.
NEIGHBOURS (OP):
...still awake?... want to thank her... stop the bleeding... sheets are soaked already... more blankets, he’s freezing... What’s that noise?... Oh, God... my God, not now...
HOLLY (weak):
Turn down the volume, ‘kay?... Just need a nap...
SFX:
rrrrrRR
PAGE SEVENTEEN (eight panels)
Panel 1. Close on Amala, her eyes downcast, mirroring the last panel with Holly. Her face is tearstained.
AMALA:
I think I should go...
Panel 2. Amala starts towards the bright opening of the rough and narrow cave she’s hiding in with Hassan. He tries to hold her back.
AMALA:
I shouldn’t be here...
HASSAN:
No, you’re not thinking straight. We’re safe here--
ALVIS (OP):
AMALA!
Panel 3. Hassan cowers from Alvis, while Amala just looks at her curiously. Alvis seems to be having trouble getting her words out.
HASSAN:
GAH!
AMALA:
Al?
ALVIS:
Amal-la-hur-hur-Hol-l-ly-a-a-a-Zaki-hur--
Panel 4. As before: Amala and Alvis, Hassan in the background. Amala is now alarmed. Alvis seems to be fainter than before.
AMALA:
You mean Zaki? Zaki’s hurt?
ALVIS (small):
Hurry-Ho-ol-l--
Panel 5. To Amala’s shock, Alvis just disappears.
SFX:
Shp!
Panel 6. Hassan is concerned, not only because of the strange talking light, but also because Amala has just dashed out of the cave. Hassan’s head is turned towards the cave’s exit, through which we can see Holly running down the hill.
HASSAN:
Amala, what was tha-- Amala?
Panel 7. Amala is running, nearing the concrete wall.
CAP/AMALA:
"I need to be home, that’s where they are, I know it..."
Panel 8. Fear plain on her face, Amala runs past the end of the wall, into the village, towards the growing rumbling sound and billowing clouds of gray dust.
CAP/AMALA:
"Already I know, they’re all there..."
SFX:
RRRRRR
PAGES EIGHTEEN AND NINETEEN (five panels)
SPLASH
The top two-thirds of the pages are taken up by clouds of dust, rubble, and bulldozers; by expressionless soldiers supervising calmly, and by neighbours looking on with tears in their eyes. Half a wall is all that’s left standing of Amala’s home and it too will soon fall. One old neighbour is looking straight at the reader - at Amala - sad and afraid.
CAP/AMALA:
"...at home."
There are four panels along the bottom, two on each page. With each panel Amala appears to be drained of more and more colour.
Panel 2. Amala at a distance, stalk-still and staring at the destruction.
CAP/AMALA:
"They did everything they could..."
CAP/AMALA:
"but they were too late to help Zaki -- he had been shot for throwing stones at a tank, and so had Holly, for trying to save him..."
Panel 3. Distraught, she rushes forward, but is held back by numerous arms.
CAP/AMALA:
"He had just died when the soldiers arrived and ordered everyone to leave the house. Mama refused. Afraid they would take him from her, she didn’t let anyone move Zaki, and couldn’t be made to leave him there alone..."
Panel 4. Close on Amala, still being held back, though she’s stopped struggling. Her head is bowed in mourning.
CAP/AMALA:
"They were telling the soldiers about her, and about the girl who was also inside, who was badly injured and shouldn’t be moved, but before they finished they had blown up my house..."
Panel 5. Amala walks away from the scene, head bowed, bathed in a red wash from the light of an ambulance just arriving.
CAP/AMALA:
"After, the soldiers told them that we had been hiding something -- insurgents or weapons or something -- and they weren’t to allow time for anything to be smuggled out..."
CAP/AMALA:
"There was nothing they could have done."
PAGE TWENTY (five panels)
The sun is setting and with each subsequent panel it gradually colours the world deep red.
Panel 1. Amala stands alone, apart from everything around her. A small group of soldiers talk and laugh together as they walk by. They don’t notice her watching them with a cold stare.
CAP/AMALA:
"I was different, special..."
CAP/AMALA:
"A slayer..."
Panel 2. Amala stalks the soldiers at a distance, blending into the monochrome world around her, just one more blank face out of many.
CAP/AMALA:
"And they made me just like everybody else..."
Panel 3. At the edge of town, Amala hides in the shadows between buildings and from her point of view we see the soldiers entering an army compound through a gate in a chain-link fence topped with barbed wire. They are silhouetted by the setting sun.
Panel 4. Close on Amala in the alley, cast in shadow, her face still blank.
CAP/AMALA:
"I have nothing..."
Panel 5. Long shot: Behind the fence the soldiers scatter as the shadow of a girl leaps down from the sky and into their midst.
CAP/AMALA:
"Except the power..."
PAGE TWENTY-ONE (five panels)
Panel 1. Played out in silhouettes, Amala snaps the neck of one soldier as another rushes at her to club her with his gun.
CAP/AMALA:
"The power to kill..."
Panel 2. Amala casts the dead soldier aside and grabs the butt of the other soldier’s rifle as he brings it down on her. Others are taking aim at her.
Panel 3. Amala swings the soldier in front of her, using him to shield herself from the others’ fire.
Panel 4. Amala drops the second dead soldier as she herself is shot.
Panel 5. Close on Amala, lying on the ground in the last faint rays of sunlight, her eyes open but blank. A soldier standing over her takes aim at her head.
CAP/AMALA:
"...and to choose how I die."
PAGE TWENTY-TWO (one panel)
Panel 1. Low angle: The bulldozers have stopped clearing away the last evidence of Amala’s life for now. They stand dormant besides the piles of rubble. By the gray moonlight we can just make out the crucifix protruding from under a block of concrete, Holly’s newspaper crushed into a caterpillar track, and nearby on the ground, Zaki’s toy truck, bent and broken.
CAP/AMALA:
"Maybe you blame me, and maybe you’re right to..."
CAP/AMALA:
"...but I hope you understand."
END
(If you do read this, comments and concrit would, of course, be appreciated)
I was quite disappointed as the story was important to me and I had worked long and hard on it. It represents weeks of research and feverish writing and rewriting. I've been hanging on to it for a year and a half, with some vague hope that another way of submitting it to Joss & Co. would present itself. But I've come to accept reality now, and so I am posting it here on lj.
I don't imagine many will read it, seeing as I have been so sporadic in my posting, and a hundred times worse when it comes to commenting on my Flist. Also, this story does not involve any of the BtVS characters everyone knows and loves, but a cast of entirely original characters. I love them, though, and I hope that anyone who reads this will as well.
Part of the premise is that, aside from the TV ads, the Scoobies have other ways of tracking down slayers as well. More time-intensive ways, but they are what's needed for finding slayers is certain parts of the world.
The main idea, however, builds on the theme of slayerhood as empowerment.
This is the story of Amala, a Palestinian Christian, and a slayer living in a society where every form of power is denied her...
"CAP" indicates a caption
"SFX" indicates sound effects
"OP" stands for "off panel"
PAGE ONE (one panel)
Panel 1. The bright Middle-Eastern sun is bearing down on a barren slope covered in rocks and rubble. It’s a bleak world, almost monochromatic; even the people appear to be washed out by the sun, drained of life and colour. There are three boys, all around 10 years old. The smallest boys is named Zaki, the biggest is Jamar. The middle boy is inconsequential - just there for the sake of symmetry. We see the boys from a low angle, as if we were peeking at them over the dead, bloodied body they are staring at.
CAP/AMALA:
"A lot of bad things happen here, but no one really talks about it..."
PAGE TWO (seven panels)
Panel 1. The hill from a distance, surmounted by a neat and shiny new community, while a village of very old, small houses lies at its feet. Some of the houses have been reduced to rubble - there’s a bulldozer in the foreground clearing some of it away. A wall made of 20-foot high slabs of concrete is in the process of being constructed around the hill. Its wending path will have to veer again to go around, rather than through, the edge of town. The boys are running downhill as fast as they can.
CAP/AMALA:
"We’re different that way. Do you know what I mean? It’s important you understand."
Panel 2. A family stares with blank faces at the pile of rubble that had once been their home. In the background a teenage girl with long black hair and her mother look on in sympathy as they walk up the sloping street. The teenager is Amala and she’s not like everyone else; she has colour, vibrancy. Her mother (hereafter referred to as Mama) is just as bleak as everyone else.
MAMA:
That’s what awaits us --
AMALA:
Mama, don’t --
Panel 3. Mama and Amala have stopped at the arched door of a house at the very base of the hill and Mama is fishing through her bag. We’re close enough to see that Amala is wearing a cross around her neck.
MAMA:
I’m sorry Amala. I wish I could promise you a future --
AMALA:
You don’t have to promise me anything, mama. Just don’t talk like that.
MAMA:
It’s hard not to when I look around at the world...
Panel 4. Having found her keys, Mama starts to open the door. Amala is smiling at her, trying to cheer her up.
MAMA:
And I had another dream last night --
AMALA:
Me too. I was playing with a yo-yo in a graveyard. Dreams don’t really mean any--
Panel 5. From the inside of the house, we see Amala and Mama framed in the doorway, over which an icon hangs. Amala already running forward, and both of them are distressed by the sight of Zaki sitting on the ground and crying.
AMALA:
Zaki!
Panel 6. Amala kneeling by Zaki’s side, on the floor by a small Orthodox shrine. Zaki's eyes are downcast, looking at a toy truck he’s holding in his lap.
ZAKI:
W-we found a-a... on the hill... it was Mr. Hossein... I-I think...
Panel 7. Amala embraces Zaki.
CAP/HOLLY:
"Like there’s not enough bad in the world already! I just can’t understand it --"
PAGE THREE (seven panels)
Panel 1. Close on a newspaper headline. Something about a bombing. The speech bubbles of Alvis should be unique. Maybe pink.
ALVIS (OP):
Translation charm wearing off?
HOLLY (OP, whisper):
No, I mean I don’t understand why --
ALVIS (OP):
Traffic jams...
Panel 2. Holly - a blonde, pigtailed, freckled, all-American teenager (more colourful than the natives) - sitting in the backseat of a taxicab, reading the newspaper which, now that we’re not sharing her point of view, is in Hebrew. The voice of this Alvis person seems to be coming from inside her.
ALVIS:
...They piss everybody off.
HOLLY (whisper):
Very not funny, Alvis.
Panel 3. The cabbie looks at Holly in his rear-view mirror.
CABBIE:
Did you say something, miss?
HOLLY:
Oh. Uh, well... I was just wondering...
Panel 4. Exterior shot, high and wide: the cab is stuck in gridlock. The main hold-up is a military checkpoint that they have yet to reach. A helicopter hovers overhead.
HOLLY:
Are we there yet?
Panel 5. Amala pulls on her jacket and heads for the door while Mama frets over Zaki.
AMALA:
I need to hurry.
MAMA:
But how do you expect to help him? You can’t change anything.
AMALA:
But maybe I can.
CAP/AMALA
"I know I can..."
Panel 6. Mama sees Amala off as she heads down the busy but dismal street lined with blank faces.
MAMA:
Be back before dark!
CAP/AMALA:
"I know because I’m not like everybody else. Since last year I’ve had this power..."
Panel 7. Low angle. Amala stops short as she comes up against someone who’s casting a big shadow. All we can really see of him is one thick arm holding a plank of wood like a club. His name is Shamar.
CAP/AMALA:
"I’ve had hope."
PAGE FOUR (seven panels)
Panel 1. Amala stands firm, braced for a fight.
SHAMAR (OP):
Get out of my way, Amala.
AMALA:
I only want to help you Shamar.
Panel 2. On Shamar. A young man about Amala’s age, he looks like a cross between a gorilla and a brick wall. Jamar and a woman with a tear-stained face wearing a hijab stand behind him, looking anxious.
SHAMAR:
You can do that by helping me avenge my father... Or by getting out of my way.
Panel 3. Holly’s on a street corner now, still holding her newspaper, the taxi driving away behind her. Farther away, across the street, Amala and Shamar are arguing. Holly looks apprehensively over her shoulder at a tank trundling down the road. Alvis’ voice still seems to be coming from inside her.
HOLLY:
Let’s hurry up with this one, Alvis. I don’t feel safe here.
ALVIS:
Yeah, sure. Whenever you’re ready.
Panel 4. Close on Holly unzipping her jacket. Something flies out of it and off panel, leaving a pink trail of light.
HOLLY:
Oh yeah, sorry.
ALVIS (OP):
Finally! Air! Hygiene tip here: Secret’s strong enough for a man but not for a slayer.
HOLLY:
Like you even have a nose. Just find her.
ALVIS (OP):
Not even a "please?" What am I...
Panel 5. Close on Alvis - a little glowy ball of pink light hovering in mid-air. (Note: Alvis is referred to with the feminine pronoun even though, being a ball of light, she’s technically asexual)
ALVIS:
...your personal guide, conjured from the ether by your demi-goddess boss, magically bequeathed with the knowledge to conveniently answer your every need and tied to your very soul so that I am bound to serve you?
Panel 6. Holly rolls her eyes at Alvis. Behind her, Shamar is trying to get past Amala.
HOLLY:
Uh, yeah.
ALVIS:
Well, I brought you this far, you can do the rest yourself.
Panel 7. Inset panel, close on Alvis, Holly’s rolled-up newspaper raised threateningly over her.
HOLLY (OP):
I’ll swat you.
ALVIS:
She’s right behind you.
PAGE FIVE (seven panels)
Panel 1. Holly turns around in time to see Amala sock Shamar in the jaw, making him fall down.
HOLLY:
Hm. Guess I could have spotted that one on my own.
ALVIS:
Told you so. I’m not called "all-knowing" for nothing. Let’s go --
HOLLY:
Or not. We’ll wait ‘til she’s alone. Unless you want another scene like Ternopyl...
Panel 2. Now on the ground, Shamar glares up at Amala.
SHAMAR:
Just let me go, Amala!
AMALA:
No! They’ll kill you!
SHAMAR:
I don’t care!
Panel 3. Amala looks hurt. Shamar’s mother and brother hang back behind her.
AMALA:
But I do. We all care about you... Think of what you have to live for, Shamar...
Panel 4. Close on Shamar. Amala is finally getting through to him and he looks a little ashamed of himself.
AMALA (OP):
Think of us.
SHAMAR:
I’m sorry.
Panel 5. Close on Shamar and Amala’s hands reaching towards each other so she can help him up.
SHAMAR (OP):
You’re my best friend, Amala.
Panel 6. Shamar and Amala side by side, still holding hands. Though he’s calmed down, Shamar still looks nearly mutinous. Amala stands close to him so she can whisper.
SHAMAR:
I just need to do something.
AMALA (whisper):
Come to my class with me.
SHAMAR:
I said I need to do something.
AMALA (whisper):
It will make you feel better, I promise...
Panel 7. The faces of about 5 young people arranged in two rows, listening attentively.
CAP/AMALA:
"...it makes you feel connected, powerful."
TEACHER (OP):
"...pray to God that he will send someone to redeem them from this ill treatment and from the insults of the barbarians...
PAGE SIX (six panels)
Panel 1. A benevolent-looking old man reads to about 10 students from The Prince. Some of the students have to sit on the floor as they’re in someone’s kitchen and there aren’t enough chairs. Amala and Shamar are at the back of the group.
TEACHER:
"One can see every Italian is ready, everyone is eager to rally to the colours, if only someone will raise them high..." And that’s all we have time for. We’ll finish chapter 26 and have a discussion about Machiavelli’s ideas next class.
Panel 2. Shamar and Amala start to follow the other students to the backdoor. They don’t notice the shifty-looking student just in front of them seems to be listening in on what they’re saying.
SHAMAR:
It’s just talk.
AMALA:
No, it’s more...
Panel 3. On Amala talking to Shamar. The shifty-looking student is just ducking out the door.
AMALA:
...they tried to stop us going to the university, but we learn anyways. This is resistance, this is power.
Panel 4. Shamar and Amala step out the door and into a back-alley. It’s different from the Sunnydale back-alleys - it curves, it’s narrower, and the backs of the buildings are staggered instead of lined up straight and neat. But, as in Sunnydale, it’s inevitably dark - the sun is low in the sky now and the buildings are casting long shadows.
SHAMAR:
But it doesn’t change anything --
HASSAN (OP):
Hey...
Panel 5. Amala and Shamar turn to see Hassan (the shifty student) approaching them. Amala regards him suspiciously.
AMALA:
Hassan?
HASSAN (whisper):
Do you want to do more than just talk?
AMALA:
Like what?
Panel 6. We see the three students talking in a tight circle - Hassan looking up at Shamar - as if spying at them from around the corner.
HASSAN (whisper):
Some of us are trying to organize a resistance. There’s a meeting tonight, if you’re interested.
PAGE SEVEN (eight panels)
Panel 1. On Hassan, turned towards Amala now.
SHAMAR (OP):
I’ll come.
AMALA (OP):
No, Shamar...
HASSAN:
You’re welcome too, Amala. We know you can fight like a man.
Panel 2. Hassan seems peeved that Amala ignores him. She’s looking beseechingly at Shamar, who’s getting frustrated by all the inaction.
SHAMAR:
I thought you wanted a resistance?
AMALA:
Not this kind. It’s been tried before. You’re just going to get people killed.
SHAMAR:
Doing nothing gets people killed too.
Panel 3. Amala’s been stung and she looks it. Shamar looks back at her almost apologetically as he follows Hassan into the shadows.
HASSAN:
Goodbye Amala.
AMALA (small):
I have to get home before dark anyhow.
Panel 4. Amala, head bowed, walks out of the alley and onto the twilit street. The green doors and shutters of the shops are already closed and locked.
Panel 5. Amala in profile. She’s stopped in her tracks, head up and eyes wide. There does appear to be the long shadow of a person creeping up behind her.
Panel 6. Amala glances over her shoulder, but the shadow is gone.
Panel 7. She turns back and is surprised to see Holly standing in front of her and smiling in her face.
HOLLY:
Hi!
AMALA:
AHH!
Panel 8. Amala acts reflexively and punches Holly in the nose.
SFX:
WHOP!
PAGE EIGHT (nine panels)
Panel 1. Holly grimaces and holds her nose in pain. Amala keeps her fists raised and eyes Alvis suspiciously.
HOLLY:
Ow! Okay, definitely a slayer.
AMALA:
What? Who are you?
HOLLY:
My name’s Holly...
Panel 2. Close on Amala, intrigued by what Holly goes on to say.
HOLLY (OP):
And I’m like you. You’re different from other people, right? Special. We both are...
Panel 3. Close on Holly, a smile on her face (she likes this part).
HOLLY
We’re slayers. We have power, and a destiny to serve the forces of goo-
Panel 4. Holly is suddenly indignant - Amala is walking away from her.
HOLLY:
Hey! Where do you think you’re going?
AMALA:
I want to hear what you have to say, but we have to get inside now.
Panel 5. Extreme low angle of Holly as she catches up to Amala. Above her, a drone aircraft buzzes through the sky.
HOLLY:
What’s the rush?
AMALA (OP):
Bad things happen at night.
Panel 6. Bird’s-eye-view of the edge of town. Two teensy girls are approaching a teensy woman standing outside a teensy house near the 20-foot wall at the edge of town.
AMALA:
Bad things happen during the day too, but they’re worse at night.
MAMA:
At last you’re home! I was getting worried!
Panel 7. Mama lets the two girls and Alvis into the house. She is, of course, curious about Holly, who is all smiles and politeness. Zaki, meanwhile, is staring at Alvis.
MAMA:
Who’s this?
AMALA:
Mama, Zaki, this is Holly. She’s like me.
Panel 8. Zaki points at Alvis, who is hovering over Holly’s shoulder.
ZAKI:
What’s that?
ALVIS:
Call me Al.
HOLLY:
Spirit guide, magically bequeathed with knowledge, bound to my soul so she won’t go running off --
ALVIS:
Which I would ne-
HOLLY:
Yeah. Uh huh. Anyhoo...
Panel 9. Holly turns to Amala.
HOLLY:
I’ve got a lot to tell you...
PAGE NINE (four panels)
Panel 1. Holly and Amala seated across from each other at the table in the middle of the room. Zaki is between them and is looking up at Holly like she’s his new hero. Holly is talking away, and apparently has been for a while; Mama is clearing away the used dishes, but leaves Holly’s newspaper on the table besides her. Amala is practically glowing with excitement.
CAP/AMALA:
"Holly told me about everything. She told me about slayers, about the history, the heritage, the organization, the power..."
CAP/AMALA:
"The power to change the world..."
CAP/AMALA:
"It was everything I had been hoping for."
Panel 2. Zaki goggling at Holly, who smiles back.
ZAKI:
So you fight real monsters?
HOLLY:
Monsters and other evils of all shapes and sizes...
Panel 3. Holly turns to an eager Amala. So does Zaki, looking absolutely thrilled.
HOLLY:
You going to join us?
AMALA:
What do I have to do?
HOLLY:
Just have your things packed by tomorrow and be ready to fly to Rome.
Panel 4. Close on Amala, the picture of disappointment.
AMALA:
I have to leave?
HOLLY (OP):
You have to be trained. The team in Rome’s the clos--
PAGE TEN (eight panels)
Panel 1. Holly bemusedly watches Amala rise from the table and turn away.
AMALA:
I can’t go.
HOLLY:
You can come back.
ALVIS:
Not really.
Panel 2. On Alvis
HOLLY (OP):
Alvis! We don’t force anyone to--
ALVIS:
But you train them to fight demons. There aren’t any demons here...
Panel 3. Close on Holly. She wasn’t expecting that.
ALVIS:
...According to our sources they all left years ago.
HOLLY:
Oh. Um, well, I’m sure they could post her somewhere near--
AMALA (OP):
You don’t understand.
Panel 4. Holly turns to Amala, who is standing by the shrine with her back to everyone.
HOLLY:
Huh?
AMALA:
Bad things happen here all the time. People die...
Panel 5. Holly glances at Zaki, who is staring blankly at the table.
AMALA:
You learn very young here that your life is worth nothing. You have no hope for your future...
Panel 6. On Amala, still turned away from everyone else. Her eyes are cast downwards at Zaki’s truck, which she’s holding in her hands. We can see Holly in the background, watching her.
AMALA:
When I changed it was the first time I felt maybe I had a purpose, a future, the first time I felt alive...
HOLLY:
Then don’t you want to leave?
Panel 7. Amala turns to Holly, indignant. The crucifix hangs on the wall behind her.
AMALA:
Leave my people for dead? My family has lived in this land for 2000 years, I’m not going to give it up. I want to fight evil here!
Panel 8. Agitated, Holly rises from the table.
HOLLY:
Okay, this is human evil you’re talking about. We only deal with demon evil.
PAGE ELEVEN (seven panels)
Panel 1. One big panel would show Amala and Holly facing off from opposite sides of the room, Zaki still sitting at the table between them, but that panel is sliced in two. This half just shows Amala, arms are crossed and glaring, but not in an angry or self-righteous way. She’s disappointed, disillusioned and frustrated.
AMALA:
You mean you only deal with evil that affects you.
HOLLY(OP):
Hey--
AMALA:
Does anyone know what it’s like here where you come from?
HOLLY(OP):
Well, it’s not like people really talk about it.
Panel 2. The other half has Holly standing back from the table, her hands raised defensively. Zaki looks up at her uncertainly.
AMALA (OP):
Because you don’t care.
HOLLY:
No--
ZAKI:
You aren’t going to help us?
HOLLY:
It’s not like I don’t want to--
Panel 3. On Holly, at a total loss.
AMALA (OP):
Then what are you going to do?
HOLLY:
I- I’ll come back tomorrow.
Panel 4. Holly heads for the door, looking over her shoulder, not quite able to meet Amala’s eyes.
HOLLY:
We should both think about what each other has said, and we’ll come to a decision tomorrow.
MAMA (OP):
Wait!
Panel 4. Holly’s point of view: Mama pulling a string over the table (where Zaki is still sitting) to turn out the lights. She’s expressionless, not looking at Holly.
SFX (small):
Click.
MAMA:
Hide Al before you go.
Panel 5. Zaki’s head is bowed in disappointment. Holly holds her jacket so that Alvis, now the only source of light in the room, can fly inside.
HOLLY:
Um... okay.
MAMA:
Only, the settlers on the hill shoot at any light they see down here.
Panel 6. A faint pink glow from Holly’s chest is all the light we have to see by, but it’s enough that we can see her eyes are wide; she’s taken aback by what Mama just told her. Zaki’s expression has also changed; he now has the same mutinous look Shamar wore earlier.
HOLLY:
Why?
ZAKI (small):
Because no one stops them.
PAGE TWELVE (seven panels)
Panel 1. The village in the early morning. The faces of all the buildings are dark, backlit by the sunrise. A black bulldozer framed with red light dominates the foreground.
CAP/ALVIS:
"So it doesn’t matter--"
CAP/HOLLY:
"I didn’t say that..."
Panel 2. High and wide: the road into town. Holly and Alvis’ taxi is once again stuck in gridlock. A helicopter hovers overhead.
HOLLY (whispered):
"I said there’s a difference between humans and demons..."
Panel 3. Zaki climbs the rocky hill, approaching his two friends, who seem to be scrounging around for something.
CAP/HOLLY:
"The difference being that human problems aren’t mine."
CAP/AMALA’S CLASS NOTES:
"They pray to God that he will send someone to redeem them from this ill treatment..."
CAP/HOLLY:
"They can take care of themselves..."
Panel 4. Amala sitting at the table at home and going over her class notes. Behind her, Mama is doing the dishes.
CAP/HOLLY:
"That’s what I should tell Amala, anyways."
CAP/AMALA’S CLASS NOTES:
"...One can see that everyone is ready..."
MAMA:
I had a dream last night...
Panel 5. Close on Mama’s troubled face.
MAMA:
The entire town was dead...
Panel 6. Jamar and his friend collecting rocks. Zaki watches them from a distance.
CAP/MAMA:
"...They had all been turned into vampires."
JAMAR:
One stone for each of us they’ve killed. Look for sharp ones. It’s our turn to make them bleed.
ZAKI:
Hey...
CAP/AMALA’S CLASS NOTES:
"Everyone is eager to rally to the colours..."
Panel 7. On Jamar as Zaki comes up to him.
CAP/AMALA’S CLASS NOTES:
"...if only someone will raise them high."
ZAKI
Can I help?
CAP/HOLLY:
"That’s not right..."
PAGE THIRTEEN (seven panels)
Panel 1. An ambulance has been stopped at the checkpoint. Some of the soldiers are looking curiously in the back at the person on the stretcher covered in bloodied bandages.
HOLLY (OP):
...They’ve pulled over an ambulance. Can they do that?
CABBIE (OP):
They do that all the time, miss.
HOLLY (OP):
Why?
Panel 2. On Holly, leaning out the cab window and frowning indignantly.
CABBIE (OP):
When you live here you learn to stop asking questions.
Panel 3. Close on the handle of the cab door, Holly’s hand about to pull on it.
HOLLY (OP):
Someone should stop them.
ALVIS (OP, whispered):
Holly! Don’t be stupid!
Panel 4. Exterior. A soldier with a very large gun casts a suspicious glance at the cab in the background.
ALVIS (whispered):
Slayer strength isn’t much good against bullets!
Panel 5. Close on Holly, looking out the window. She looks pained.
HOLLY (whispered):
But I want to help them.
9/ALVIS (whispered)
It doesn’t matter anyways...
Panel 6. Back to Mama and Amala, the latter still ostensibly concentrating on her notes.
CAP/ALVIS:
"...Not now. They’re already dead."
MAMA:
I know you think dreams are silly--
AMALA:
I don’t think anything of them at all. They mean nothing--
HASSAN (OP):
AMALA!
Panel 7. Amala and Mama turn to see Hassan at the door, gasping for breath.
HASSAN:
They’re making arrests!
PAGE FOURTEEN (six panels)
Panel 1. Amala twists around in her chair to face Hassan properly, while he rushes forwards and grabs her hand. Mama stands by helplessly.
AMALA:
You need to hide?
HASSAN:
We both do. They got the professor this morning --
AMALA:
They’re arresting our class?
MAMA:
But you didn’t do anything wrong!
Panel 2. Amala trips as Hassan pulls her from her chair and towards the door.
HASSAN:
And they got Shamar last night --
AMALA:
Shamar? What happened?
HASSAN:
He put up a fight and they killed him.
Panel 3. Amala lets Hassan pull her out the door.
HASSAN:
Come on, we have to go!
Panel 4. Extreme long shot, high angle: A small ridge, its side covered in brush. A street climbs up a shallow incline from level ground and runs along the ridge’s edge. Holly walks up the street, Alvis at her side. To her left is the village, to her right, a drop - steep, but not scary. After the street plateaus another connects with it at an almost perpendicular angle. Unseen by Holly, a tank lumbers down this second street, towards the intersection on the ridge. Avoiding all roads, but taking a path between buildings that parallels the tank’s, Zaki, Jamar and their friend clamber down towards the ridge’s edge, each of them carrying some rocks, and start running towards where they know the tank will be, to face it head-on.
HOLLY:
What do you mean there’s nothing I can do?
ALVIS:
It’s too big an issue, you haven’t got the kind of power to--
HOLLY:
Hey...
Panel 5. Over Holly as she comes to the top of the incline. There are three boy throwing stones at something out of sight.
HOLLY:
Isn’t that Zaki? What’s he--
Panel 6. Close on Holly, her eyes wide with alarm, watching the tank fire on the boys off panel.
SFX:
CHAK-A-CHAK-A-CHAK-A-CHAK-A!
PAGE FIFTEEN (five panels)
Panel 1. At the sound of gunfire the few people who were outside scatter to take cover, but Holly bolts forward, Alvis just behind her, towards the three boys lying in their blood on the street.
HOLLY:
Zaki!
Panel 2. Eye-level with the barrel of the tank’s gun, facing it straight-on. A soldier is sitting atop the tank, and fires at Holly as she runs past, but she’s already out of danger - the tank has not reached the intersection yet and the buildings on either side of it act as blinkers.
SFX:
CHAK-A-CHAK-A-CHAK!
Panel 3. Holly barely stops running as she scoops Zaki up.
HOLLY:
We’ll get you safe and then come back for your friends, ‘kay?
ZAKI (weak):
Owww...
Panel 4. Over the shoulder of the tank’s gunner as they come around the corner. He takes aim at the blonde girl running away from him down the street with a boy slung over her shoulder. She’s not far, but has almost reached the corner.
Panel 5. Holly lurches forward as she’s hit in the back. A rubber bullet, about two inches long and an inch in diameter, comes out her front in a spray of blood.
SFX:
CHAK-A-CHAK!
ALVIS:
HOLLY!
HOLLY:
Unh
PAGE SIXTEEN (eight panels)
Panel one: Holly has fallen out of sight, but Alvis hovers over her.
ALVIS:
Holly?
HOLLY (OP, weak)
Ow...
Panel 2. Low angle, Holly is struggling to get up, Zaki still on her back, having fallen over the ridge. Alvis zips off panel, pink light trailing behind her.
HOLLY:
Al, go get Amala, ‘kay?
ALVIS (OP):
On it!
HOLLY (weak):
I think I’m going to need the help.
Panel 3. Long shot: Holly carries a limp Zaki in her arms. Her eyes are half-closed; she looks exhausted.
NEIGHBOUR 1 (OP):
Oh my God!
MAMA (OP):
ZAKI!
Panel 4. Zaki’s mother takes him from Holly’s arms. Grandmotherly Neighbour 1 hurries away to call for help, while Neighbours 2 and 3 (a woman Mama’s age, about 5’ in height, and a tall, thin man with graying hair, respectively) rush forward to see what’s happening and to help. Holly leaves a trail of blood in her path. She is, understandably, is kind of out of it.
MAMA:
Zaki! My baby!
ZAKI (weak):
Mama...
HOLLY:
He was throwing stones, but, y’know, bullets hurt a lot more...
NEIGHBOUR 1:
I’ll go call an ambulance.
Panel 5. Holly smiles hazily, her arms hanging limp at her sides. Neighbour 2 stands nearby, anxiously eying the extensive bloodstains on Holly’s shirt.
NEIGHBOUR (small):
You’re hurt too...
HOLLY:
‘Snothing... "Slayer strength no good against bullets"... Ha!
Panel 6. Holly faints. An alarmed Neighbour 2 catches her.
NEIGHBOUR 2:
Uh... Help!
Panel 7. Long shot: Neighbour 3 helps Neighbour 2 carry Holly inside the house.
NEIGHBOUR 2:
She’s lost a lot of blood. I’m surprised she made it this far.
NEIGHBOUR 3:
Let’s just get her inside now and be surprised later.
HOLLY (weakly):
I’m okay... happy to help...
Panel 8. Close on Holly as she’s laid down. The voices of Mama and the Neighbours are muddled around her.
NEIGHBOURS (OP):
...still awake?... want to thank her... stop the bleeding... sheets are soaked already... more blankets, he’s freezing... What’s that noise?... Oh, God... my God, not now...
HOLLY (weak):
Turn down the volume, ‘kay?... Just need a nap...
SFX:
rrrrrRR
PAGE SEVENTEEN (eight panels)
Panel 1. Close on Amala, her eyes downcast, mirroring the last panel with Holly. Her face is tearstained.
AMALA:
I think I should go...
Panel 2. Amala starts towards the bright opening of the rough and narrow cave she’s hiding in with Hassan. He tries to hold her back.
AMALA:
I shouldn’t be here...
HASSAN:
No, you’re not thinking straight. We’re safe here--
ALVIS (OP):
AMALA!
Panel 3. Hassan cowers from Alvis, while Amala just looks at her curiously. Alvis seems to be having trouble getting her words out.
HASSAN:
GAH!
AMALA:
Al?
ALVIS:
Amal-la-hur-hur-Hol-l-ly-a-a-a-Zaki-hur--
Panel 4. As before: Amala and Alvis, Hassan in the background. Amala is now alarmed. Alvis seems to be fainter than before.
AMALA:
You mean Zaki? Zaki’s hurt?
ALVIS (small):
Hurry-Ho-ol-l--
Panel 5. To Amala’s shock, Alvis just disappears.
SFX:
Shp!
Panel 6. Hassan is concerned, not only because of the strange talking light, but also because Amala has just dashed out of the cave. Hassan’s head is turned towards the cave’s exit, through which we can see Holly running down the hill.
HASSAN:
Amala, what was tha-- Amala?
Panel 7. Amala is running, nearing the concrete wall.
CAP/AMALA:
"I need to be home, that’s where they are, I know it..."
Panel 8. Fear plain on her face, Amala runs past the end of the wall, into the village, towards the growing rumbling sound and billowing clouds of gray dust.
CAP/AMALA:
"Already I know, they’re all there..."
SFX:
RRRRRR
PAGES EIGHTEEN AND NINETEEN (five panels)
SPLASH
The top two-thirds of the pages are taken up by clouds of dust, rubble, and bulldozers; by expressionless soldiers supervising calmly, and by neighbours looking on with tears in their eyes. Half a wall is all that’s left standing of Amala’s home and it too will soon fall. One old neighbour is looking straight at the reader - at Amala - sad and afraid.
CAP/AMALA:
"...at home."
There are four panels along the bottom, two on each page. With each panel Amala appears to be drained of more and more colour.
Panel 2. Amala at a distance, stalk-still and staring at the destruction.
CAP/AMALA:
"They did everything they could..."
CAP/AMALA:
"but they were too late to help Zaki -- he had been shot for throwing stones at a tank, and so had Holly, for trying to save him..."
Panel 3. Distraught, she rushes forward, but is held back by numerous arms.
CAP/AMALA:
"He had just died when the soldiers arrived and ordered everyone to leave the house. Mama refused. Afraid they would take him from her, she didn’t let anyone move Zaki, and couldn’t be made to leave him there alone..."
Panel 4. Close on Amala, still being held back, though she’s stopped struggling. Her head is bowed in mourning.
CAP/AMALA:
"They were telling the soldiers about her, and about the girl who was also inside, who was badly injured and shouldn’t be moved, but before they finished they had blown up my house..."
Panel 5. Amala walks away from the scene, head bowed, bathed in a red wash from the light of an ambulance just arriving.
CAP/AMALA:
"After, the soldiers told them that we had been hiding something -- insurgents or weapons or something -- and they weren’t to allow time for anything to be smuggled out..."
CAP/AMALA:
"There was nothing they could have done."
PAGE TWENTY (five panels)
The sun is setting and with each subsequent panel it gradually colours the world deep red.
Panel 1. Amala stands alone, apart from everything around her. A small group of soldiers talk and laugh together as they walk by. They don’t notice her watching them with a cold stare.
CAP/AMALA:
"I was different, special..."
CAP/AMALA:
"A slayer..."
Panel 2. Amala stalks the soldiers at a distance, blending into the monochrome world around her, just one more blank face out of many.
CAP/AMALA:
"And they made me just like everybody else..."
Panel 3. At the edge of town, Amala hides in the shadows between buildings and from her point of view we see the soldiers entering an army compound through a gate in a chain-link fence topped with barbed wire. They are silhouetted by the setting sun.
Panel 4. Close on Amala in the alley, cast in shadow, her face still blank.
CAP/AMALA:
"I have nothing..."
Panel 5. Long shot: Behind the fence the soldiers scatter as the shadow of a girl leaps down from the sky and into their midst.
CAP/AMALA:
"Except the power..."
PAGE TWENTY-ONE (five panels)
Panel 1. Played out in silhouettes, Amala snaps the neck of one soldier as another rushes at her to club her with his gun.
CAP/AMALA:
"The power to kill..."
Panel 2. Amala casts the dead soldier aside and grabs the butt of the other soldier’s rifle as he brings it down on her. Others are taking aim at her.
Panel 3. Amala swings the soldier in front of her, using him to shield herself from the others’ fire.
Panel 4. Amala drops the second dead soldier as she herself is shot.
Panel 5. Close on Amala, lying on the ground in the last faint rays of sunlight, her eyes open but blank. A soldier standing over her takes aim at her head.
CAP/AMALA:
"...and to choose how I die."
PAGE TWENTY-TWO (one panel)
Panel 1. Low angle: The bulldozers have stopped clearing away the last evidence of Amala’s life for now. They stand dormant besides the piles of rubble. By the gray moonlight we can just make out the crucifix protruding from under a block of concrete, Holly’s newspaper crushed into a caterpillar track, and nearby on the ground, Zaki’s toy truck, bent and broken.
CAP/AMALA:
"Maybe you blame me, and maybe you’re right to..."
CAP/AMALA:
"...but I hope you understand."
END
(If you do read this, comments and concrit would, of course, be appreciated)