A letter to Mama Welch

[lorelaiautumn]

Dear Dad-Mom,

I hope you're having fun wherever it is you are. I'm glad you got to take a vacation (running an inventor's guild looks like such a pain), but Mom and I both miss you a lot. How soon are you coming home? Could you please come back as soon as you can and stop Mom from irritating me so fucking much?

Love you lots,
Lorelai

Comments

[alchemist_eliza]

Very funny.

[lorelaiautumn]

Mom, you know I love you very much. But you haven't stopped harping on me about anything since Dad-Mom went away.

>=(

[alchemist_eliza]

How can I "harp on you" when I barely even see you?

Re: >=(

[lorelaiautumn]

And every time we do see each other, it's either, "Don't do this", "Go do that", "I'll ground you if you say that again" (that time by the way was a personal opinion), day after day. I never even got Dad-Mom a present because you were too busy moping around or yelling at somebody to do so.

[alchemist_eliza]

If that opinion was so personal, why didn't you just keep it that way?

[lorelaiautumn]

What, so you can call somebody a wanker to their face, but I can't say anything about you? I just said something about you being so nosy. People here have said worse than that. Hell, YOU have said worse than that!

[alchemist_eliza]

IT'S A WHOLE NOTHER STORY WHEN IT'S YOUR MOTHER.

[lorelaiautumn]

THAT'S BULLSHIT AND YOU KNOW IT.

[alchemist_eliza]

DON'T TALK TO ME THAT WAY YOUNG LADY!

[lorelaiautumn]

THERE YOU GO AGAIN! I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO DO ANYTHING AND ALREADY YOU'RE YELLING AT ME!

[alchemist_eliza]

WELL YOU DID SOMETHING THIS TIME.

[lorelaiautumn]

WHAT? WHAT DID I DO WRONG? TELL THE WHOLE SHIP THAT YOU'RE A NOSY BITCH? FINE, I'M SORRY.

[alchemist_eliza]

I'M NOT A NOSY BITCH AND YOU ARE OBVOUSLY NOT SORRY! YOU'D BETTER STOP NOW BEFORE I SMACK YOU!

[lorelaiautumn]

YOU ARE, YOU'RE RIGHT, AND I WON'T!

[alchemist_eliza]

-SLAP TO THE FACE-

[lorelaiautumn]

-SLAPPED; COMPLETELY TAKEN ABACK-