BloMo12: There's venting and then there's this....
Anytime someone tries to tell me what a good person I am, I just have to think about how deeply I hate that the SO is in grad school, and I know better.
Because I do hate it. I do. I should be completely supportive of him finishing his undergrad and earning a grad degree alongside. It's a wonderful opportunity and getting the degree will make him feel much better about future employment. He's in tech and the lack of an undergrad was starting to catch up to him, so the mental relief alone will be worth it to him. I want him to have that peace of mind.
I just wish it wasn't taking so damn long. He's a useless creature when classes are in session. He works a full-time job, takes two classes at a time, and tries to maintain his fair share of our life together. Guess what gets the short shrift when his brain is frazzled?
It doesn't help that college has changed so much. All these online courses and half are being made up on the fly by profs and TAs who don't know what they're doing. The emphasis in online courses is on Busy Work. Prove you're doing something because you're doing it from home and no one sees you working. He spends one night on each class making and replying to blog or forum posts. Then read 300 pages and then write a 3-page paper on the reading, due every weekend like clockwork. None of it overly hard, just designed to suck up your time. Your WEEKEND TIME. (OK, the grad classes are more of the real deal, but still)
I'll admit it, I'm not very supportive. I try to stay out of his way. I've offered to help if it isn't cheating, offered to help him study, helped him pay for classes by maintaining my job despite all frustrations, and not much else.
I resent the time school has stolen from us and I resent him waiting until this late in life to finally go for something I'd been asking him to do for the previous 15 years when we were younger and had more energy.
I'm the worst. Really. Don't make me turn off the comments.
love, lore
P.S. If I made myself look even a little good in the above, I did something wrong.