(и наконец шутки от лектора)
Закончу я все это дело парой шуток от моего лектора:
1)
Engineer died and now he is facing the God. God says:" Sorry, you are not on my list. - Go to Hell." And there he goes. After 2 years God calls the Devil.
G: How does it go there?- says he smiling.
D:You know, it is starting to look great! Now we have a conditioner down there.
G: How come?
D: Ah, that is that awesome engineer you have send to me couple of years ago! We have a celluar network nearly everywhere, motorways are common thing.
G: That is not right! You must send him back to me!
D: Nah. I think, I will get a wifi in my office soon!
G: I will sue you!
Devil starts laughing.
G: Why do you laugh?
Devil still laughing : "And where do you think you will fing a lawyer?"
2)
Engineers usually find some type of activity, when they want to rest hiking/ biking - but this one prefered walking. And there he walks and he sees on the track a frog. It starts jumping and waving at him: 'I am here. I am a beautiful princess, just kiss me - please!'
Engineer smiles, picks her up and puts her into his pocket in his shirt. The frog after short amount of time looks out of the pocket and starts waving at him again: 'I am a beautiful princess, just kiss me and I will be your gilfriend for a week!'. Engineer picks her up, smiles at her and puts her back into the pocket.
Once again the frog starts waving at him and crying: 'I am a beatiful princess, just kiss me and I will do anything you want! It is not that hard - just kiss me!'. Engineer picks her up, smiles at her and puts her back into the pocket.
After some time frog starts: ' Common,man! What is your problem, I said I will do anything for you - just kiss me.'
Engineer picks her up, smiles and says : 'You see, I am an engineer. I don't need a girlfriend - but a taking frog is cool!'
3)
Engineer walks on the track and sees and bottle. "Ah, it seems ancient", - he says and picks it up. He starts wiping the surface with his cloth. The ginie appears, he is a bit pissed after thousands years of inprisonment and he blames engineer for this.
G: I will fulfil three of you wishes, but I know that you hate lawyers. So what you get - lawyer gets twice as much.
E: Ok, my first wish is to have 1 billion dollars - I may not live up with that, but it is a good start.
G: Done, but you realise that every lawyer in the world will get two billions?
E:Yes. I always wanted a castle in the Caribean Sea. That is to be my second wish.
G: Done, but every lawyer gets two. Now it is you last wish...
E: You see, I always wanted to donate a kidney...
1)
Engineer died and now he is facing the God. God says:" Sorry, you are not on my list. - Go to Hell." And there he goes. After 2 years God calls the Devil.
G: How does it go there?- says he smiling.
D:You know, it is starting to look great! Now we have a conditioner down there.
G: How come?
D: Ah, that is that awesome engineer you have send to me couple of years ago! We have a celluar network nearly everywhere, motorways are common thing.
G: That is not right! You must send him back to me!
D: Nah. I think, I will get a wifi in my office soon!
G: I will sue you!
Devil starts laughing.
G: Why do you laugh?
Devil still laughing : "And where do you think you will fing a lawyer?"
2)
Engineers usually find some type of activity, when they want to rest hiking/ biking - but this one prefered walking. And there he walks and he sees on the track a frog. It starts jumping and waving at him: 'I am here. I am a beautiful princess, just kiss me - please!'
Engineer smiles, picks her up and puts her into his pocket in his shirt. The frog after short amount of time looks out of the pocket and starts waving at him again: 'I am a beautiful princess, just kiss me and I will be your gilfriend for a week!'. Engineer picks her up, smiles at her and puts her back into the pocket.
Once again the frog starts waving at him and crying: 'I am a beatiful princess, just kiss me and I will do anything you want! It is not that hard - just kiss me!'. Engineer picks her up, smiles at her and puts her back into the pocket.
After some time frog starts: ' Common,man! What is your problem, I said I will do anything for you - just kiss me.'
Engineer picks her up, smiles and says : 'You see, I am an engineer. I don't need a girlfriend - but a taking frog is cool!'
3)
Engineer walks on the track and sees and bottle. "Ah, it seems ancient", - he says and picks it up. He starts wiping the surface with his cloth. The ginie appears, he is a bit pissed after thousands years of inprisonment and he blames engineer for this.
G: I will fulfil three of you wishes, but I know that you hate lawyers. So what you get - lawyer gets twice as much.
E: Ok, my first wish is to have 1 billion dollars - I may not live up with that, but it is a good start.
G: Done, but you realise that every lawyer in the world will get two billions?
E:Yes. I always wanted a castle in the Caribean Sea. That is to be my second wish.
G: Done, but every lawyer gets two. Now it is you last wish...
E: You see, I always wanted to donate a kidney...